Quinara's story

(CONTENT WARNING: this chapter is going to contain mentions of **** and I feel like it warrants a warning. If you are someone who is easily upset by this kind of content feel free to skip this chapter, I won't be going into graphic detail but it's more heavy subject matter and I just don't want anyone to get sucker-punched or to upset anyone with my writing.)

"Ok" I say with a nod giving her my full attention, "I can't stay in orc territory, because my clan could find me. My clan, my brother and" she hesitates clearly not wanting to say this next part but she does relent "and my husband." My eyes widen, Quinara was married? I had no idea, I mean she didn't wear a wedding band or ever mention this before so how was I to know but my head spins at this revelation. "Y-you", "I know how that sounds but please hear me out, I can explain but it's a long story" she cuts me off panicked as if I would abandon her instantly from this news. I had no idea what to make from this, but I knew one thing for certain, I was going to hear her out before passing any judgement, "yeah of course" I say letting her continue.

Quinara breathes a sigh of relief that I was at least willing to hear her story, "oh gods where do I even start... Ok so you know I'm a fighter? I always was, growing up I lived for the circle an" "Circle?" I ask cutting her off, I didn't want to do this but I had no idea what that even meant, she looks at me "oh yeah of course" she states realising that my sheltered past meant I needed some context. "So the circle is an orcish tradition, we draw a circle in the dirt then two orc go in unarmed and brawl until one submits or one gets thrown from the circle" she explains "we do it for everything, settling arguments, relieving stress, even entertainment it's something universal across all orc clans, from the Ahi Tock clans to my clan the Grug clan".

Now that I was caught up on the orc customs she continues where she left off, "I loved the circle, I was good at it, only two people when I was kid could beat me my older brother Semta and his best friend Zihan and even they couldn't do it consistently. But I could never be a real fighter in anyone's eyes because I was a girl, my father was the chieftain and I was one of the best fighters yet all I heard was how great Semta and Zihan were." I did wonder where she was going with this and how this would lead to her being married but for now I was content to listen. "So when orcs mature, the circle becomes gendered. Girls fight as all orcs do but they can't fight the men, it's an insult" she spits passionately "I was a better fighter than most of the men but I was expected to never fight a fair fight, not only that but while the boys got trained in combat I was **** to learn about child raising and how to clean blood from the men's weapons." It was clear how much this irked her, "I couldn't live like that I needed to prove myself, I knew I was a fighter. So I went to the one orc I knew I could trust, Gerak an old orc but one with experience and one who saw in me what I saw in myself. He trained me every night for months" she says "he trained you with the war hammer?" I ask, "war axe, I didn't get the war hammer till later runt" She answers.

"Once I was trained I went to my father and showed him what I could do, I knew if he saw my talents he would have to relent, and he did. He let me join the fighting ****, the clan wasn't happy but my father was our leader and his word was law." I stare in awe at her dedication, "your brother must have been pleased" I reply to her. Quinara shakes her head "no. He wasn't. Him and Zihan were the most vocal against it, it stung but I thought I could still change their minds, I just needed to prove myself again. I was naive and stupid"

Quinara takes a deep breath steeling herself "after my father passed Semta took up the mantle of chieftain, his first act was marrying me to Zihan. It was a logical move, Zihan was his right hand and as chieftain his word went." I nod silently this was something our cultures shared, weddings for politics at the behest of power without regard for the feelings of the woman being married off was a story I was intimately familiar with. "I felt it was spiteful, but it was for the good of the clan and well I couldn't refuse, so I agreed to marry Zihan." She takes a deep breath "people think orcs are monsters, I disagree but Zihan? I can think of no better word to describe him, his wedding gift to me was making me watch as they melted my war axe down. He then forbade me from fighting. Not just fighting in the main **** but all fighting, it was like I was a leper no one would dare go against his word, no circle, not even with women I was expected to just live like a pacifist. Those eight months were the worst of my life, he took what I loved most from me and I was just expected to bear it." I put my hand on her shoulder "I'm sorry he sounds awful" I say sympathetically

Quinara laughs but there's no joy in it "you don't even know the worst of it runt..." She looks at the window a pained expression on her face as she relives the memory, I had never seen her so upset. "One day when my brother and Zihan were out hunting the clan was attacked, rival clan wanted to hit us while we were weak. I couldn't just sit back people were dying, MY people, I could fight. Not only that I was the best we currently had by far, I got involved I wrenched a war hammer from one of the attackers and killed him with his own weapon. With my help we drove them back, I remember I thought this was it. They would come back see what I done and this was how I'd prove myself... I was a fool, Zihan only saw that I disobeyed him, he took his hunting knife and gave me this" Quinara says on the verge of tears putting her hand to her abdomen where her scar was. Her voice cracks but she continues "he cut deep, I was in the healers tent for weeks, I remember my brother visited me and I told him, I told him what he did to me. To his sister." Quinara was now crying with a mixture of rage and pain "and he told me I shouldn't have disobeyed, that Zihan had forbade me and I didn't listen. My brother never visited again, and I spent every night in the healers tent alone, hoping that Zihan wouldn't come finish the job." Her tears stream down her face, "the second I had enough strength I grabbed my war hammer, ran into the night and never looked back. Zihan isn't the kind of guy to let go, I can't ever go back. I can't" she says breaking down. My heart bleeds for her and I pull her in for a hug letting her get out her emotions, I could understand why this wasn't a story she told anyone.