To B or not to B cells

"Here we are." you say to mark the arrival.
"Wow!" Olivia exclaims.

As the two of you stand in front of the Bascom Hall the snow falls around you.
"It's bigger than I expected." Olivia says astounded.
"I think that's the reaction of most people seeing a college campus for the first time."
"How were your college days?"
"I didn't go. I dropped out of high school. Getting away from my parents, remember?"
"Yeah, you've mentioned it a couple of times." she giggles.

You're walking around the campus seeing the different departments. The campus is pretty big, so before long you've found a bench.

"Hey, Ollie?"
"'Sup?"
"If you did decide to go to college, what major would you choose."
"Scandinavian studies."
"Why?"
"Wouldn't you like to be able to speak Danish?"
"Who the fuck would like to speak Danish?"
You snicker together.
"Probably something medicine-related." she answers.
"Yeah, that seems more up your alley than LEGO. Any ideas what you would like to do with such a major?"
"Gynecology." she deviously smirk at you.
"See, I know you're joking, but that is genuinely something you would do." you taunt back.
She laughs. It's nice to see her relax a bit and just being herself.

"I wanted to dedicate my working life to research acute lymphoblastic leukemia." she says seriously.
"Because of your dad?" you ask.
"Yeah. I never got to meet him, but mom always spoke highly of him. The way she described him, actually reminds me of how I think of you."
"As in wanting to move in together, start a family, and get two kids?" you tease. Ollie just blushes.
"..."
"..."
"Partly." she finally answers.
Oh wow.
"Partly?"
"Well, the kids part is probably going to be hard." she has put her head in her hands to hide her blushing face. You can feel your heart beating more irregularly. She has, in her own indirect way, kind of admitted to wanting to be with you. While you are flattered this really just kind of confirmed the existence of the big decision looming over your head. Seeing any of these two girls disappointed and heart-broken is fracturing your soul, detonating your being, and erasing your umbra.
Olivia, sensing the dilemma in your head, grabs your hand, and looks at you with a comforting smile.
"Hey, no matter what you decide, we will be a family, right?" she beams at you.
You feel a bit of the tension seep away.
"I like to think we already are one." you smile back.
"Yeah, me too." she agrees.

"Do you think I could go through with it?" Olivia asks: "College, I mean."
"If your grades are just half as good as your sister says they are, and if all of that biology technobabble you've told me is true, then I don't have a doubt in my mind you will get through this just fine." you happily answer.
"Thanks, but I was thinking more of..." she stops and looks down.
"The socializing?" you finish her sentence.
"Yeah..."
"Fuck 'em." you response.
"Who?" Olivia asks you confused.
"Anybody who thinks you should act a certain way. You're always trying to hide away your snark or your nerdiness and it pains me to see that you feel uncomfortable in being yourself. You are in a process of finding yourself. And trust me it's no easier at 21. I still don't know who I am, or what I am going to do, and neither does anybody you will meet on this campus, and everybody that seems like they do is faking it, and are secretly the most insecure of all of you."
"But shouldn't we strive to better ourselves?"
"Sure, but how is hiding that you are witty and smart going to achieve that?"
Olivia doesn't have an answer.
"You're irritatingly good at peptalks." she finally grumbles.
"I'm not sure if I should take that as a compliment or not." you laugh.
You give her another warm smile.

"So how does this leukemia even work?" you ask curiously.
"Oh no, I'll just start another round of my science mumbo jumbo."
"I love your science mumbo jumbo, and you shouldn't hide it."
"Okay well... in your body there are a bunch of blood cells. Red blood cells and white blood cells. Red blood cells mostly serve to transport oxygen to the rest of the body, but the white blood cells serves a variety of purposes relating to your immune system."
"Right." you already knew this, but you are happy she is taking it slow.
"Well, some of your white blood cells are called B cells. They're like the virus detection software of your body. If a virus infects your body, there are are billions of B cells, each with one of billions of possible combinations of antigens on their membranes, and if a virus match a particular B cell's antigens, the B cell will then begin to form into more of that particular B cell and basically start to tag all of the infectious viral agents, and then the rest of the immune system know that they should do something about them. Of course, it's way more complicated than that, but that's the main idea."
"I think, I got it so far." you say, keeping focus or you know you will be lost in the explanation.
"B cells do, however, need to mature, but acute lymphoblastic leukemia increases the production of immature B cells, leaving your body very much more prone to disease. If untreated, it would kill you in months, maybe weeks."
"Whoa..."
"Yeah. "
"Why would you ever hide this type of knowledge, Ollie?"
"I don't know... part of me thinks that me being different is going to weird people out, and then I will be to use of no one."
"Well, having a lot of different kinds of cells seem to work out for your body, why not society? Your personality might not be the antigen to everything, but it has certainly been helpful to get me through some of the shit I've been dealing with."
"And like what you're doing for me right now." she smiles.
"Just to recap my two peptalks," you finalize: "You shouldn't be ashamed of your body, because you're gorgeous, and you shouldn't be ashamed of your personality, because it's fantastic. You're just in the process of exploring both. And soon enough, you will be a fully grown B cell that can distribute antigens that make the world a better place."
"I don't think you've quite understood it but... Thanks Asta."
"Don't mention it, Ollie."

You walk around a bit more, you eat a sandwich, and are now standing at the bus stop to get back to the flat.
"Astrid? Can I ask you for something selfish?" Olivia asks getting a bit serious.
"I don't know, can you?" you tease. Olivia looks at you with a playful are-you-fucking-serious kind of face.
"Go ahead." you say.
"Can I kiss you?"

Where the hell did that come from?

"It's just..." Olivia stammers: "if we were to... you know... get together, then you and Vee would have already tried kissing, but if you get with my sister, then I would never have tried kissing you, so I thought..."
Well, this got awkward. You still don't know how you feel about either Vee or Ollie. You also just feel kind of weird knowing that both Ollie and Vee know that their sister is a rival, and that they both seem to not care nearly as much about that as you do.
Reluctantly, you do agree.

"It will be my first real kiss" Olivia states shyly: "so don't be too disappointed if it's not any good."

You grab each other gently, and you move your lips together.

Instantly, you become aware of every minuscule movement inside of you. You can feel every bone, every organ, every ounce of blood rocking. Cells splits. Deoxyribonucleic acid gets tangled in their frantic dance. Molecules gyrate, protons vibrate, neutrons fall apart, and electrons flip the fuck out.

As your lips part your hyper-awareness subsides.
Kissing Olivia was different than kissing Vanessa. Kissing Vanessa felt like art, kissing Olivia felt like nature.
Olivia holds your hand all the way back to the flat.

After the dinner that evening, Vanessa and Olivia tentatively approach you.
"Hey, Asta." Vanessa starts: "Ollie and I need to talk about something, so we are going outside, visit a coffee shop, or one of those fast food chains that are open really late, and we will talk some things out."
You already know what they're going to talk about.
"Okay. I'll be here, when you come back." you reassure them.
"It's probably going to be late, so don't worry about going to bed before we're back, okay?"
"Okay Vee."
And just like that, for the first time in what feels like a millennium you are alone.

You spend the rest of the day working. Your mind's racing makes it hard to concentrate.

The kings size bed feels comically large to you now that you are all alone.

In the end, despite the lack of body warmth, you do fall asleep.