To: Story Reader*

*Yes, your parents, Mr. And Mrs. Avid and Palm Reader named you Story. You hate them just a little bit for that. Guess it beats your sister's name, Lip*

To: Story Reader

From: Papa Sean Gold, your new boss

Congratulations, young person on impressing my Club Operations Director, Dakka Peppard, during the open interview process held at your community college's gymnasium on December 1st of 2025.

*I think I'd remember if I interviewed with a Dakka Peppard for an internship at a place with a champagne room. Plus, there is no way the Board of Community College Grants would allow Club Voodoo to be part of the event. They didn't allow Ta-tas or Da Hustla Club, two well-established and beloved in the community, strip clubs, to even donate to the fund.*

I know you must be saying to yourself that you couldn't have interviewed with a strip club. The board wouldn't even take money from beloved and established businesses that also have their employees end up naked, dancing on a pole, that doesn't require them to be part of the butcher's union as well as be a trained phlebotomist. You dear Mr. Reader, would be correct. You interviewed with Gold Realty, and our Sr. Realtor, one Mr. Alouicious Pibb, he was a little XTRA, I'm guessing.

The deception was necessary though. They werent going to let us hire an intern. It took a shell realty company to even donate money. Now, before you start to get froggy, know two things. You try and turn me in or not show up to work on Monday, then you're going to be assigned to scrubbing cum outside of Club Voodoo for minimum wage, or you can go to prison for the next 14 years. Or you can work the highest paid internship, over triple minimum wage plus benefits, a 100% liklihood you’ll get a higher paying position plus more benefits, and watch your former classmates scrub cum outside everyday. Your call

Sincerely,

Papa Sean