Samuel Jonathan Steele

Chapter 1.

A new day begins.

"Puddin, Puddin, its time to wake up Puddin!". "Come on Puddin! Today's the big day its time to wake up!".

"Damn it H.A.R.L.S.! Let me sleep, I had a rough night. Another hour of sleep won't kill anyone!". I try to rollover and go back to sleep when I hear a very familiar swooshing sound of a panel opening up above my head. "DAMN IT H.A.R.L.S.! IF YOU TURN ON THAT DAMN SPRINKLER SYSTEM AND RUIN ANOTHER CUSTOM MADE BED, I'M GOING TO RIP OUT YOUR CONTROL MODULE AND PUT IT IN THE METAL SHREDDER!!!!".

"Aww! Come on Puddin, less grouchy, grouchy and more wakey, wakey.".

I know that H.A.R.L.S. is right and it's time for me to get up. Because today is a special day. Hopefully, by the end of this personal mission I'm going on, I will have been able to get what I'm looking for.

So with that being said, I begrudgingly get out of bed. I walk into my bathroom for a much needed shower in order to wake myself up. I get into the custom made shower and turn the water on. It is at this point that H.A.R.L.S. decided to prank me. She decided to change the water temperature from what I have set on, to cold.

"DAMN IT H.A.R.L.S.! YOU BETTER CHANGE THE WATER TEMPERATURE BACK, BEFORE I GET OUT OF THIS SHOWER AND RIP OUT YOUR ENTIRE DAMN SYSTEM AND TAKE YOU BACK TO A.I. HOME DEPOT!!!!".

"Oh come on Puddin! I thought you could use a little cold shower to clear your head. Both of them that is. Hehe, Hehe!". She quickly switches the water temperature back to what I had it set on.

I shake my head and chuckle at H.A.R.L.S. antics. As much as I give her grief, I really can't stay mad at her.

While taking my shower I think about how for the longest time I've had a thing for Harley Quinn. So three years ago when my home was being built it was a no brainer for me. I decided to get the Holographic Altruistic Robotic Learning System or H.A.R.L.S. for short, as an A.I. home operating system, that had it's personality based off of a scan of Harley Quinn.

The Dr. Robotnik that came from A.I. Home Depot to install her into my 4 bedroom, 4 bath home constantly assured me that they got most of the bugs out of her operating systems. To be honest though I think they lied to me! As a thank you for my purchase A.I. Home Depot even threw in a custom voice alteration for me.

They changed H.A.R.L.S. voice from a shrill, squeaky voice, to something that is similar to Jessica Rabbit's sexy, sultry, husky seductive voice. Because that is the one thing that has always annoyed me about most animated Harley Quinn's is the animation studios always seem to use a voice actress that has a shrill, squeaky voice.

I really wanted to get a Harley Quinn of my own. But, there's always been reasons as to why I haven't done so. The first reason is, I was always busy. Up until two years ago, I was pretty much working 24/7, 365 days a year. Before I retired I worked as a Bounty/Character Hunter. I would often have to go into worlds hunting criminals, rouge or bad characters, and sometimes even rouge family members. I pretty much spent all my waking hours hunting bounties, or rescuing stray family members. Only coming back out to Earth Prime long enough to collect my bounty, and usually start my next job.

The second reason is as I said, I didn't have a true "home" for a while. When I was in between jobs, I usually slept in a room in the back of my office. It's not like I didn't have a place for a home, I own a huge chunk of land way outside of the city. That land up until I started building my home, was primarily flat, except at the far end of the property that had a hill with a huge tree on it, and three granite headstones sitting under that tree.

The final and most important reason to me anyways, is that I felt like for Harley Quinn's to thrive they needed constant attention, and sometimes some of them also needed 24/7 supervision to help keep a lot of their chaos and craziness in check. But, now that I'm retired I should of been able to get myself a Harley Quinn, unfortunately as of now, that wasn't going to happen.