Check out the TV screen in the sitting area

You sit yourself down on one of the sofas and relax.{if fart=true} Feeling a fart brewing in your guts, you happily push it out of your anus.

“Somebody’s making himself at home,” comments Mary cheekily. You inhale deeply, savouring the smell of your flatus.{endif} You flip your wrist and, because you’re facing the screen, you see there’s an option on your wrist-screen to operate the TV. There are lots of channels to choose from - in fact, lots of categories of channels - as well as streaming services and the ability to play radio, music and podcasts. Not really wanting to watch anything in particular - more curious about what TV is like in this world - you flick through a few different categories at random.

The first channel you try is a general entertainment channel, and it’s showing a daytime game show. The host introduces two contestants - a man and a woman - and invites them to greet each other. They do, of course with a kiss and a grope, after which the man and the host exchange comments about the size of her tits and the shape of her butt. The host asks about their hobbies - he mentions gardening, she talks about spending time with her boyfriend and going for walks in a local park where, she says, she meets a lot of interesting people. The quiz itself then begins and you soon realise how little you know about this world - the questions about books, songs, TV shows, and popular culture in general all talk about things you don’t recognise. You feel a pang of sadness and disappointment - you used to be good at pub quizzes, with decent general knowledge, and now you find everything has changed.

The next channel shows a cookery show and, aside from the body shape and revealing clothing of the female presenter, it seems a bit more familiar. Some of the ingredients and equipment she uses are new to you but the general format is comforting. You start to wonder what this world has to offer in terms of fruit and vegetables, herbs and spices, and other ingredients; but you hope there are some familiar things too. The presenter bends over to put the pie she is making into an oven and the camera duly zooms in on her butt instead of the pie.

“Ooh, she’s got a nice bum,” comments Mary.

Next up is a sports channel, showing women playing something that looks like a cross between netball and volleyball; the court is divided into sections by multiple nets, each section containing two players from each team, and hoops at each end of the court. The women jump as they try to direct the ball into a neighbouring section towards the hoop they are aiming for. The camera shows a lot of bouncing going on, pretty much none of it being done by the ball itself. One shot shows two women from opposite teams jumping for the ball at the same time; one player jumps sooner and higher than the other, her opponent missing the ball as a result and finding her head buried in the others’ large breasts on the way down to the ground. The first player cuddles her opponent's head in her bosom for a few seconds more after they reach the floor, before they separate, both with good-natured smiles on their faces.

A children’s TV channel is up next and you don’t expect to find anything titillating here. However of course the adult presenter’s bodies and clothing leave little to your imagination - as Phil had explained, it’s just the normal way people dress here. They talk about a show that’s coming up on the channel, showing a clip of it - it looks like a show for younger kids with cartoony, costumed characters. There’s a family of characters and while much of the action focuses on the kids, the adults of course are designed to reflect what adults look like in this world.{if fart=true} There is also a lot of farting involved.{endif} You decide to hastily move on.

The next channel is showing a pop music video. To say the costumes and dance moves are raunchy would be an understatement. You catch some of the lyrics and they’re so littered with double entendres and implied meaning, there’s little doubt the song is about sex even if it doesn’t say so explicitly.

Then there’s a “classic films” channel, showing some black-and-white romantic thing with sweeping orchestral music in the background as a couple snog, grope, and start undressing as the scene fades to black and the closing titles appear.

Then you spot there’s an actual category for genuine porn, with several general channels along with programming catering for every kink you could think of and more besides, all broadcasting free-to-air, 24 hours a day. At least you assume days are 24 hours long here. You decide to leave exploring that until later and turn the TV off for now.