The love regulator's late

This was probably the end. Sixty eight and I can't even beat my meat. Not that I had enough worth jacking it to. I lift my one arm to take a drag off my smoke watching the sun set, something's growling. Could be my stomach, or the stomach of something eyeing me. Not much I can do, my truck's out of gas in this dead wasteland of a desert. And with how beat up my old bones are I already know I won't get far, doesn't help my working eye's half blind. Typical response to a bottle to the face.

"HEY! HEY! Hey you!" A woman's voice cried. I looked around, my mind's fading, I probably don't have a gun, or even bullets for that matter. But what's left of my life almost wants to preserve it. Still holding my cigarette I reach around half heartedly looking for something to defend myself. "Hey!" The woman stopped infront of my truck bed as I slump in my spot. If I'm gonna die might as well be comfortable.

"Are-are you-" The woman is completely out of breath "Are you Tony? Tony Mandleson?" She asked, for a desert bandit I definitely never expected somebody dressed like a meter maid with a bob cut and glasses. Taking another puff I responded

"I don't have anything worth taking. But yeah." What was the point in lying. More work than I felt like doing right now.

She smiled a strange smile for somebody out for mayhem and . She took out a clipboard and checked a box. Some kill ritual I'd guess. "Ok, I'm very sorry for being so late. Do you have any questions before I get to work?" She asked

With nothing left to care about I finished my smoke "Nope." All I felt like saying and even that was feeling like a hassle.

"Ok! Great! This'll just take a moment." She took out what looked like a police radar gun with some kind of plunger on it. She turned the plunger and shut her eyes pushing it down creating a blinding light. Seemed strange but so did everything else

"HOW'S THIS FO-" and instantly I was "home" my... mom about to punch me and press my hand on the stove for asking if I can audition for the school band. More so I was ten years old again. Looking from the dingy kitchen table where I was supposed to be squarely smacked away from I could see down the hall, my big heartless bitch of a sister, Claire watching everything, despite being seventeen she's standing there doing nothing. Though at this point I should be getting second degree burns and begging for anybody to help me. I remembered her just watching indifferent to all of it playing out but as I look back Mom is stunned

"T-Tony I'm so... so sorry I was just so angry about- It doesn't matter, you didn't do anything. I shouldn't have taken my anger out on you." Mom said looking like she just saw the error of her ways. She knelt down and put her hand on my shoulder "I was wrong, I won't be that cruel ever again, sweetie. I promise. Ok?" She asked

But before I could say anything Claire spoke up "I'm sorry to! I was watching the whole thing! I should have come the second I saw that look in mom's eyes but, but for some awful, awful reason I just thought I'd watch! I'm a terrible big sister Tony! Please forgive me!"

Mom and Claire started crying and I just didn't know what was going on at this point and then they stop. "Ok, everything seems in acceptable levels here. Any questions or concerns?" The strange meter maid was back, she didn't look winded anymore but rather self assured like she had finished a hard day's work.

"What the hell is going on!?" I screamed

Meter maid chuckled "Ok this is super embarrassing, right around here is where I was supposed to intervene." Meter maid pulled a stand and chart much to big for her fanny pack. She put the chart on the stand and drew a horizontal red line across it and one above that. "So this middle line is where trauma is supposed to reach at any point in somebody's life. Now this higher line is the extremes of trauma, stuff that's supposed to happen MAYBE once in a someone's lifetime." Almost instantly the Meter drew a blue line starting from the bottom left and zig zagging across the chart to the right end of it. "As you can see you've endured a disturbingly high count of traumas. Such as right here." Meter maid pointed to the first time the blue line rises above the second red line. "My job is to mitigate that." She erased the segment of the blue line rising above the first red line and drew a green line in place of it

"And since I am quite embarrassingly late to fixing all this, my manager has instructed me to turn your chart from that to... something like this." Looking at the chart now there was a green line entirely on the bottom of the chart

"I-I don't understand why did any of this happen if you... whatever you are are supposed to-to not even, what's happening!?" My mind was having such a hard time keeping up

Meter maid joined my frozen mom and sister in kneeling next to me, she smiled reassuringly "I wish none of the bad things ever happened to you. I'm going to fix them. Every last one. You survived so much pain and , abandonment and you still refused to take it out on anybody. So now all you have to do is relax and enjoy what comes of it. Welcome to your life, Tony." Meter maid started to glow and fade out "Oh and my name's Crystal. I'll be around if you need anything." She winked and disappeared and then Mom and Claire resumed crying

"P-please can't you just go back to acting normal?" I pleaded with the two sobbing women

"Normal!?" Mom raised her head tears streaming down her face "We've been so awful you think it's normal for your family to hit you and take their frustrations out on you!? That's how you feel!?" Mom cried in disgust, I had pretty much told myself what she said just now my entire life but seeing it coming from her with so much remorse and shock at the very idea of what I'd seen her be my entire life shook me to my core and I could feel tears welling up inside me.

"No! Not happening! I'm never ever gonna treat you like that again you understand, little brother! I love you and I was supposed to love you for so many years!" Watching Claire pour out her feelings to something was different, as she spoke her eye seemed to sparkle and sparkle more, she was looking taller and... bustier, her hips were getting wider and her hair was getting longer. If she wasn't my sister this would be amazing. And then she lifted me up, she was definitely taller, despite being just seven years older than me my feet reached her waist while I was eye level with her, looking at her spotless face and big plump lips trying to give a reassuring smile through her tear soaked face, though despite that her eyes weren't puffy and my being just wanted her to stop feeling bad

"C-Crystal!" I called and everything froze again, Crystal was floating next to me and Claire

"Yep, lot of changes. I'm still calculating your first decade of life and you've got a LOT of chips. So I figured I'd do some auto pilot for you right now. Get you situated with things. You like Claire like this yes?" Crystal asked

"L-like her!? She looks like a blow up doll!" I said nervously

"Do you want me to undo it?" Crystal asked curiously

"Yes! This isn't how anything's supposed to be!" I said in shock

"Isn't it? After the life you've had nobody has the right to tell you how it's supposed to be but you. I'm just here to make sure it's been amended to your liking. But if you really want it to go back I need you to say it. I need you to say "Crystal, turn my sister back to normal." and she'll be just as cold and indifferent to you as she was before. So Tony, what do you have to say?" Crystal asked

"... Can... Can Claire wear knee high socks and a skirt?" Tony blushed

Crystal smiled "Of course. Anything else?" Crystal asked

"Why am I a kid again? I still know what's happened." Tony questioned

"True, your body is your body when you were ten. But your mind is still there. Everything I'm doing now would mean nothing if you didn't experience the hardship's from the unsupervised life you had just been through." Crystal explained

"S-so everything I'm feeling towards my sister?" Tony asked

"Normal. Anything you want to do with her would seem perfectly fine. Considering how loving and attractive she is, nobody would think twice about you wanting to express those feelings. Your family would definitely be delighted to encourage some affectionate bonding with you." Crystal remarked

"E-encourage?" Tony asked, he was turning completely red, a word that should be common place and synonymous with family felt totally foreign to Tony, just the idea seemed like he'd searched something dirty online. Crystal smirked like a devil

"Now you're getting it. You've got a golden ticket here, Tony. All inclusive experience, you just need to pick it." Crystal said before floating away "Oh and don't be surprised with your Mom right now, k?" She said before disappearing

Looking back, Claire was holding him infront of her valley of chest staring into her grief stricken eyes searching for his response, to make things better. Crystal had made it very hard to look at this anyway but as a positive. "Can I..." Tony couldn't even bring himself to say it. Claire brought him closer

"What was that?" Claire asked

"We'll do it, Sweetie, we promise." Hearing his mom's voice he looked and she was even bigger and curvier than Claire was. Her long shining hair almost to her feet

"Guh... can..." Tony struggled, Mom put her hands on his back as the two lovingly waited for his request, All he could do was hang in his sister's arms helpless, marinating in the strange near blinding love radiating from his big sister and... mommy. "H-hug please." Tony managed to squeak out, the two were over joyed and quick to oblige. Saturating the situation with so much kind and maternal words, giving a life time's lack of love twenty fold.

He was overwhelmed to say the least