Reluctantly ... at first.

Dear Diary, (May 23rd, once again safely in my room)

As I said, this was the first time I have used my mouth to pleasure a man, and it was most certainly I did it like this, from my knees. With Mr. Thornton standing over me and me licking and sucking on his member I felt like I might indeed be a fancy girl sent to his room for his sexual pleasure. I imagine that my mother must have done this regularly, in fact she probably still does to keep her patrons happy. It did not take long for Mr. Thornton's manhood to become fully erect once again and when he placed his hand on my head it was clear that seeing me like this was as exciting for him as it was humiliating for me.

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“Damn that's good.” I remember feeling a moment of pride when Mr. Thornton grunted in satisfaction, but before I could pretend that this was in any way something that I wanted, he made clear his true beliefs. “Your complexion might be almost light enough to pass as a white, girl, but the way your fat negroid lips wrap around my penis is all the evidence a court would need to see that you are, in your blood, a fancy girl bred to please her master.”

I wanted to scream in protest. I swear it! But instead, I let him use my mouth in that most demeaning manner. As he pushed deeper and deeper into my mouth, he called me his 'nigga whore' and 'colored bitch' again and again making it clear to me what he thought about my claim to Havenhall and my place here in Charleston.

“Was your mother a good cock-sucker like you?” Thornton asked during one of the brief moments of relief he allowed me. “Did she teach you everything she knew?” Thankfully I didn't have to answer, because my mouth was once again full of his meat, but Thornton was taken with this new thought. “If I had stayed a few more days in Philadelphia, do you think I could have had her blowing me like this?” A second hand joined the other on my head and I could tell that he was getting closer to his climax as he imagined being with my mother.

“The infamous Contessa DiFlorentini on her knees and blowing my white dick like she once serviced her Master.” I can only imagine that it is this thought of him together with my mother that made Mr. Thornton lose control. With his hands firmly gripping my hair I had little choice but to swallow the semen that flooded my mouth. It was the first time swallowing like this for me and I found that while I should have been disgusted and mortified that I liked the taste and the felling of his hot seed flowing down my throat.

It had not been the first time that one of my lovers had compared me to my mother like that. Even though I was almost twenty years younger than her and just as beautiful, I knew in my heart that most of my lovers were only with me because they were not invited into my mother's bed. Despite it all, I found that my sex was once again throbbing with desire, and I wished for nothing more than for Mr. Thornton to place me on my back and take me again as I writhed and moaned under him.

What is becoming of me ...