Trust me, I'm a professional (Five Years Later)

I like to think I'm pretty discrete. So far I've never kept a single record of one of my clients, and they greatly appreciate that. Last thing I want is anybody using any of that information against them. They've all got their reputations to uphold. Good, bad or indifferent, and it's nice to just have someone who doesn't judge them. At least that's the way I figure it.

Somehow, I've ended up in the world's oldest profession. I'm not complaining, mind you. I like the work, and I don't have to do anything I don't want to. Surprising how many powerful women don't actually want to be in charge all the time. Took a long time to get the Male Dom role down well enough to do it consistently, and amazingly I don't really have sex that often with clients. It's requested a lot, but it's amazing how many gals change their mind when I insist on a condom. I have too many kids to make those particular mistakes again. Especially when I'm on the clock.

Kaila and I broke up. She decided she didn't want to get a tattoo, and also felt that I was unreasonable for demanding it. I don't hate her or anything, but she decided she didn't want to be a mom, and so I get to be a dad. She's still on time with the child support every time, and visits constantly, but whatever we had is gone. Sometimes I don't know If I ever really was in love with her, or with the idea of her. It works better for her when she makes appointments, I think. Keeping it professional helps. I could be wrong, but she seems happy when she leaves. She's living on her own now in the same apartment. Daniel's a quiet baby, and is happy when his mom visits, but she doesn't seem to want to know much about him.

Carla ended up moving out before I did. She ended up getting a flame tattoo along her right arm which is absolutely gorgeous, and moving down to Carmel to be with a gal she apparently met on the vacation. Her new friend's cute, and I know they're more than just friends, but I don't say anything about it in public because they've asked me not to. Haven't actually had any appointments with Joan, but apparently Charlotte has offered her a freebie any time. She hasn't taken advantage of the offer.

Helen ended up pregnant with a beautiful little girl named Ceto. Charlotte also ended up with a little girl, and wanted to give an old family name of Pallas. They both showed up right about the time that Kaila and I called it quits. Helen insisted that her baby daddy be in her child's life, and as a result I ended up in a little shitty apartment in San Francisco with two pregnant women. Fortunately that didn't last long as that was when I ended up in my new profession.

Nikki ended up staying in California just long enough to get her divorced finalized. It was a great six months having her around, especially as both of the women I was living with were both pregnant and needed the help. She ended up returning to Chicago and her family, but still visits occasionally, and usually has a whole mess of appointment requests. Of course since they're her family, I usually acquiesce, and I've built up a lot of favors with a lot of people. After a while you start to realize that the line between political, criminal and family favors is a lot less precise than you thought.

It had been kinda crazy really how it happened, and nothing I would have expected. Charlotte had simply suggested I meet one of her friends at the bar. We had hit it off, Charlotte had suggested we go back to our apartment, and one thing led to another and there I was in bed with another woman who I had just met that day. Condom was there and everything, and she left the next day very happy. Don't even remember her name. Never saw her again.

And it just kinda started happening over and over again. Charlotte or Helen would suggest I meet somebody, I'd just let things happen, and the next day the gal would be on her way. I always used protection, and Helen and Charlotte just encouraged me with it. Somehow it seemed to turn them on that I was able to immediately make any woman they chose happy and content.

It just seems a shame that the one thing I'm good at, I can't make a living at. And never have. And never will. Honest. Seriously. Look elsewhere Officer Lopez. I mean, the first thing you learn as a prostitute is how to make people think they're special.