Run like hell, and call the cops once you're outside.

You climb out of the bathtub and bolt past Dr. McKenzie as she convulses helplessly. You grab your jacket, cell in the pocket, and run out the door and down the steps to the street. From a nearby doorway, you dial 911 and explain that a woman tried to shoot you in your home. It's only then that you become painfully aware of your raging erection. It's all that you can do to fight off the urge to whack off while you're waiting.

Two police cars arrive in a few minutes, and you show yourself to direct them inside. You hear a commotion from within, and two officers soon emerge, dragging a helpless Dr. McKenzie between them. Apparently she sprang from your apartment door and attacked one of the officers, seemingly trying to **** him, until the other used his stun gun on her. They question you, and while you identify Dr. McKenzie as someone who works for your employer, and explain that you managed to blind her with a can of body spray, you profess to know of no reason why she would attack you. The police take her and her weapons, and leave.

You note that it was probably for the best that no female officers were dispatched. Your apartment reeks of the AXE, and there seems to be a hint of it in the air even after you scrub the bathroom floor with bleach.

The police find that the bullets that killed Fanshaw were fired by McKenzie's gun, which bears only her fingerprints. She's currently institutionalized after alternating between raving, violent fits and catatonic trances while in police custody. She reportedly spends most of her days now screaming at the walls, asking orderlies for an axe, and masturbating. If she ever recovers, she'll face trial for ****.

You and Tami move in with Loni and Linda in their spacious apartment. Your old apartment is taken over by your friend, Jake, who can't figure out why chicks that he brings home always seem to get horny after using the bathroom. With your rent and commuting savings (after the purchase of a king-sized bed that you shoehorn into the larger of the bedrooms) you can afford to take evening classes, and hope to eventually qualify for a better job. In the meantime you're quite happy having Loni call you her "Stud", Linda her "Master", and Tami her "Fuckbuddy". You're not sure how long this arrangement can last, but you still have a box full of possibilities in the trunk of your old clunker.