Rob

Thomas couldn’t help giving his mom sidelong glances at dinner that night.

“OK champ, spill it, what’s up?” Mary asked.

“What was what you did when you gave us snacks about?” Thomas got the nerve to ask.

Mary laughed, “Oh so you noticed did you? I was just flirting.”

“We all noticed mom,” Thomas said.

“I see, so when a girl does that what do you do? I mean what should you do which is not retreat to your room, shut the door, and play games?” Mary asked.

“Even if she’s your mother?” Thomas asked.

“Let’s leave that little detail out of it for the moment. Pretend I’m not,” Mary said.

She got up, grabbed a serving bowl, and stood over Thomas and pretended to serve him like she did that afternoon with her breasts close to his face.

“So what do you do?” Mary asked.

“I take it grabbing at them is not the right answer,” Thomas replied.

“Usually something that direct will get you slapped and break the mood,” Mary said. “Except when large amounts of **** or **** are involved anyway. It’s flirting, not a direct invitation for sex. The woman is showing interest in you, you need to show interest back.”

“Which I do by?…” Thomas asked.

“Hoo, boy, didn’t your dad teach you anything about relating to women?” Mary replied.

“Er, no,” Thomas said.

“OK, I think you have a girl in one of your classes, business computing, her name is Susan, light brown shoulder length hair, slender build,” Mary said.

“Oh yeah, I know her, I was thinking of asking her out,” Thomas said.

“You need to think faster, your dad is dating her,” Mary said.

“What?!!? No way!” Thomas protested.

“Way, she’s an intern at where he works,” Mary said.

“Well of course, he has a job, and a car, and money…” Thomas protested.

“And wrinkles and a 44 year old dad bod,” Mary concluded for him. “He also has a way with women, you ought to pay attention to how he operates next time you are with him.

“Like he is going to do that around me,” Thomas snorted.

“He did it around me, and I was married to him,” Mary pointed out. “Watch how he interacts with the counter person at the fast food place, the waitress at the restaurant, the cashier at the grocery store. Don’t say anything, just observe. The guy is constantly on the make.”

Thomas thought about it. “OK, do you have any words of wisdom for me in the meantime?”

“Make it sound like you are interested in somebody, who they are, what they want, what makes them feel good. Compliment them, but don’t make it icky, ‘Nice tits’ is not the way to go about it. Make them want to be around you.”

“Sounds like a good way to get into the ‘friend zone’” Thomas said.

“Yeah, well there has to be some animal magnetism there too, but that’s for a later lesson. Let’s just get your foot in the door for now,” Mary said.