Soaking it all up for fun, but now I only soak up wine

It was kind of bizarre for Nick to be up on stage watching the women in his harem trying their various wines. As he did, he noticed Mary shifting uncomfortably in her seat.

“Hey, is everything okay?” He asked worriedly, turning to his wife.

Mary flinched and her hand shot to her stomach. She looked warily up at him and bit her lip.

“You… you don’t really think I’m going to have to drink any wine, do you?” Mary asked. “My baby…”

“Oh, please,” Dakota said, rolling her eyes. “You don’t have to drink it, Mary. I’ll make a special exemption just for you. You can spit into the bucket too.”

“Ah… well, okay then,” Mary said, breathing a sigh of relief.

Nick’s ears twitched.

“…Wait, then does that mean we have to drink it?!” He questioned. “Since we don’t have a ‘special exemption’ or anything?”

“Yes,” Dakota said, staring directly at him.

Well, great.

Nick sighed and rubbed his forehead in frustration. Holly doubled over, giggling.

“At least they look like they’re having fun down there,” she pointed out, gesturing to the girls on the floor below.

“Fun” wasn’t exactly the word Ella would use to describe her situation right now. Or Morgana, for that matter. Both girls were holding their first sample sips with trembling hands, worried about what would come.

“So, uh… yeah,” Morgana gulped, pressing the glass to her lips. How many times had she imagined herself leaning back on a dark throne with a glass of wine in her hand, sitting regally like the queen of witches? But now that she was actually faced with the prospect of underage drinking, she was wondering what the big fuss about wine even was.

Ella watched the other girl warily. Unlike Morgana she was old enough to drink, but that didn’t mean she felt any desire to do so. Her heart pounded in her chest, and she waited with baited breath to see what the result would be.

Morgana tilted her head back and sipped. She practically spit it out immediately.

“Blegh…” she groaned, emptying the wine into the spitting buck. “That’s so gross… is all wine supposed to taste like that?”

“You’re just too immature to truly appreciate the fine flavors of a premium vintage,” Rose sniffed, tilting up her chin with a snobby expression.

Morgana glared at her. “Oh, really?” She frowned. “Well, Ella agrees with me, wine tastes bad! Don’t you, Ella?”

She knew that she shouldn’t be dragging the other girl into her drama, but she couldn’t help herself with Rose’s attitude!

“Uh… I-I haven’t even… tasted it yet…” Ella stammered, looking at her own glass. She’d chosen the same bottle as Morgana, so if the goth girl didn’t like it, would she?

Ultimately, she decided to just go for it. So she took a quick sip, and found it…

…

Huh.

It wasn’t… that bad? But it didn’t taste good, either.

Ella swished it around in her mouth a little before spitting it out, testing the flavor.

“Well?” Rose asked, smiling eagerly.

Ella looked warily at the expectant Morgana. “It… it wasn’t that bad,” she admitted, shaking her head. She couldn’t meet Morgana’s disappointed gaze.

“Maybe it’s because you’re just too young,” Rose said, patting Morgana on the back. “You just haven’t developed an exquisite palate yet! Let me help you! I’ve got the best selections! Come! Come!” She took the goth girl by the hand and led her over to the table. Morgana followed her with some hesitation, and looked back warily at Ella for a moment.

Ella guiltily looked away.

While some of the girls were uncertain, Kim was bolder in comparison. Although she didn’t have much experience with ****, she was still willing to give it a try. And she found that it didn’t taste as bad as she’d feared. But it was difficult to figure out which one tasted best.

Something that was quickly proving to be a common problem for the girls.

“So maybe I just don’t have a very good palate, but these all taste kind of the same,” Dani pointed out, going from one bottle to the next. “Carly, you’re way more of a partier than I am. How do you decide which wine tastes best?”

Carly shrugged. “Honestly? No idea. I just fine one I like.”

She took a sip and smacked her lips together thoughtfully. “…Yep! This one will work.”

Dani nodded. “Cool, I’ll go with that one too, then.”

Carly looked at her in surprise. “Really? You haven’t even tried it yet. Maybe you could find one that suits you better,” she pointed out, offering the bottle to Dani.

Dani pushed it back and shook her head. “Nah, I don’t care about the flavor of wine or anything like that. It’s better this way, because we’ll get the same scores. That way, we’ll still be tied together!” She explained, flashing a smile.

Carly blushed. “Well… when you put it like that…”

“Maybe I should get in on this too,” Marley said with a smirk. “…Nah. I’ll stick with my white wines, thank you very much.” She took a clear sparkling bottle and poured out a sip for herself. “Sylvia, what about you?”

Sylvia was studying the bottles carefully. She stroked her chin and squinted.

“When I was the host, I drank all the time, and my body processed it perfectly fine,” she said thoughtfully. “But now, I’m just an 18-year-old girl. Which puts me in a difficult position. What would taste best…”

Marley didn’t like the way Sylvia was licking her lips.

“Mom…” she groaned, rubbing her forehead in frustration. “Just pick one.”

“Oh? Really?” Sylvia sniffed, raising her eyebrow. “Are you saying that you think I should drink after all, then?”

Marley rolled her eyes. “Just keep going with the event I guess,” she replied.

As for Dawn, she wasn’t really interacting with the other girls. She was just diligently sampling each bottle, almost systematically. She moved so robotically that the other girls were starting to get concerned.

Vivian approached her and put a hand on her shoulder. “Hey, hold on a second,” she said, drawing the other girl’s attention.

“Huh?” Dawn looked up at her, confused. “What?”

“Are you planning to sample every bottle we have here?” Vivian asked, barely suppressing the amusement on her face.

“…Why wouldn’t I?” Dawn asked bluntly, raising her eyebrow. “That’s the most effective way to determine what the best flavor of wine for my palate would be.”

Vivian raised her eyebrow.

“Well… I suppose you have a point there,” she said, smirking. “Carry on then.”

Rose watched the exchange out of the corner of her eye and shook her head. “Oh, ma chaton, you poor thing.”

Nick sighed. It looked like this event would go on for a lot longer than he’d anticipated. But at least the girls seemed to enjoy it- Gina most of all.

Even if Amelia was watching her sharply to make sure that she didn’t “accidentally” drink anymore of the wine.

“I’m serious, it was an honest mistake,” Gina said. “Really, it was.”

“I believe you,” Amelia nodded. “But part of becoming a mature person is to take precautions to ensure that you will not make more mistakes in the future.”

Gina couldn’t really argue with that.

In contrast, Augmented Synthetic Humanoid Assassin was working to ensure no mistakes would occur, just like Dawn. Taking a sip, swishing it in her mouth, and spitting it out. Nick was glad for that, at least, because if she made a “mistake” like Gina, who could say what might happen?

He’d realized earlier that evening that he’d never actually seen her try **** before, and the thought of her doing so petrified him. But it seemed like her prior reticence was gone now, as she dutifully carried out her task.

After a while, Dakota decided that it was time to move on.

“I think we can conclude the festivities here,” she said, tapping her cane on the floor. “Ladies, please select whichever bottle you would like to submit, and then line up to present your choices to the judges for sampling.”

This was the other part Nick was dreading. As he watched the women line up in front of the table with bottle after bottle in hand, he was **** to confront the fact that he didn’t know the first thing about wine.

Forget a refined palate, Nick didn’t even really like beer. Hard cider was his usual drink of choice, and even then, he didn’t tend to drink often. And Mary and Holly would likely not be much help either.

So what exactly was he supposed to do here?

“Quick question,” he said, looking to Dakota before Amelia came up to make the first presentation, “what exactly am I supposed to do as the judge?”

Dakota gave him an “Are you kidding me right now?” kind of look.

“…Taste the wine and then give your opinion on it,” she said bluntly.

Nick rolled his eyes. “Okay, yeah, I get that,” he groaned. “But ranking it from 1 to 10, I mean…”

“It’s all a matter of personal preference,” Dakota cut him off. “So just give it whatever arbitrary score you choose. Come on, Nick, it’s not like this is a challenge for Victory Points or anything. Get in the spirit of things!”

“Yeah, we’re at a party,” Holly pointed out. “Come on, it’s about having fun!”

Nick could see her perspective on that. He nodded reluctantly, and resigned himself to make whatever decisions he’d have to on the flavor.

Sensing Nick was finally ready, Dakota beckoned for Amelia to approach first.

“This is a wine I’ve tried myself,” she said simply, presenting the bottle for Nick’s appraisal. “The 1986 Chateau Lafite Rothschild. It has an energetic and complex flavor. I think you will enjoy it.”

Nick took the bottle and poured himself some. Because Dakota was insisting that he drink (shocker, she wanted him nice and liquored up) he made sure to pour himself a small taste to start. When he brought it to his lips, he found that the flavor was actually pretty nice. Better than the cheap wines he’d tried before.

Maybe my palate is more refined than I thought, he considered. He looked up at Amelia. “Thanks,” he said, handing the bottle back to her so she could go present it to the other judges. “I liked it.”

Amelia regarded him with a nod and moved on to present her wine to the others. Vivian stepped up after her, smiling playfully at him.

The heiress followed Amelia’s bold and classy presentation by presenting Nick with a bottle that looked like it had come from a history book.

“Behold,” she said, holding her head up high, “the Chateau Margaux 1787. One of the most exclusive, resplendent wines in history.”

“What’s so special about it?” Nick questioned. “Other than the age, I mean. Is this thing really that notable?”

Vivian’s jaw dropped. “Notable-?! Nick, this bottle came from Thomas Jefferson’s very own wine collection! …Well, the one I bought at auction a while back was, anyway. A little treat for myself, for when I turned 21. It’s the finest wine you’ll ever drink! Rich with… history, I guess.”

She shrugged. “I figured you’d like something like that. You Americans sure love your rebellious history, eh?” Her eyes twinkled with amusement. She poured the glass for Nick herself, as an added bonus.

When Nick tasted it, though, he couldn’t really tell the difference between this wine, and the one Amelia chose.

He didn’t tell her that, though.

“It’s pretty good,” he said, taking another sip. “Yeah…”

He still had no idea what number he’d give it, though.

This really isn’t a challenge for me. This is definitely more Gina’s kind of thing.

The next girl to come up was Augmented Synthetic Humanoid Assassin. And Nick was rather afraid of what kind of wine the assassin had chosen, before he even saw it. She slammed it down on the table and leered at him with eager eyes, curling her lips up into a smirk.

Nick just barely managed to check the label before she poured it for him. It said “Kings Ridge Red Haute Pinot Noir” but didn’t have a date on the label. Was that a good thing? Or a bad thing? Nick didn’t even know, he just shakily smiled back at the silent woman and took a sip.

He nearly spit it out.

“That, uh… wow, that… that’s strong,” he said, shaking his head. “What kind of wine is that?” He checked the bottle again. “Kings Ridge Red Haute… what does that even mean?”

He looked at the assassin, but obviously she didn’t have anything to add to the conversation. She just smirked at him.

His tongue felt like it was burning. What sort of spices were in that thing?! As good as it had tasted, it came with a strong kick. No wonder she’d chosen it.

Ella was next, and she looked a little shaky.

“I, um… I just grabbed whatever tasted best,” she admitted, giving him some no-name brand that he’d never seen before. He accepted it gladly, and when he tasted it, he was pleasantly surprised. It competed quite well with the fancy bottles of Amelia and Vivian, which was good. That he could be appreciative of.

If the rest of the wines were as simple as this, maybe he could get through this in one piece.

Kim was next, though, and she looked like she had brought some trouble with her.

“Is that… sake?” Nick questioned.

“Dakota didn’t say we were limited to grape wines,” Kim pointed out. “I had Nola grab this for me.”

Dakota looked over at the leprechaun, who glanced away and whistled.

“Sayuri Nigori, I heard it’s pretty good,” Kim said, pouring him a glass of the milky liquid. “I’m not much one for sake myself, though. But I wanted to stand out, you know?”

Nick looked at her in alarm. “Seriously? You don’t even like it, but you wanted to stand out?”

Kim’s eyes gleamed mischievously and she bit her lip.

Well… what was he supposed to do, not drink it?

He took a sip, and found that he actually really liked the flavor.

“You know, this isn’t that bad,” he admitted.

Kim’s face lit up. “Really? You like it?”

“Sake’s not really my thing,” he admitted. “But I think this is pretty tasty actually!” He had no idea how he would compare it to the other wines he would try today, but he definitely appreciated the flavor for sure.

Fortunately, Dani made his next choice easier.

“Carly and I are submitting the same wine,” she said, presenting him with the bottle. “You don’t have to drink it twice though. Just the one time.” She winked at him. “Wouldn’t want you to get too drunk now, would we?”

Nick laughed, appreciating Dani’s perspective. He also appreciated that it was a more casual wine, like the one Ella had chosen. A bright rosé wine.

The irony that Dani and Carly were going with a rosé, and Rose seemed to not be judging by the champagne bottle in her hand, wasn’t lost on him at all.

“Well?” Dani asked. “Want to try it? I’ve never had a rosé before, actually, but Carly said it’s pretty good, so…”

“You should really try it,” Nick urged her. “How about you take a sip, too?”

Dani considered it for a moment, and then nodded. “…Sure, why not?” What was the worst that could happen if she got a little lightheaded?

Nick took a sip first, and passed the glass over to Dani to try it.

“Hey, that’s not bad,” the tomboy noted.

“I think it’s pretty good, too,” Nick agreed. “Good flavor. You two picked well.”

Dani was pretty happy about that. And Carly was smiling too, when she came up with her sister.

“Well, I’m glad you liked Dani’s pick,” Marley said, sighing in relief. “I’d hate to outshine hers. But this one tasted really good. I’m not a wine person, but a Sauvignon Blanc, that’s one of the popular ones, right? Tastes pretty nice.”

Nick took his first sip of a white wine tonight, and found that he enjoyed it quite a bit. Unlike the stronger flavor of the reds, it was more subtle and clear, more subdued. Clean and energizing, almost like Marley herself.

“This was a good pick for you,” he complimented her, taking another sip. “Ever consider using that botany degree to start a vineyard?”

Marley threw back her head and laughed. “Yeah, I don’t think so,” she said, picking up her bottle and making way for the next girl.

Rose walked up with her head held high.

“This,” she said, setting the bottle down gently in front of Nick, “will be the best wine you’ve ever tasted.”

Nick regarded her with a bit of surprise, but also, this was exactly what he expected from Rose.

“…Really,” he said, taking a look at the label. “The best wine I’ve ever tasted?”

“I’m French,” Rose said bluntly. “That should be assurance enough for you.”

“It’s… a 2004 Bollinger R.D. Champagne,” Nick read. It didn’t sound all that famous. “You’re sure?”

Rose’s expression was adamant. “I’m sure,” she said. “You remember our date in Dream Alley, oui?” She pointed out, reminding Nick of the fancy wine they’d shared together.

“Oh, this, this is that champagne?”

Rose blushed and shook her head. “No, this… this is different. Just try it, please.”

Nick nodded, and brought the glass to his lips. He took a sip, and gasped.

“Rose, this…”

“You like it?” Rose asked hopefully.

He nodded. “Yeah, it… it’s really good,” he said. “Really good…” Nick knew he was downplaying it quite a lot. The wine was delicious, it honestly was. He was surprised and not surprised that Rose had made such a great choice.

Rose sighed in relief. “Ah… tres magnifique. This… this was maman’s favorite champagne, you see. I remember her drinking it all the time, when I was little. So I hoped you would like it as well.”

Her eyes grew misty but she blinked away her tears and smiled. “I’m glad… you did.”

With that, she took her bottle back and clutched it preciously to her chest.

Immediately following her was Morgana, who clearly looked nervous to be following Rose after such a passionate statement.

“Um… this… I…” The bottle nearly slipped through her fingers. She passed it over to Nick and shifted from foot to foot.

The wine she presented was another one that Nick had never seen before.

“What’s this?” He asked.

“It’s an Apothic Red,” Morgana said, blushing. “Try it! It’s really sweet!”

Nick took a sip, and reacted with surprise. She was right about that- it was the sweetest wine he’d ever tasted.

“Wow, this, it’s pretty good!” He said, smiling. “Not bad, Morgana. I’ve never had a wine that tasted this sweet before.”

“You like it?” Morgana brightened up. She was relieved.

Dawn trudged up after her, trying to smile, but she clearly looked strained.

“Well… I definitely don’t have a sweet wine,” she said. “Especially after the hard work I put into finding this one. But… I’m confident.”

She held her head up high. “Try it. You’ll like it. I’m sure.”

Dawn seldom proclaimed things like this. Which made Nick perk up and become aware. He took the bottle and checked it.

It was a Chateau Pontet Canet 2021, a very recent wine. And when Nick took a sip, he found that Dawn’s confidence was not misplaced.

“This is amazing!” He said, taking another sip. “You really found a good wine, Dawn.”

Dawn did not display any outward signs of smugness on her face. But her ears twitched, and her tail flicked eagerly behind her back.

“I’m glad you liked it,” she said, taking the bottle back. She moved on to the other judges, and Nick’s attention shifted to Sylvia, who came skipping up with a big smile on her face.

“Have a taste, Daddy!” She said, pouring him a glass before he could even check the label. “You’ll like it, I already know!”

Nick tried to look at the bottle, but she smuggled it away from him before he could.

She smiled brazenly at him while he stared back at her.

“Sylvia…”

“Take a sip, Daddy!” She pushed the glass forward to Nick, insistently.

Sighing, Nick obliged her, and took a swig from the glass. He spit it back out, surprised.

“This… this is-!” His eyes shot over to Morgana, who flinched.

“Apothic Red!” Sylvia said proudly. “The same wine as Morgana. I liked the flavor too, so I decided to submit the same bottle!” She turned and gave Morgana a thumbs-up. “We’ll get the same score that way!”

Morgana smiled a shaky smile and nodded.

“Well… it’s still pretty good,” Nick said, drinking it properly this time, now that he wasn’t caught off-guard. “Nice pick, Sylvia.”

“Thank you, Daddy,” Sylvia hummed, winking at him. She skipped down the line, and then the last woman approached.

Gina held her head up high and smiled.

“Hey there,” she said, presenting Nick with a bottle. “This was the best one I could find. And you know that I know my ****,” she giggled.

Nick nodded. That was definitely true.

“What is it?” He asked, checking the label. It read “California Zinfandel” which sounded familiar, but had no dates or other signals on the label.

He poured himself a glass, and took a drink.

Immediately he cringed.

“Ungh…” he mumbled out, finishing drinking it. “That was… Gina?”

“You like it?” Gina laughed. “I didn’t know they made wines that strong! It’s like 15 or 16% **** by volume, eh?”

Leave it to Gina to find a wine with a ton of ****, he thought, shaking his head in amusement. “It wasn’t that bad. But it was a little strong, don’t you think?”

“Yeah, definitely,” Gina nodded sheepishly. “But it’s wine so that’s classy, though, right?”

Nick wasn’t even sure how to begin to answer that.