Shooting at the walls of heartache, bang, bang

Dakota clapped her hands together cheerfully. “Alright then! Now that we’ve sorted out the rankings from the Popularity Poll and everyone’s gotten their new allotments of BP, we’ll move onto the challenge itself! For this challenge-”

“Wait!” Rose interrupted with a wail.

Dakota’s eye twitched.

She took a deep breath, then slowly exhaled. “…What is it?” She asked, turning to Rose.

“I can’t compete like this!” Rose whined, lifting up handfuls of her hair. The golden tresses tumbled through her fingers as she held them up accusingly. “I can barely walk! My hair, it… it-!”

Dakota just smirked. “You were the one who opposed your short-haired look,” she replied with a smirk, reaching behind her neck to emphasize her own short locks. “Zealously working so hard all week to earn your BP. I’m just giving you everything you wanted!”

Rose fumed. “B-but-!”

“Dakota, this isn’t fair,” Nick asserted. He may be rather lax in his duties as master of the harem, but he wasn’t going to let something like this happen. It would be no better than Kim being **** into a challenge with her massive breasts! “Rose obviously can’t compete with her hair like that, regardless of what the challenge is!”

“That’s right!” Morgana nodded. “Is she supposed to just dangle her hair down like Rapunzel or something?”

Dakota could understand their point. As hilarious of an idea as it was to make Rose go through this challenge with her hair dragging her down (quite literally) especially considering what this next challenge would entail, it was counterproductive to her intentions. Punishing one of the girls for playing into their transformation? It was quite a significant faux pas, as far as being a host went.

Would Rose risk getting more BP next round, if she came in last due to indulging herself this round? Surely not! And considering how several of Rose’s more active transformations revolved around BP, that would be a problem indeed.

“…Very well, then,” she relented. “I suppose we can come to some sort of arrangement.” She drummed her fingers on the head of her cane as she approached the edge of the stage, and crouched down to look at the flustered blonde.

“That being said,” Dakota continued, “it’s not as though I can just disable your transformation. Or cut your hair off early, that simply wouldn’t be fair. But you could always spend some BP to suppress your transformation,” she pointed out.

Rose’s eyes widened. She hadn’t considered that possibility.

“…Of course, if you do that, you could miss out on the harvest… on the other hand, this may be a situation Carly can help out with.”

Carly blinked. She’d been checked out of the discussion for a while, but was suddenly brought back into it. “Wait, me?”

Dakota nodded. “Yes, with your Anime Black transformation. Quite simple, no? Rose can just use Method Acting to copy your transformation, and use it to shorten her hair. It wouldn’t be the first time this round she got around her transformation’s hair restrictions like that.”

Carly nodded. “Hey! Yeah, that could work!”

Rose bit her lip. Dakota was right, that would work…

But I refrained from using Method Acting during my date with Nick specifically so I could have access to it for the challenge, in case I needed to copy a useful transformation! Rose hated the thought of wasting it just to give herself a fighting chance.

…Maybe it was a little selfish of her to want to have her tuxedo cake and eat it too. Rose was acting a bit like a spoiled brat, even she could realize that. Still, it wasn’t like she had much choice at the moment.

She sighed. “Alright, then-”

“That will not be necessary.”

The blonde perked up, surprised. She turned to Amelia, stunned that the taciturn older woman had spoken up in her defense. Amelia had barely said a word all morning, but now here she was, standing up for Rose!

Dakota looked curiously at Nick’s stepmother. “Oh?”

“If Miss Beausoleil’s hair is such an inconvenience for her, then wouldn’t it simply be easier to tie it up, rather than spend a transformation accounting for it?”

Rose and Dakota both stared blankly at the older woman as they processed that. Somehow, neither the guileful blonde or the cunning brunette had considered that idea.

Vivian chuckled in amusement from her seat while Dawn sighed and removed her glasses, massaging the bridge of her nose with her fingers.

“…Okay, but, just hear me out here,” Sylvia interjected, “what about transformation? You know, for the sake of argument. Transformation? Hmm?”

Rose, flustered, let out an awkward laugh. “Um… I… I would like to tie my hair up, but it’s a little…”

A sea of gold pooled in the sand around Rose’s feet. It would be quite the herculean feat to tie up this much hair.

Amelia rose from her seat, running her fingers along her own French braid. “It will be faster if I do it myself.”

Her curt tone may have sounded cold and dismissive, like she didn’t think it was possible for Rose to tie up her hair by herself. But Rose ignored that- just the offer itself was enough to illustrate Amelia’s considerate nature.

She glanced up at Mary, resisting the urge to smile triumphantly at the redhead. Amelia’s offering to braid my hair! Has she ever braided your hair, Mary? No, I don’t think so! Hah!

Dakota, meanwhile, was struggling not to laugh.

“Now then,” she said, clearing her throat, “shall we proceed? While Amelia is busy helping our poor little clumsy blonde, we can move things along and explain the challenge! We’ve certainly wasted enough time already, we don’t want to burn up our daylight, this is going to be a long one!”

“But don’t you control the time on this island?” Marley pointed out.

Dakota ignored her.

“For this next challenge, some of you may find it very familiar! Especially our interrupting non-contestant over there,” she said, giving a sharp look to the brunette.

Marley scowled.

“If you remember my predecessor’s challenge, the one where you girls had to wander all over the island to pick up cards, this may seem rather nostalgic!” Dakota continued. “That-”

“You were in that challenge too, right?” Dani pointed out.

“Yeah, and you got all the Kings!” Gina remembered. “Then Holly and Rose stole ‘em from you! Hah! Classic!”

Dakota’s eye twitched and she tightened her lips into a thin line. “An-ny-way! For this next challenge, you’ll be going all across the island again! Only this time, you won’t be looking for things like cards.” She shook her head and the savage smile returned to her lips. “Oh, Nola?”

“Yes ma’am!” Nola popped onto the scene in a tornado of pink and green, bright eyes flashing with excitement. In her hands, she brandished something that set a few people into a state of panic.

A shiny rifle.

“Eh!?” Ella stiffened in shock. At the same time, Augmented Synthetic Humanoid Assassin leaned in, excited and intrigued.

“Is that a gun!?” Dani exclaimed.

Vivian whistled. “I’m liking this already,” she purred, steepling her fingers under her chin.

“Relax, everyone, it’s a paintball gun,” Dakota assured the girls, hopping down off the stage and confiscating it from Nola. “And it’s been modified to shoot a very particular kind of ammo. Nola, if you would please?”

With a flick of her wrist, Dakota brought out a wide bulls-eye for target shooting.

“On it! You can count on me!” Nola took the target and dashed through the sand. “Where do you want me to put it? Right here?”

“Almost,” Dakota said, lining up her shot and peering through the scope. “Go out a bit further, please, about ten meters… yes, right there. Now, a little to the left…”

“Here?” Nola called, setting up the target and stepping aside.

Dakota nodded slowly. “Right there… perfect.”

“ZIP.”

“Hyeee!”

The leprechaun let out a squeal as Dakota sniped her right in the stomach. A dark splotch spread across the front of her dress and she balled up her fists and trembled, clenching her teeth together.

“Nola!?” Sylvia went pale. “Nola!”

“Relax, she’s fine,” Dakota said, lowering her gun and rolling her eyes. “It’s a paintball gun, I already told you that.”

“I’ve never seen a reaction like that from a paintball gun before,” Dani snapped, narrowing her eyes. She used to play paintball all the time with her high school friends, and while it could sting a bit, Nola… did not look like a sting.

She was practically foaming at the mouth.

“What did you do to her?” Morgana asked nervously. She’d always been too afraid to try paintball because it seemed like it hurt. (And also she didn’t have friends.)

Dakota scoffed. “Weren’t you listening? I said, the ammo is quite particular.” She spun the rifled in her hand and let it rest beside her leg. “Nola, are you alright?”

“I-I’m fine… hah…” Nola panted, stumbling back over to them. Her cheeks were flushed, her eyes were glassy, and sweat glued her hair to her face. “I just… need a sec… to catch my-”

“ZIP. ZIP.”

Two more shots and Nola seized up again. This time she fell to her knees as moans escaped from her lips, and a smile of ecstasy broke her face in two.

This close, everyone could put the pieces together.

“It’s an aphrodisiac,” Kim realized, knowing how this show worked by now. “That’s what’s in those paintballs, right?”

“Precisely!” Dakota’s golden eyes shimmered with glee. The formula in these paintball guns is a special aphrodisiac developed on Harem Hotel, not at all like the lube you’ve been using before. This is quite fast-acting, and even works through clothing! But don’t worry, it isn’t as strong as it appears to be. Nola here is just a pushover, that’s all.”

“Hey!” Nola exclaimed, hopping to her feet. She had made a remarkable recovery. “I was just acting! For the cameras!”

“Yes, I’m sure,” Dakota said dismissively. “Now, back to the challenge itself! I call it, ‘The Dear Hunter’ and it’s quite simple- another spin on an old classic! The Producers wanted me to name it ‘Good Will Cunting’ but as much of a masterpiece as that film may be, it doesn’t actually have anything to do with guns. So I have to override that- Wait, where was I going with this?”

She paused for a moment, realizing she was still supposed to be presenting the challenge and not talking about filmography.

“…Right. Yes. A spin on an old classic!” She cleared her throat. “Across the island, I’ve hidden several weapons just like this!” She raised the gun again.

Nola coughed. “Actually, I was the one who-”

“ZIP.”

“Yeeek!”

“…As I was saying,” Dakota sniffed, “I’ve hidden multiple guns all around the island. Well, not ‘all’ around. I’m sure we can all agree that the biggest problem with my predecessor’s challenge last time was that this island is simple too big for a scavenger hunt of that sort, am I wrong?”

Sylvia sank into her chair and nodded sheepishly. “…Sorry. I was a little eager…”

“It was a fine challenge for what it was,” Dakota said, in a tone that could almost be called complimentary. “But the goal for this challenge is completely different. Instead of exploration, we want to keep things exciting and engaging! And that’s why, I’ve made a tiny little adjustment…”

She raised her cane and the black crystal embedded in the head began to shine.

A rumbling sound echoed off in the distance as the ground beneath them began to shake.

“Wh-whoa!” Rose nearly fell over, ruining Amelia’s efforts with her hair.

“What’s going on?!” Ella cried, clutching the arms of her chair as hard as she could.

“An earthquake?” Kim looked around.

Soon enough, the shaking stopped.

“Sorry about that!” Dakota chirped with a wicked smile. “I was just making a slight adjustment. Now, if you’ll take a look at that path over there, you’ll see a trail leading up to where we’ll begin our little challenge,” she said, beckoning over to a trail that had split open at the edge of the beach, winding through the trees. “I’ve sectioned off a part of the island, as the ‘boundary’ of this little game. All the weapons are hidden somewhere within that boundary for you to discover. And don’t worry, there’s no sneaking out of bounds on this one- I’ve taken care of that. Though you might be surprised where the boundary extends to!”

“So we can’t go out of bounds then, that’s good,” Dani nodded. The last thing she wanted was for someone to sneak out. And it sounded like the hotel was off-limits, which was good.

“You’ve been dancing around it for a while, but the challenge is basically we’re going to shoot at each other, right?” Kim asked, scowling.

Dakota nodded. “In a word, yes! You girls will be searching the area for as many weapons and stocks of ammunition as you can find! Once you’ve gotten stocked up, then the fun can begin! You’ll be chasing each other all through the woods, trying to hunt each other down with our patented aphrodisiac paintballs! Doesn’t that sound like a blast?”

“The paintballs that make us cum whenever we’re hit with them,” Morgana squeaked, not liking the sound of that.

Dakota smirked. “Actually, they don’t,” she replied. “And that is the best part.”

Dani raised her eyebrow. “Oh?”

“So wait, it’s not just about making them all cum?” Nick asked. He’d been listening quietly while Dakota explained everything, but he felt compelled to speak up.

Dakota nodded. “No, these paintballs may have aphrodisiacs inside of them, but not necessarily enough to bring you to orgasm on the spot. Unless of course you happen to be very susceptible to cumming, with a hair trigger, of course.”

Holly drooled.

“…And that’s precisely why it works so well as a challenge!” Dakota twirled her gun again. “Because you see, a contestant isn’t eliminated from the challenge just by being hit, no, no, no. You could be hit ten times, a hundred times, and it won’t matter one bit! …As long as you can keep yourself from cumming, of course.”

And there it was, the other shoe. A hush fell over the crowd.

“…So it’s an edging contest, then.” Gina bluntly put to words what everyone was thinking. “We’re trying to shoot each other with aphrodisiac bullets, and every time we get hit, we get a little hornier. And eventually if you get hit enough times, you orgasm, and then you’re out?”

“Exactly correct, Gina!” Dakota nodded with a gleeful smile. “I certainly hope no one is filling pent up right now, otherwise you might be starting this challenge with a bit of a disadvantage!”

Dawn gulped. More and more of her dream last night was starting to make sense. I’m so glad I took dream-Nick’s advice and got myself off so many times this morning. If I was still that wired… I don’t even want to think about what could happen!

“This is such an amazing challenge, Dakota!” Sylvia gushed, blown away by how creatively sexy her creator’s ideas always were.

“Yes, I thought you would like it,” Dakota beamed, putting aside her apathy for Sylvia momentarily to bask in the girl’s praise. “A nice, sexy challenge to induct our new contestants and get them all worked-up and ready to compete with one another!”

“Okay, I understand the challenge on paper,” Nick said, biting his lip, “but isn’t it a little unfair? I think a few people here might be at a bigger advantage than others.”

Nobody needed to wonder who he was talking about. Several people glanced over at Augmented Synthetic Humanoid Assassin, who was taking in every word Dakota was saying with rapt attention.

Dakota sighed. “That’s the nature of Harem Hotel, Nick,” she said gently. “Sometimes, challenges may be unfairly weighted towards one contestant over the others. Do you think Dani and Carly wanted to do the cooking challenge? Or that Holly wanted to run a lap around the beach?”

“Hey! We came in second!” Holly protested.

“Yes, because of me,” Dakota reminded her.

“Because you had me rig it in your favor,” Sylvia pointed out. “Otherwise you would have come in first.”

Dakota ignored that.

“The point is,” she said instead, “yes, maybe this is a challenge where I’m giving a bunch of guns to a trained assassin, and you have to not get shot up by her. But every challenge comes with pluses and minuses!”

Nick thought that sounded like pretty tenuous logic.

“I don’t mind!” Vivian said, smiling. “I think I could take her on in a shooting match!”

Augmented Synthetic Humanoid Assassin turned to Vivian and narrowed her eyes sharply. A silent declaration of war had been issued against the heiress.

“Now now, save it for when we actually get to the battlefield,” Dakota coaxed them. “No point in ripping each other apart here and now! There will be plenty of time for that later- it’s a big arena I’ve set up for you, after all! Plenty of spots where weapons are stashed, and plenty of places to hide.”

Dawn’s ears twitched. Hearing that triggered something in the back of her mind, something she hadn’t considered until just now.

“Wait a second,” she interjected, frowning. “I just thought of something… doesn’t this challenge seem a little overly-convoluted to anybody else?”

Gina frowned. “No, not really,” she said, shaking her head.

Dawn looked at her. “…Gina, what does ‘convoluted’ mean?”

“Um… sexy?”

“Haaah…” With an exasperated sigh, Dawn removed her glasses and massaged the bridge of her nose. “What I mean is, it feels like you’ve made this more complicated than it needs to be, Dakota.”

“Oh, have I?” Dakota purred, leaning back against the stage with a catlike smile that only reinforced Dawn’s suspicions.

The cat girl scowled. “Yes. If it was just about us hunting each other down, why would you hide the weapons and ammo all over the battlefield?” She questioned. “Why not just give us all a rifle with unlimited ammo? It seems way too unnecessary.”

“Yeah, now that you mention it, that’s a good point,” Carly agreed.

Dani nodded too. “Yeah, in regular paintball, you start with the guns. Why make us find our own? If we can’t find one, we’re just screwed over.”

Amelia frowned. “It is curious,” she said, doing another braid in Rose’s hair.

Dakota tapped her chin. “Weeellll… okay, look. I know I said that you have to go shooting at each other with paintballs, but… you really don’t.”

“Huh!?” Kim stammered.

“Then… why?” Morgana just looked confused.

“Remember the method of elimination!” Dakota said confrontationally. “An orgasm. You don’t need a paintball gun loaded with aphrodisiacs to do that.”

That… was another good point.

“Wait, so…” Morgana’s eyes widened as she realized the insinuation there.

“So we don’t actually need to shoot anyone?” Carly asked. “We just have to make them cum!”

“Even better!” Sylvia chirped.

“Ah, I think I could get behind that,” Gina nodded.

Dani sighed. “You know, normally I would be against forcing orgasms, but everybody else seems to be in support of this, so I guess it’s what we have to do.”

“Oh, and with that in mind, one other thing,” Dakota said, clearing her throat. “For the sake of fairness, and good gameplay, for the entirety of the challenge the shop will be closed. No purchasing chastity belts for yourself to bend the rules, no upgrading someone’s libido, or downgrading your own. I want a clean match, everyone, not a game where money buys the outcome. …Vivian.”

“What?! I want to use a gun!” Vivian exclaimed. Even though, as a gun enthusiast, shooting at another person was a complete nonstarter (it wasn’t like she was an American) she still wanted a chance to show off her prowess.

Kim doubled over laughing, her concerns momentarily set aside at the heiress being so blatantly called out like that.

“I’m just teasing,” Dakota smirked. “No, you can use any other tricks at your disposal to bring the other contestants to orgasm! And the one who goes the longest without cumming will be our winner! Now doesn’t that sound like a fun idea?”

Nick had to admit… as twisted of a challenge as this sounded (never mind how questionable forcing another person to orgasm was) Dakota had really outdone herself with this one.

Not everyone was thrilled, though. Ella shivered with worry, not liking this one bit, and Morgana looked a little conflicted herself. Almost like she was considering something, and weighing whether or not she could do it. Rose seemed nervous, and Amelia looked as ambivalent as ever, but Nick thought he saw a note of concern on her face.

And then there was Dawn, who still didn’t look satisfied.

“…No, that doesn’t explain it,” she said, rising to her feet and shaking her head. “That still doesn’t explain why we wouldn’t just start out with guns, unless the randomness of whether or not we can find one is a factor. And it is, isn’t it?”

Dakota turned to her and leaned forward on her cane, her eyes shining with malice. “Why, my dear sweet pussycat… of course it is.”

She pulled back, rocking on her heels. “Part of the fun of this challenge is the search! Trying to find guns and ammo to hunt down your opponents! And it’s precisely that reason I’ve hidden them all over the place. You see… it won’t just be guns like this one,” she clarified, holding up her rifle.

Dawn’s stomach sank. Just as she’d feared.

“Wait, so… there are different kinds of guns hidden?!” Vivian’s eyes widened as she processed that information.

A wide smile stretched across Dakota’s face. “Why of course!” She laughed. “It wouldn’t be nearly as enjoyable if everyone had the same model. No, we’ve hidden rifles, shotguns, dinky little pistols, all manner of weaponry across the battlefield, custom-designed to make the target cum! What you find and how well you can use it, that’s up to luck of course! Better not overlook any gems, lest your foes use them on you!”

And with that ominous warning, Dakota raised her cane. Nothing happened, but the insinuation was clear.

“Now, shall we head to the arena, and begin our little challenge?” She asked, looking out over the crowd of concerned and excited faces.