Resist

You think you might lose someone who is very important to you, and the fear of that is enough to overcome your instinct to seek out pleasure. So when your stop comes you step out the door and see the blonde's disappointed face before the doors close and the train speeds its way down the track.

You make your way out of the station and begin making your way home, a breeze goes through the street making you and the few people making their ways up and down the sidewalks shiver. You rub your palms together and find you cant get warm at all like the temperature is going down a degree every city block you go. By the time you finally make it back home you can see your own breath.

Sitting outside on the curb for trash pick up is the wreck of your old bed, what parts that aren't broken disassembled into a neat pile by the bins. The stained and ruined mattress rolled into a bundle and bound with electric tape leans against it. You look at it for a second before making your way up the steps and inside.

As you cross the threshold into your home you begin to warm up, and as you are taking off your shoes your mother pokes her head around a corner and her face lights up. She makes her way over to you and gives you a tight hug, "Oh I've missed you all day." your mother said pressing herself against you. She gives you a deep kiss on the lips and slowly pulls away, "My goodness baby your freezing let mommy warm you up." she whispers in your ear before pressing herself up against you and returning her lips to yours. You let her do it but you don't have the energy to give much back right now. She pulls away and looks at you concerned resting her palm on your cheek, "Honey what is wrong?" You respond with a simple "Im sorry I am just not feeling it right now." She looks sad and worried for a moment when a loud bang from upstairs makes you both look up.

She doesn't take her eyes from the ceiling as she stares up at the general direction of the thump and says, "That must be your father he bought a replacement bed and has been trying to get it together since he got back from work." She turns herself back to you, "Sweetheart would you mind giving him a hand, while you do that I will get to work on dinner ill make something to cheer you up okay?" You nod and she smiles a bit and kisses you again before sauntering back down the hall and into the kitchen as you make your way upstairs.