Welcome to Hueco Mundo

After touring the facilitys you and the clerk start walking down a long corridor that slowly strarts to get darker and dirtier the more you go. "Hold on a tic...is that...sand?" You blurt out as you kick a small drift. "Just a bit farther now..." Is all he will say, like a pre-programed answer.

Somehow you've managed to get infront of the clerk as you walk into a huge expance of desert seemingly going on for miles around. "Welcome sir...to Hueco Mundo....." At that criptic statement you Zip around. "WHAT THE FUCK DID...You...just.....say?" Right before your eyes the hallway and clerk seem to shimmer in the wind before dissapearing.

The last site you see is a chilling chesier like grin from the clerk before you start running for your life. "fuck, Fuck, FUCK!!! Why the hell did I agree to this!?" You bemone as you lean against a large sand dune. "Calm down John....this is all just a game...yea, their just fucking with me!"

"Hay Pesche, he dont look to good now don cha know!" "Uh...I dont know, all human's look alike to me Dondochakka." You look up towards the strange voice's. "T-Tiki?! GWAAAHAAA!!!!" You squeel in fright at the sight of the two wierdo's. You'r cry causes them to jump in the air loosing their balance and tumbleing down on top of you.

"Now that was'nt very nice now don' cha' know, we just came to say hello." Tiki boy scolds you lightly as he and the insect struggle trying to get untangled. "That's nice and all but could you maybe, GET THE FUCK OFF ME!?" You wail under the mass of nitwits.

They jump of and stand in line at attention. "Howdy do, Pesche and Dodonchakka's tour guide service, reporting for duty!" The aformentioned Pesche saluts crisply. You sweat drop slightly. "Tour guide?" Dodonchakka nods his huge head. "Yup, we here ta help ya bag a couple of dem Espada ladies don' cha' know."

The two nitwits start shimmying and somehow their masks? start to blush. "He HE, they some fine lookin lady's." And before you can say a word the two idiots grab you by the hands and take of at breakneck speeds. Flying across the dunes towards a large castle all you can think of is the song Speed Demon as you scream like a little girl.

in a matter of moments your infront of a large set of doors. You turn to the nitwits and as your about to ask what now they run off. "What the hell?! I thought you where supposed to help me!?" They stop on a nearby dune and yell back. "No way we're going in their, THEY'LL KILL US! Good luck though!" They wave to you before zooming off.

"GOD DAMMIT!!" You scream as you jump up and down. Suddenly a small door opens and a mechanical eyeball shoots out towards you. "The hell?!" You mumble as it seems to look you up and down. It then shoots back into the wall. "Wierd..." Another door suddenly opens up followed by a small sign poping out. "Hmm...place collar here...."

You shrug your shoulders. "What the hell... I've seemingly lost my mind, so I might as well play along!" You say with a dementadly chipper tone as you toss your collar into the opening. The door shuts with a hissing snap leaveing you seemingly out in the perverbial cold.

Chuckleing you stand dramaticly before the huge doors. "Open sesame!"