Virgin

"Can you get some extra virgin olive oil, tomatoes, lettuce..."

You began to write virgin olive oil when the note erupted into flames before you could even finish the word virgin. You gasped in shock and stared at the spot where the paper once was.

"Did you get all that?"

"Huh?" you say, startled back to your call, "What? Sorry, the pen had no ink. Could you just text me through the list?"

"Uh, yeah, sure?" Jane said, "Love you."

"I love you too. Bye." you say, hanging up the phone.

What the fuck was that? You were just writing when the paper spontaneously combusted. Gone in the blink of an eye. What the actual fuck? Your thoughts were interrupted by Jane texting through the list. You looked at it, seeing about a dozen items.

"Well," you say to yourself, still in shock, "guess I'm going shopping."