Watching TMNT Alone 2: Lost in the Big Apple

“Did you have enough or are you hungry for more,” tween April O’Neil taunted the Wet Bandits that followed her after she caught them robbing the Duncan’s Toy Chest store. They followed her into her uncle’s house that was in the process of getting renovated.

“You brat! By the time I’m through with you, they are going to need a matchbox for your casket!” Shouted Harry of the Wet Bandits. Harry charged up the stairs to grab at April only to fall through a trapped stair. April had left a massive hole in the stairs and had covered it up with a rug.

“Ha! That’s what you get for messing with April and her Ninja Turtles!” April blew a raspberry as she picked up her pet turtles (with color coded mini ninja masks) and ran off to set up and trigger further traps.

“Huh, she is very impressive. Takes down enemies good for kid,” Shampoo declared as she watched TMNT Alone 2: Lost In New York, a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and Home Alone 2: Lost in New York crossover that was released early this year.

“I kinda like the booby traps in the first movie a bit better, a bit more wild and clever,” you comment as the Marv of the movie nearly got impaled by a swarm of flying sai. Marv whimpered at the outline made out of sai that did not actually hurt him but pinned his clothing. A little slow moving turtle with a red ninja mask slowly walking off of a switch.

You patted Starfire’s head as she was curled up in your lap. The pool had long since been drained and swapped out with a cloud-rated sofa and cushion set. Automated dryers had warmed everyone up and let them sit in dry swimsuits. It left things more comfortable after a few hours in the pool.

In the middle of a lapse in the action, Gogo spoke up. “Hey James, something’s been bothering me.”

“What’s that?” You ask, careful not to sit up so as to not disturb the happily purring Starfire.

“Where are we going exactly? And why is it taking us so long?” Gogo asked. “It only took us maybe an hour to get to that trash world and that was 10 lightyears away.”

“Well, for the honeymoon we are going to the resort planet Risa in the Star Trek universe I spent most of my childhood and a good chunk of my pre-Rein Corp life in. My parents apparently bought it after my last visit but there was some problem in universe that made it unsafe to use the portal until now.”

“I read up on the portal tech used and why didn’t we use it back on Earth? All the videos and instructions show people going to their own universe from the comfort of home.”

“Those are for universes bound mainly to a single planet, if you want to bring your own spaceship then you have to go a safe distance from most traffic so as to not interfere with anyone. And it helps make your entrance inconspicuous for space age universes since atmosphere to void and void to atmosphere entrances have an…effect.” You explain recalling some of the explanations your dad gave you.

“Oh so that’s why the trip is taking so long, the traffic around the Solar local cluster is probably lousy with people coming and going,” Gaige concluded, making you recall that Borderlands, while usually bound to just Pandora, was in fact technically part of a civilization spanning five galaxies.

“James, husband who makes my viglodki flutter, I recall when we made these trips before with your parents, it would take us six hours to arrive. But wasn’t that only because they wanted more private time before they engaged in StarFleet or Gardner Pirates activities?” Starfire asked, causing you to pause in your petting of her ears. This caused Starfire to whine before purring again when you restarted. “They had the ship take the scenic route.”

“I wonder why I never made that connection before,” you comment before frowning. “Then we probably should already be where we’re supposed to cross.” You reach over to the panel on top of the sofa and open the comms.

“Hey Hera? What’s the ETA to the coordinates?” It took only a second for Hera to respond.

“Not exactly sure, not the best time to talk,” Hera grunted like she was focusing on something.

“What’s going on?” Aelita asked. You felt a spike of concern as you picked up what sounded like explosions. You pressed a few buttons that switched the TV screens to instead show what was going on outside. Your ship was dancing around the artificially dense asteroid belt while a few other ships tried ramming or blasting some of the asteroids. Some asshats a few decades ago decided that the asteroid belt wasn’t realistic enough and imported asteroids to fix it though they only managed to do a relatively small portion before getting legally stopped.

“Well, we are currently in a space race against a self proclaimed duck, a martian, and thirteen other ships in order to get the last shipment of fuel.” Hera quickly explained as you hear her adjust some settings. “I didn’t sign up for it, just got dragged in by a tractor beam and we can’t deviate from the course. The little nerfherder did something to the controls.”

“Wasn’t the ship topped off before we left?” You were confused, you were sure that you had asked the Toads to refuel the ship before your wedding.

“We were waiting for Mars control to give us our next waypoint clearance when we got pulled in,” Hera hissed as she clipped an old satellite.

“Okay, let us know if anything else comes up,” you say before cutting out the comms. On the TV screens, a notification popped up and when you selected it a live news story started playing.

“Huh what a coincidence,” Diana said as an April O’Neil from the 2003 series appeared behind a news desk.

“If you are just joining us, three major space lanes are currently closed as a Duck Dodgers, a Marvin the Martian, and a Miss Martian are holding thirteen ships including two ferries, 3 taxis, and five private ships hostage. We do not fully know what caused this situation but it appears that it started over who would be allowed to buy a tank of hypermatter fuel.”

“At a glance April, it looks to me that only three or four of the racing ships can even use hypermatter,” commented the Iris West by the April’s side.

“You would be correct, Iris,” April nodded as she was handed a sheet of paper. “It appears that they dragged in the other ships to activate some racing protocols left over from the last Space Grand Prix. Looks like some heads are going to roll.”

“Authorities are trying to shut it down but it looks like the race is on for now so if you had plans to travel through the Solar System, you can expect a lot more traffic. The racers are currently on lap 14 of 100,” Iris declared as a little widget appeared in the corner of the broadcast. You started at the screen with a raised eyebrow

“Well, I guess we have time for a few more movies,” you comment bluntly as you switch back to the TMNT Alone 2 movie. Aelita, Gogo, Laura, and a few others nod in agreement.