Until next year

It's been a year since the last purge. Time for another.

This will be the most dangerous purge for you yet. Your girlfriend (now ex) left you, saying that you had trouble with commitment. The last conversation with her went something like this:

Her: "With how long we've been together, you really need to grow up and let me move it."

You: "I just don't know if I'm comfortable with that."

Her: "You know what? Fuck you. I'll see you and MY balls during the next purge. It's a good thing you don't seem to want kids."