Really Stressing Peter

Written in collaboration with Cross C

One week later, and Spider-Man was frantic to be far away from his house.

“Gotta get out of that house…” Peter panted, swinging through the high rise city buildings was usually the best way to clear his head…

But it wasn’t working today.

Poor Peter Parker was backed up. A week was a long time for an eighteen year old like him, especially one where his aunt would NOT LEAVE HIM ALONE.

This week was perhaps the most sexually painful of his life. May had suddenly decided that clothing in the house was mostly ‘optional’, and was now walking around with as little clothing as she possibly could.

At first it was easy to deal with. Sweatpants and a loose tanktop. A bit lewd, but after working so much she was allowed to lounge in things that were baggy. It wasn’t like Peter was looking at her lack of bra, he just happened to see when she bent forward to pick up the remote after a long Netflix binge. The way her breast dangled down-

“GAH!” Peter yelped while flying through some pigeons, “Stupid sexy May!”

It had only gotten worse from there. May had gotten rid of the sweatpants for green/purple yoga pants and no panties. Her excuse was a lack of clean laundry, but that really shouldn’t have explained the camel toe that seemed to follow him around the room. The way May would lean down on the couch and hook one leg over the back… so that the material stretched tightly against her crotch… well, it was certainly making his crotch tighten as well while they watched their Netflix.

Oh, and speaking of Netflix, guess when May wanted to watch?

Every time Peter was about to jerk off.

It was uncanny. Do all parents know instinctively when to barge in and insist on doing an activity together at the worst possible time? May was usually cool with letting Peter have his ‘alone time’ but for some reason she couldn’t pick up on his obvious clues. Even a sock on the door meant NOTHING anymore. Practically dragging him out to sit on the couch with him and watch whatever show she wanted to binge that day.

Peter had discovered a while back that his unique biology after the spider bite had changed some of the rates of replenishment his body went through. On the upside: his red and white blood cell count was higher, which meant healing wounds was easier... on the downside he HAD noticed his sperm seemed to replenish quicker than the average man. It meant he needed to relieve himself more, so this week was making him ACHE down there, all because of that darn aunt...

One day, as she’d decided to just wear only the tiniest booty shorts during Stranger Things, Peter told his aunt that he had to go ‘do homework’ while keeping a pillow over his crotch.

Her response? “Oh yeah, I got a call saying your homework is starting to get away from you.” She calmly lowered an eyebrow at the frustrated boy, “Maybe you’re Spider-Manning too much recently. I’ll be popping in every so often to check you’re doing homework properly, k?”

And so, in an attempt to use a homework excuse to relieve himself… Peter spent all night actually doing homework. Which, to be fair, is a reasonable use of his time. But he still went to bed feeling harder than he should...

And then she woke him up in a really weird way.

In a sudden flash, just as Peter was enjoying his one late morning start to lie in, his covers were ripped from his body.

“Rise and shi-! Oh my!” May gasped at the large tower her nephew was sporting under the covers.

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING GET OUT OF HERE!”

He was shielding everything, but all she did was tilt her head curiously, “Is that how you detect danger? That, uh, Peter tingle?”

A quick exasperated sound came from his mouth before he continued to yell at her, “DON’T CALL IT THAT! AND NO!!!”

“Alright, well up and at em! You promised you’d go running with me this morning!” She smiled while leaving his room. A half-assed promise he’d made while trying to avoid staring at the massive cleavage in front of him the day prior. Yet another reason he couldn’t get rid of any of this pent up feelings inside of him…

And after a long morning run with a woman who had apparently FORGOTTEN how to wear underwear that could stop her breasts flopping about, he was now worried that the breeze up here was going to set him off. He really never thought his boner would be so annoying. The thought of fighting crime with it was becoming less of an unfounded fear and more of a horrible reality…

So this was plan-B. Landing on a rooftop with absolutely zero access and no higher buildings to look down on him from. Tucked under the lip of an old building with a gargoyle on it, he knew that the likelihood of anyone spotting him down here was pretty much zero.

“Sorry New York.” He sighed while whipping out his phone and dropping his pants, “Spider-Man needs a little alone time that his Aunt refuses to give him.”

As soon as he turned on his phone, a picture of his aunt in lingerie was right there on the screen.

“WHAT THE FUCK?!” He yelped, realising it was a picture sent to his and May’s text chat with a message underneath ’whoopsie, didn’t mean to send that to you, sorry!’ underneath. He grumbled in both horror and frustration. At least she ACTUALLY mean to send that to him, but now he’d seen his aunt in black lacy undergarments. Ones that pushed her tits up to look extra “NO! Bad thoughts GO AWAY!” He hissed in anger, spamming message after message to make it go up the page and away from his screen before replying ‘just don’t do it again’.

With that… one last interruption out of the way, Peter quickly went to the internet. The sounds of New York still blazing around him, but with this one tiny corner that only a spider could reach, he felt at least a little safe in clicking on some good ol vanilla guy on girl action.

’Hot Aunts in Your Area want YOU!’

"...fucking adverts..."