The Womanless Pageant

Julia Carmichael rhythmically tapped her fingers against her desk as the professor droned on, her eyes watching the clock intently, only shifting to keep an eye on the young man sitting two rows ahead in the lecture hall. When class finally let out, she immediately grabbed her things and started off after her classmate, who was usually the first one out of the door at the end of class.

“Hey, you’re Albert, right?” she asked, leaning on the chair of the next row down.

“Uh, yeah, but you can call me Al.” he replied, nervously.

“I’m Julia, I sit a few rows behind you. I was wondering if I could ask you for a little favor…” Julia started.

“Sure, what do you need?” Al asked, fumbling as he tried to put his notebook into his backpack.

Julia thought it was cute how nervous he seemed at just talking to her, she’d dealt with a lot of macho guys hitting on her, and it was interesting to see the complete opposite of that type of man.

“It’s gonna take some explaining, why don’t we meet for coffee later? My treat?” Julia held out her phone. “I’ll text you when and where.”

“Okay,” Al quickly picked his bag up and slung it over his shoulders, before taking the phone and entering his number into it. Girls didn’t usually talk to him at all, and even less so needing favors, so he was very curious.

“Thanks,” Julia took her phone back and put it back into her bag.

Slightly awkwardly, the two then started walking out of the lecture hall together, as they stepped into the hallway, they were approached by a group of three other young women, who seemed to be waiting expectantly for them.

“So, did he say yes?” one of the girls, a slightly chubby goth asked.

“I didn’t ask him yet, I told you that I’d handle it on my own, this didn’t have to be a group activity!” Julia admonished her friends.

“Ask me what?” Al asked, now even more curious, given that it seems to involve an entire group of girls. A slightly less mature part of his brain fantasized about the possibilities.

“Well, I guess there’s no sense explaining over coffee like I’d hoped…” Julia sighed, then turned to Al. “So, we’re rushing the Gamma Alpha Lamba sorority, have you heard of them?”

“The Gamma Gals? Of course I have, everyone on campus has.” Al said.

“Good, so every year, for their pledges, they have certain activities that we have to fulfill in order to get in. This year, they’re holding a pageant. A womanless pageant.” Julia started.

Al seemed confused, but didn’t interrupt, allowing Julia to continue her spiel.

“The idea is to find a male in your life, a brother, a boyfriend, etcetera, dress ‘em up like a girl and have them strut across the stage. And the group with the most convincing entrant, the one who passes as a girl the best, they’re pretty much guaranteed to get into the sorority.” Julia finished. “And that’s the favor, will you be our entrant?”

“Me? But… why me?” Al asked. “Couldn’t you ask one of your boyfriends or something?”

“Well, I’m single,” Julia remarked.

“And I’m not, but I don’t have a boyfriend.” the goth girl smirked.

“And our boyfriends said no,” one of the two other girls, a tall redhead, added.

“Besides, mine could never pass as a girl,” the other of the two girls, a brunette with curly hair, said.

“And you think that… that I could pass as a girl?” Al asked. “Gee, that makes me feel great!”

“It’s not like that, and don’t sweat it, we don’t mean anything by it, but you’re pretty thin, you’ve got great eyelashes, you’re cute as a guy, but you’d be a knockout as a girl.” the redhead said.

“But what do I get out of it?” Al asked. “If you win, you get into the sorority, but I’m still the one on stage dressed in a dress and heels in front of everybody.”

“That’s a good point…” the brunette said. “I didn’t really think that far ahead.”

“Don’t worry, because I did.” Julia said. “If you help us, and this is win or lose, I’ll take you out on a date.”

Al’s heart practically stopped, because she had no way of knowing that Al had been crushing on her since the first day of classes, right? It’s not like he’d done anything about it, and she sat behind him, so it’s not like she’d have caught him staring at her, but he’d been too scared to do anything else but stare at her as she walked in the room, never looking towards him. He’d do anything for a date with her. But did he really mean it?

“You’ve made a very solid offer, so I think I’m gonna have to say…” Al started.