Technology Check: Taking Ten

As tempting as it was to celebrate the come from behind victory, best practices dictate than the last place you want to be immediately after a fight is still in the spot that fight happened. It's been proven that fights happen there, after all. That's just science. So it wasn't until Ali and her two companions were safely ensconced in a reliable safe house two floors up that Febee spoke. "So are you going to introduce me to your friend, or what?"

Ali glanced up from her workstation, arranging the tools of her hacker's kit around the datashard. "Febee, this is Charlie; Charlie is great. Charlie, this is Febee; Febee is Febee."

The elf rolled her eyes. "Fatima Belladona du Verre." She leaned back in her chair, regally proffering her hand towards the Charlie's silent bulk. "Charmed."

Charlie didn't respond for a moment. When they first met, Ali had thought getting a read on the remake's body language would be roughly as easy as getting a read on an actual statue. Now that she knew them a bit better, though, she was beginning to recognize that they weren't quite so inscrutable on careful observation.

Not that this was the toughest case to crack; awkward pauses are practically the universal language, right after erections. Still, before much longer Charlie took Febee's dainty hand in their massive one, carefully bending at the waist to gingerly tap her fingers against their blank faceplate in a pantomime of a kiss. "Hello Fatima Belladona du Verre."

"Well aren't you just darling!" Febee looked rather like a child presented with an exciting new plaything. "Please, call me Febee."

"Okay Febee."

"Charlie, be a dear and indulge me for a moment?" Charlie tilted their head to the side as Febee lowered onto a dusty armchair with all the poise of an empress ascending her throne. She imperiously crossed one leg over the other, settled back, and made a little spin with her finger.

Ali sighed from her table, popping the case off of the datashard with a small screwdriver. "Charlie, you really don't have to do that."

The remake must not have objected too badly, however, as they began to slowly turn in a little circle. That, Ali reasoned, or Charlie was just overly eager to please. There was going to have to be a serious talk between Ali and Febee about taking advantage of their agreeable companion, and soon.

-ma'am what about when you intercoursed them you on camera-

Ali blinked, then slumped over her table in an attempt to appear absorbed in her work. She subvocated to Auto-Correct, neck flushing at being called out. "That was different. So different."

-ma'am please explain how Miss du Verre's actions are peer pressure and yours were not-

"Shouldn't you be bringing up those specs you worm?!"

-ma'am yes immediately please spit in my mouth ma'am-

The scholar grumbled as Auto downloaded the tech display for the hacker's kit into her glasses, annoyance and chagrin over her light scolding overwhelming the faint ones and zeroes that popped and bubbled up her spine. The others didn't seem to notice, at least, Febee giving a thoughtful hum as she closely inspected the very much on-display Charlie. "Hm." She twisted a finger in her long blonde hair, considering the remake's body. "Well you've certainly got an aesthetic, Charlie Dear. Is all this,"--she waggles a hand, indicating Charlie's towering yet generic form--"A choice, or a necessity? Are we going for a minimalist thing? Or are we a victim of circumstance? The look certainly works, darling, I just can't help but be curious."

Charlie's voice is as flat-toned as ever, their circle finally finished. "I don't know."

It was clear that Febee wasn't going to let up if she was allowed to continue on interrupted, but the fortuitous discovery of a hiccup gave Ali a clean way to change the subject. "Febee, there's some sort of advanced sub-encryption on this. Separate from the primary memory."

Febee shrugged, the twinkling look of mischief in her eyes fading at the interruption of business. "It's probably an editing routine. Executive planners don't usually have information that's all that secretive, but they technically record everything that goes on around the user' desk. It's common practice to install an add-on that shunts whatever the user would consider more sensitive into a much more secure storage. Do you think you can crack it?"

"Well..." Ali trailed off, frowning as she thoughtfully ran a hand through her hair. "Maybe. Um, I'd have a shot, at least."

The elf cocked an eyebrow. "If you aren't sure, don't try. Those things usually have a kill switch, so if you fuck it up the entire datashard will wind up bricked."

"Right. Totally. That's why I wasn't going to do it." The scholar, who was absolutely about to try doing it, frowned. "Is that going to be an issue?"

"It would have been nice, obviously, but I don't suppose it will be too much of an issue. All we really want to know is where Father was meant to be on the day he went missing, and I doubt he would have considered that 'sensitive'." Febee offered Ali a smile of pure sweetness. "It does mean the rate of my supposed expert should probably be lower, however."

"First off," Ali pointed her screwdriver resolutely at Febee, "Not a chance. Contract's already finalized, sister. Second, are you sure he wouldn't think his own whereabouts should stay secret? You and I both know how messed up corpos get with that cloak-and-dagger skullduggery bullshit."

Febee scoffed. "Well sure, but you remember what my father's like. He's a dyed in the wool himbo. He's maybe the least subtle man in existence; the only stratagem he understands is the dick-first charge. Honestly, if he had been trying to keep his comings and goings secret? That would have made it way easier to find him. We could've just followed the trail of cum dripping out of his secretary straight to him."

"Gross. Got it, though."

Any further rejoinder was interrupted by the insistent beep from Febee's cyberdeck, the elf's face crinkling in disgust. "Ugh. I've got to go do my stream. How clean is the other room?"

"Not very."

"Blah." Febee rose with a long-suffering sigh. "Well whatever. It's not like there'll be any eyes not glued to my tits the whole time." She turned, waggling her fingers in affectionate farewell to Charlie as she sauntered off. "Looking forward to working with you, Charlie~"

Ali sighed, plugging the stripped datashard into her palmtop computer as they were finally left alone. "Sorry about her, Charlie. Febee's the sort of person who sort of rubs you the wrong way, at first. Then you get to know her and realize she's even worse."

"Okay."

A heavy silence descended on the room, the sound of Ali's fingers tapping against her computer's haptic display practically as loud as gunshots. At length, Ali glanced over to where Charlie quietly stood in the corner of the room. "...You don't have to stand all the way over there, you know?"

"I do not want to bother you while you are working Professor Ali."

Ugh okay that was starting to get embarrassing. "Um, you can probably just call me 'Anais', Charlie."

The remake gave the slightest hesitation. "..Okay Anais."

Ali scooted her chair to the side, still tapping away at her screen as Charlie made their way over and sunk cross-legged onto the floor beside her. Without the distractions of combat or the constraints of a ticking clock, the work needed to crack the datashard was actually pretty brainless. It was just going to take time. Time that was a perfect opportunity for a bit of a heart-to-heart. "So hey, Charlie. About what happened on that last job."

The remake's head, very nearly at level with Ali's from his position seated on the floor, tilted slightly. "I am listening Anais."

The scholar pulled off her glasses, letting her computer start to churn through the last bit of script. "Are you still okay with it? It was sort of a lot of pressure. I sort of put you under a lot of pressure. I think I should maybe feel a bit bad about it."

Charlie's head tilted a little lower. "Do you feel bad about it."

"Well, uh, no. I mean, unless you do? Then I feel super bad? Retroactively?"

"I do not feel bad."

"Oh! Okay then! Then it was a lot of fun!" Ali grinned in relief, leaning over to playfully bop her shoulder into Charlie's. "Do that sort of thing a lot, do we?"

"That was my first time."

"What, in on camera? Or, like, in a dungeon? Because yeah, I'm right there with you."

"It was my first time doing it."

Ali didn't have a chance to fully digest that particular revelation, because at that moment her palm computer finished cracking the datashard and activated its projector, materializing a two foot display of the recordings held within into the air. That was Pierrepont du Verre alright; Febee's father sported the same bronze tan, giant white teeth and single stupid feather earring he'd had for the last hundred years. And apparently he didn't count porno-railing his secretary on his desk as "sensitive information".

Ali's hand flailed in a desperate attempt to rewind the recording to a point in the day when the executive elf wasn't indulging in a goddamn fuckfest, but it seemed that there was no avoiding scene upon scene of the toned elf stuffing his obscenely pregnant but otherwise willowy assistant with buckets of cum. He had her splayed out on the desk, he had her riding him in his chair, she sucked his stubby dick while he tried to read the same single sheet of paper for over an hour. Does this guy do any fucking work that isn't, well, fucking work?

It seemed there would be a brief reprieve when the secretary ordered Mr du Verre lunch, still coated in globules of jizz from his finally wilting cock. But then a busty little goblin brought sushi, and they ate it off her naked body, and then all three of them fucked UGH.

At long last Ali managed to find a portion of the day that apparently met Mr du Verre's rigorous standards for privacy, the empty static of the removed video a welcome respite. Blah, she was definitely bright red at this point. Ali was no prude; she'd fucked in plenty of offices and eaten plenty of things off of plenty of titties. Something about it being flaunted like this never failed to make her all awkward and blushy, though. It was annoying.

Still, she knew she wasn't alone. Charlie may have lacked the physical capacity to blush, but something in their bearing made the remake's feelings as clear as day. "Pretty embarrassing, right?"

Much to Ali's surprise, Charlie's head shot up at that. "Yes I am very embarrassed."

"Uh." Ali blinked. "Cool? I mean, not cool? I mean, it's uncool that this happened but it is cool because I feel that way too? Ugh I'm a fucking mess."

Charlie didn't seem to notice Ali's response trailing off into a semi-coherent stream of self recrimination. "How did you know. Did you guess."

It took Ali a moment to realize that those were meant to be questions, Charlie's normally declarative speech patterns seemingly thrown off. "W-well, no. I wouldn't say so. You just...I mean, you are embarrassed, right?"

"I am. I am mortified." The remake's normally even-toned voice had taken on an odd quality, almost as if the words were being queued up faster than they could be processed. "We were discussing my virginity and then a bunch of pornos started playing. It was like a nightmare. I was very very embarrassed. I--"

Charlie's heartfelt admission was cut off when the projected static turned back into video. Ali couldn't help but groan in frustration, peevishly throwing her screwdriver across the room. Oh great, the fuck show can continue! Something was different this time, though; Mr du Verre was actually seated at his desk now. "--not a bad idea, actually. Wellness is universal after all, right?" The executive drummed his fingers across his desk. "The legwork's all done, anyway. Ehhhhh~" He blew a rasperry, mulling whatever the issue was over, "Fine, whatever. What's the name of that nice spa? Isn't there a real good one right around there?"

There was a loud pop, and then a mellifluous voice answered. "The Juicy Peach Onsen, sir."

The recording of du Verre snapped his fingers. "That's it! Yeah, perfect. I can charge the whole damn thing as a business expense afterwards. I..." He twitched, a look of dumb pleasure washing over his face before he groaned, arching a wad of cum into the air to splat heavily against his desk. He growled as he bolted out of his chair, pulling his secretary up from between his legs and bending her over. "Get up here you little--"

Ali quickly shut down her computer, the thrusting grunts and wet slaps that heralded the Ms Secretary's return visit to Pound Town fading away. Any more of that and she'd start blushing again, and that would even further undercut the moment that had already been interrupted. "Sorry Charlie; you were saying?"

The remake responded immediately, their voice as even and flat as ever. "Nothing. You found the information we needed. We have important--"

"Hey, no." Ali spun her chair around to directly face Charlie, frowning as she poked a finger into their wide chest. "The way you feel isn't nothing. Other things aren't more important. Yes, we've found a clue, but we've got time to talk this out. You're just trying to brush past an awkward conversation, aren't you?"

"I--" Charlie's voice cut out, and it was a moment before they spoke again. "..People do not usually understand how I am feeling."

"Well Charlie," Ali lifted her hand, affectionately cupping the side of the remake's featureless face. "People are dumbos."

"Yes Anais." Charlie raised their hand, very gently placing their fingers over Ali's. "They are dumbos."