Primal Love

I found myself staring at the clock. How many hours had passed since I last looked at it? I felt like a teenager sneaking a boyfriend out under her parent’s nose. Turned out that Tyler hadn’t been bullshitting about recovering quickly. The subsequent rounds were as great as the first, but all good things came to an end. Fun as it was, I had zero intention of spending the night with him.

I was wearing one of Colin’s t-shirts and nothing else. Hands behind my back, I had a happy spring to my step as I led him to the door. He paused at the threshold, glancing back at me. “This was... well, it was fantastic.”

Half-grin on my face, I nodded. “Certainly was.”

“So, uh...” His eyes lingered on me. Even after all that, he still wanted more. I could see it. His hunger hadn’t been sated in the slightest. God, that was a dangerous feeling. Intoxicating. I had to be careful about this. Feelings like this would easily turn me back into the person I no longer wanted to be. “Kinda hoping this won’t be a one-time thing.”

Making a show of thinking about it, I eventually gave a casual shrug. “Maybe, maybe not.” Whether or not he would fuck me again was completely up to Colin. The thought of my boyfriend having control over that sent another rush through me.

Tyler obviously didn’t like that answer, but he was smart enough to know pushing it would push his chances to zero. “Well,” he said, trying to play it off as if it didn’t matter to him. “You know how to contact me.”

“Sure do!” Once he was clear, I shut the door. I waited a few seconds to throw the deadbolt. Turning, my heart raced as I rushed upstairs. The bedroom was empty. Stopping by the mirror, I gave myself a quick look. Yep. Had that ‘just got fucked’ glow about me. Taking a breath, I walked over to the bed and sat down on it. My legs felt like jelly, my skin flushed. My eyes stared at the door.

“He’s gone,” I called out, pulse intensifying. My body was quivering—from fear or excitement I didn’t know. This was part of the agreement. After I was done fucking the guy, I couldn’t clean up. No shower. No fixing my hair. Nothing. “Colin?” My voice hitched, fear gripping me. What... what if he was having regrets? That hearing me enjoy my time with Tyler had been **** rather than the enjoyment he expected. I remained on the bed, eyes searching the bedroom threshold for the man I loved. Another condition. I had to wait for him on the bed. No searching him out.

An agonizing prospect when I had no idea how he reacted to what just happened.

Movement cause my gaze to lock on the door. Back straight, I sucked in a breath at the sight of Colin. He had a shy grin.

“Hey.”

‘Hey,’ he said. As if he’d just come home from class. As if I hadn’t just fucked a man three times while he listened from the other room.

“Hey.” Jesus. I was as dumb as he was.

The silence grew. I was a fucking mess in more ways than one. My breathing began to increase as we stared at each other. I feared the worst. That he hadn’t enjoyed it like I had.

“Say something,” I pleaded, barely able to hear my own voice. My eyes drifted up as he approached. Reaching out, his hand ran against my cheek. He gently brushed my hair off my forehead, eyes running over my face.

“I can’t believe how beautiful you are.”

My heart swelled, a hopeful smile beginning to form. My eyes drifted to his lips. I wanted to taste them. To let him kiss me. His low chuckle brought my eyes back to his.

“Even after all that, you still want to fuck?”

My answer was immediate, voice clear and firm. “Yes.”

“Did he not satisfy you?”

“Oh, he did,” I said excitedly.

“Then maybe you shouldn’t have kicked him out so early.”

I pouted, tossing my lower lip out as I crossed my arms. “But I want to sleep with you.”

He clicked his tongue, shaking his head. “We talked about this, Erin. When I invite a man over, you are to use him until you are completely sated. That means no mood for anything else.”

There was a thundering in my ear. Damn heart. I stared up at him, desire raging inside me. Even though I knew I should be sated, every part of me wanted to grab Colin and drag him to bed. Once he was there, the things I would do to him...

Of course, that wasn’t what we agreed on. To be fair, all this was new territory for both of us. Colin wasn’t sure what would happen during this phase, so we were going by a, ‘play it by ear’ sort of thing. He was adamant that we not have sex. Not right away. It wasn’t something he wanted from this. To be honest, I wasn’t quite sure what he wanted—or if he even knew what exactly this would look like.

I glanced down, hands resting in my lap. “I know.”

His hand moved to my chin, gently lifting my gaze. His expression had softened. “Listening to you... enjoying yourself... was an incredible experience.” I took a shaky breath, unable to look away from his loving gaze. “But this is as far as I can go, Erin. Finding them, inviting them here, listening to you and him...” He paused. “Seeing you completely satisfied after he leaves. That is my limit.”

“I understand.”

“Good,” his voice was low and husky. He bent down and brushed a kiss against my lips. My eyes fluttered closed, his touch sending tingles through me. Just this little bit caused a raging inferno that made everything with Tyler seem like a flickering spark by comparison.

His hand began to move, gliding down my cheek as he continued to kiss me. I let him, my body melting against his. He was strong, but gentle as he **** me back onto the bed. My eyes went wide in surprise. “What are you... oh!” I gasped when he **** my legs apart, pushing my thighs up and pulling me closer to him. “But you said—”

“Shh,” he hushed me, kissing me again. Well, I certainly wasn’t going to stop him. In response, I wrapped my arms around his neck. His lips moved against mine, tongue slowly entering my mouth as he began to kiss me deeply.

I moaned softly, struggling to keep up with him. His lips worked against mine as he kissed me, his hand working up my shirt. My hands moved to his head, fingers threaded through his hair as I held him to me.

Colin pulled back from the kiss. “Tonight is special,” he whispered. He leaned forward, breath hot against my ear. “Next time, don’t let him leave until he satisfies you completely.”

The words—the implication—sent butterflies souring in my stomach. I nodded as he kissed me again, his hand sliding along my stomach. He ran his fingers over my breasts, sending a thrill through me.

He pulled back, smiling down at me as his fingers drifted down to my thighs. I was trembling as he kissed my neck, slowly moving upwards. His lips traced along my jaw, then reached the corner of my mouth, softly kissing me there as he slowly slid his fingers down my inner thigh.

My breath hitched when his fingers touched my slit . His tongue brushed against mine as he kissed me, my heart racing. He moved further down, pausing only to push the shirt up. His lips moving against my breasts. My nipples stiffened as he lightly licked and sucked, eyes closing as I wrapped my arms around his neck.

His fingers glided between my legs, moving against me as he kissed me. I gasped, my body melting into the bed. I was so wet. So ready for him. My legs wrapped around his back, urging him to continue as he lifted himself up. My heart raced as I looked up at him, my gaze moving to his lips.

“Please,” I whispered, shaking my head. “I want you inside me.”

I could see it in his eyes, the hesitation there. He seemed to be second guessing himself, but in the end, he only hesitated for a moment. He said nothing as he pulled away. His pants and underwear fell to the floor as he once more joined me in bed. I lifted my hips, helping him slide inside me.

“Oh, god,” I gasped as he filled me.

His gaze locked with mine, eyes smoldering with desire. “I love you.”

The words broke the dam holding back my emotions. I was trembling as he began to move, moving slowly at first before picking up speed. My hands ran through his hair as he kissed me. Our breaths were hot as I held him close, our bodies rubbing together.

There was something different about this. I wanted to tell him I loved him. How great this felt. Yet the words never formed. All I could do was look up at him. I moaned when he began to move faster, our bodies rocking together. My legs tightened around his back, urging him on.

We were making love. It was nothing like the sex I’d just had with Tyler, yet this went beyond the lovemaking I was used to. There was something primal in Colin’s eyes. Something that made my chest swell and set alight an inferno inside me.

My breathing quickened as his hands glided over my body. I could feel the tingles beginning to build, a rush of excitement rushing through me as his kisses grew more passionate. My hips moved with him, wanting to match him in a way I never did with Tyler. I wanted to whisper his name, yet speaking felt taboo—a cheapening of the intense emotions that spoke in the silence.

My hands ran up his back, fingers brushing against his hair as I held him close. I was out of control, my body trembling as he moved within me. My hands tightened in his hair as he kissed my neck, breathing raggedly against my skin.

My heart was hammering away, the sensations overwhelming as he filled me again and again. I could feel the heat building, my body beginning to tremble. My hands went to his chest as I arched into him.

I cried out, my body buckling as my orgasm overwhelmed me. My eyes were closed, mind blank as I felt him move within me. I could feel his seed filling me, the sensations intensifying as he slowly began to withdraw.

I lay on my back, panting. I could feel him gently stroking my hair as he kissed my neck.

My head turned, finding him lying beside me. My lips trembled as I gave him an exhausted smile. “I love you.”