Professor, of course.

Erica crinkled her nose. The adorable expression looked alien on her face. "She's so young! You think she could be a professor?"

Ross cleared his throat. "Uh, with golems it doesn't really matter. They just look a certain age."

Erica slapped her forehead. "Duh! But do you think she'll notice that she's way too young to be a professor? I mean, she looks barely old enough to drink! Won't that be weird?"

Andrew snickered a little. "I think the script keeps them from noticing if they're in a body that's incompatible with their role."

"Cool!" Erica exclaimed. "Well, do it! I wanna meet sexy Doogie Howser."

Andrew shrugged and stepped forward. He placed the script on the thing's tongue and performed the ritual. As usual, it closed its mouth, straightened up, and reanimated. She looked around the room, sizing up the situation, then stood.

"Hello," she said in a friendly tone. "I'm the new professor here. Are you students?"

Erica stared at her, mouth agape, then burst into laughter. "She really thinks she's a professor! That's so cool!"

Madison frowned. "I am a professor. Are you a faculty member? I don't believe we've met." She proffered her hand to Madison, who shook it enthusiastically. The grin never left her face as she turned to Andrew and Ross.

"Holy shit, you guys! She seems so real! Do you think she knows she's a golem?"

"What are you talking about? I'm not a golem," Madison said. She sniffed a little. "I'm a visiting professor of mathematics. Why would you think I'm a golem?"

Andrew started to reply but Erica cut him off. "Where did you teach before here?"

"Wuthering University," Madison replied instantly. "Where I did my postdoc work."

"Wow, she has a backstory! I wonder if that's a real university," Erica said before continuing her interrogation. "How do you have a PhD? You're, like, twenty!"

Madison looked down at her ripped jeans and skimpy tank and frowned. "That's quite a compliment, but I assure you that I'm much older than twenty. Since my classes haven't started yet, I decided to dress comfortably."

Erica clapped her hands and laughed. "She's got an answer for everything! You guys, I've got to get one of these. They're so cool!" She reached out to poke Madison's cheek again, but Madison quickly brushed her hand aside.

"What do you think you're doing?" Madison asked. "That's very inappropriate."

Erica stared at her in shock before their mouths shot open simultaneously. As they collapsed, Ross turned to see Andrew with his hand on the tablet.

"Erica was getting on my nerves," he explained.