Subterfuge.

Jerry snorted groggily. His face itched. He tried to reach up to scratch it, but his arm stopped abruptly. His watery eyes shot open and he tried to get out of bed. As he fell the floor with a painful thump, he realized he was bound at the wrists and feet. He started to cry out in fear and pain when a feminine hand clamped around his mouth and felt something hard behind his left ear.

"Ok, Jerry. I need to you to be quiet when I pull my hand off of your mouth. Do you-"

He bit down hard on the woman's palm, causing her to shout in pain and withdraw her hand. He snarled and began to turn when something hit his head hard and he blacked out.

"Shit, what the fuck?" Janet held her bleeding hand gingerly. Sam stared impassively. "Go get some gauze or something! What the hell is wrong with this guy?"

Sam returned and, at her sister's instruction, started to treat the small bite wound with antiseptic. "Jerry's very, very angry. He's a bitter misogynist with no friends or romantic partners. He's driven everyone away and has been living alone for over a decade. That's what's wrong with him." She stared down at the drooling man on the floor as she described him.

"Jesus, ok. I guess that makes sense. Now how are we gonna get him in the car?" Janet winced as her sister wrapped gauze tightly around her palm.

Sam replied without emotion. "It would have been easier if he was still conscious. However, I think we can back the car into the driveway and load him into the trunk with minimal exposure. It helps that it's late at night."

Janet sighed. "Sam, can I please ask you to attach to me? This robot voice thing is really creepy. I want my sister back."

Sam simply nodded and closed her eyes. A moment later, she opened them in an expression of horror. Emitting a wordless scream, she ran into the bathroom to vomit. She stayed there for several minutes and returned with red-rimmed eyes. "Oh my God, I can't believe that happened! What the fuck?" She kicked the **** man in the ribs, eliciting a small groan of pain.

Janet leaned in for a hug. They held it for several minutes as Sam wept softly. When they broke it off, Sam sniffled. "Do you really think this will work?"

Janet shrugged. "It's your idea. Do you?"

After loading him into the trunk as discreetly as possible, the two got on the road. Sam insisted on driving ("it'll take my mind off of- ugh") and they talked through the plan. They arrived at Jake's place after about twenty minutes.

Opening the trunk, they saw that Jerry was beginning to stir. "Fucking whores..." He glared hatefully at them through half-lidded eyes. Janet reached down and pressed against the bruise on his head where he had been hit. He almost passed out again as he groaned in pain. "Jerry, we don't have time for this. Keep it down or I'm going to make you keep it down again."

He scowled but said nothing. Fortunately, Jake's apartment was on the ground floor near the parking lot. They marched him into the apartment and Janet sat him on the couch while Sam went to Jake's room. "Where the fuck are we?" he grunted.

Sam stuck her head out of the bedroom. "Janet, you need to come in here. We may have a problem."

Janet sternly told Jerry to behave and stepped away. He heard her murmur from the other room and the two quickly returned. "Ok, Jerry." She gestured for him to stand. "We need you to do something for us."

He spat weakly, falling several feet short of her. "Fuck you."

She stood him up and the two grabbed him by the shoulders and dragged him into the room. He was too weak to resist much, but when he saw the streaks of blood all over the floor his eyes widened and adrenaline surged in his veins. "What the fuck? No! No!" He started to struggle. "What are you, serial killers? Help! Help!"

Sam clamped a hand over his mouth, correctly surmising that he was too panicked and distracted to bite her again. They shoved him towards the desk, which was cluttered with papers. In the middle sat a small, pink egg-shaped object. "Just pick it up, Jerry." Sam said. Janet **** his arm out toward it. "Jerry, we need you to pick it up."

Jerry struggled but the women were stronger. He didn't know what this thing would do but he knew it was futile to fight it. It might burn his arm off or blow up or something but he was gonna have to grab it. He closed his eyes and wrapped his hand around it.

Instantly he felt it dissolve in his grasp. There was a brilliant flash of light, and without even being aware of falling he realized he was on the ground staring up at the ceiling.