The 1-Trillionth Sweepstakes

"So.... I'm dead?"

"You're dead!"

"But I'm God?"

"The One and Only!"

"Because I won the... what did you call it?"

"The 1-Trillionth Sweepstakes!!! The last guy set it up before leaving; basically, whoever was lucky enough to be the trillionth human to die in all of history gets to be God going forward!"

"Huh."

"So, any thoughts on what you want to do first?"

"Oh, for sure something horny."

"Yeah, I figured as much."