The Peppernickel Problem

Wendy Peppernickel is not one of the girls who comes to mind when I imagine who I might add to my roster of Custom Girls. I didn't even really intend to add anyone, but if I wanted to add two just to get the gem reward, it'd probably be Sarah and one of her fellow cheerleaders, or maybe some other prime examples of women in my class. Wendy, on the other hand, was a kind of... "background" girl: despite the patch of white cloth over her eye, topped with what looked like some kind of round strainer with tiny holes, she just didn't stand out as a person. She was eighteen, quiet, and was part of Donna Chen's unofficial harem in the Chess Club; she was also there when I challenged and ultimately defeated her queen. But like everyone else, she should have had no inkling as to what I was up to, what permitted my power over Donna's plays, or why I walked out of there with the Chess Queen's lips still warm from mine.

But then, neither was Donna... except she proved too clever for mere awareness blockers to stop her from at least coming dangerously close to the truth, even if she wouldn't have believed it. Wendy, of course, was none the wiser... at least, that's what I thought.

“D-David Haines!” I nearly jump as I turn and find the source of my name this soon after the last bell... and look down at the small fry woman staring daggers at me with her one good eye. “We need t... to talk.”

Wendy is... not cute, really. She has a kind of up-turned nose that makes the unfortunate impression of a mouse; if she were heavier, one might feel guilty at instead comparing her to a pig. That said, she's also too skinny, like a stiff wind might blow her over in the classy uniform that droops over her like an over-sized band t-shirt. That's the other thing of course: she actually wears the boring cream-and-navy school uniform despite the loosened dress code. Her black hair always shines like its greasy, but only where it's pulled taut against her head before it reaches the tight hair scrunchy at the back of her head. There, the rest of the curly hair explodes outwards and behind her in a bouquet of messy locks. She's got freckles, pasty-white skin, thick-rimmed glasses that only one eye can probably truly benefit from (unless she can see through those tiny holes? I wouldn't even know), and neither chest nor ass to speak of. A slightly pronounced overbite--one she is obviously self-conscious of, since she's always seen pursing her lips to hide it--catches my attention for the first time now that she's just a foot away from me.

She smells nice at least: something flowery emanates from her hair, suggesting maybe that's not just some nasty case of head grease on there. I try to recall my manners with what is more or less a total stranger in my own school. “We... do?” Alright, that came out a bit rude but... really? Why do we need to talk? I've got girls to enhance.

“S-Somewhere private... b-but not too private!” I raise an eyebrow at that. “J-Just... um...” Her eye darts to the crowd of students marching through the hall to escape the school, and I'm now aware of the curious gazes that dot the crowd. I'm no socialite, but even I know that Wendy doesn't really... "socialize," at least not as visibly as she's doing right now. Besides, I'm a boy (and kind of a loser by school standards), she's a girl (and definitely a loser by school standards)... I can see the rumors forming, but only seconds after their sources float away in the crowd to spread them, if they'reso inclined.

“Is this about Chess Club? I don't really want to join, I just played her once-”

“I-I know about... your secret.... and your ph...phone.” Her furrowed, unkempt brow, the stabbing glare of her brown eye, the stuttered accusation... it takes a moment to come together and make me realize what she means.

But that's... that's impossible. No, no she must mean something else... but what else could she mean? I have to play it cool. “Let's go to Ms. Lia's room.”

She grimaces at that, but slowly builds it into a discomforting smile. “I know all about her, too...”

Wha... what? My heart skips a beat or three as I lock up in shock. Alright, now what else could she be talking about? But... but how?! Her Awareness should be zero!

“It’s alright... j-just don’t try anything. I set it up so e... e-everything gets revealed if you do anything to me... so just hear me out, OK? I-If you do, I... I can guarantee your safety.”

I look around in a panic, but no one seems to listen or care. I meet her steady gaze once more and clear my throat. “Y-Yeah... alright.” But I’m feeling rather far from alright.

It doesn't take her much more convincing once she sees I'm willing to meet in front of a teacher, especially a hard-ass like Ms. Lia... but then again, she apparently has some idea about the "new" Sophia Lia I've got in store. It's only as we begin walking that I realize my hand is clutching my phone in my pocket for dear life, like it's at risk of being stolen or something. The only glance I throw back at her finds her staring intently at where my hand hides in my pocket... or at my ass, but let's be real here.

The questions floating around me chase us all the way to that English teacher's door. Beyond that portal waits Ms. Lia, expecting students that were likely to come not for questions, but only for more of her voice... and, I would soon discover, who would each be, or already had been, denied enjoyment of it.

Ms. Lia smiles and nods at us, even as her eyes widen at the sight of me. Seeing Wendy apparently puts her at ease, however, and she gently taps the blackboard behind her. There, written in huge letters, waits a message she didn't think of until after my class with her:

I LOST MY VOICE. PLEASE SILENTLY READ THE TELL-TALE HEART

So she did eventually realize what her voice was doing to people... and of course she has no intention continuing to driver her students into moist forays or reducing poor Wendy here into a twitching, horny mess. Despite the latter's unimpressive appearance, I can't help but wonder what that would look like...

“G-Good afternoon, Ms. Lia... if that’s really your... hmm.” Wendy’s words shrivel as she tries to boldly accuse Ms. Lia of... something, though at this point I’m not sure I want to hear what she’d call it. Debt whore? Milk ****? Girlfriend? I still can't wrap my head around Wendy connecting me, my phone, and Ms. Lia, so for now I just have to control the situation as best I can. “Well... c-could we use your room to-”

“Sophia,” I interrupt, “we need some privacy. Could you leave us alone for a few minutes?”

Wendy's face somehow gets paler as she realizes what's escaped my mouth... and then, bizarrely, a reassured smile grows. Seeing Sophia Lia obey my request should shock almost anyone... but when Sophia nods and rises to leave, I don't get to see Wendy reeling from surprise.

“Of course,” Wendy whispers to no one, solidifying my fear: somehow, in some way, she knows!

Fuck a duck, duck duck, fuck-!

Snap out of it, Dave, you stopped breathing! I inhale deep and sigh through my nose as I try to relax. Feeling steadier, I manage to speak. “There, that should give us time. So... what did you want to talk about?”

Still recovering from these revelations, I almost confuse Wendy looking up Wendy looks up at me with a newfound respect... no, fear. She's... apparently terrified of me. “Y-You... that was... that was Ms. Lia!”

“It... still is her, somewhere out there-”

“No one could talk to her like that before and live!” I only answer with a proud smirk, but that's quickly wiped away as she points to my pocket and declares, almost loud enough to worry me, “It’s because of you... no... because of that ‘phone’ of yours, isn't it?!”

“W-Wait, what are you... talking about?” Shit, I'm not a good liar... and I honestly never thought I'd need to be about an app no one's gotten a good look at...

... but that's not the situation, I'm soon told. “I saw it... I saw the s-shape of D-Donna, and her name, and you had buttons... some kind of interface on your device. A-A-Admit it!”

“Wait, you saw- err, I mean, what ‘interface’? I don't have anything like that. When would you have even-”

My mind races back to Chess Club.

I flashed my phone into view, proving my innocence to Donna.

I kept the screen facing away from her since I couldn't let her see the screen with her outline, name, and the hotkey for her bad plays.

I didn't think anything of it. Who'd see such detail behind me while engaged in the middle of their own chess matches? Who was even looking up long enough to catch sight of it? I didn't even worry about that until after the fact; Donna didn't see it, and she was the only one smart enough to-

Wendy Peppernickel. She was playing behind me... and despite that glance, despite so quick a look, she... how? Fuck, how?!

Fuck. I've got a witness... and she didn't even have to take my phone or do anything to earn a punishment to realize my power. Fuck. Fuck! No, no, Dave, relax... that's way too much to assume she's figured out from a glance. Like insanely a lot. And what were the chances? Unless the succubi were fucking with destiny or something, there's no chance Wendy would happen to just-

“Every time she moved, your hand m-moved in the pocket... I watched. I couldn't stand to look at her... her 'playing,' if it could be called that that day, and my own game was won, but... b-but your hand. I thought you were being fed moves, l-like maybe she was pranking us and... and you were communicating... I-I had so many theories but... but instead...”

“You just... you were just staring at me the whole time? I never saw you looking-” No, that's not accurate: I didn't just never see her looking. I never saw her at all; I discounted her presence entirely. For fuck's sake, she's only got one good eye and it wasn’t even on the side of her head that faced me... well, unless she turned, which obviously she... did. Fuck. “Well, that's weird... but I'm not even sure about what you're implying here? Like I said, I was waiting for a call.”

“Y-You were... not. I followed you.” My heart sinks as she shoots back with more confidence. She stands tall in Ms. Lia’s classroom; petite as she is, she suddenly seems towering as she declares her prosecution with conviction. Her stuttering all but clears up. “You didn't call anyone... you kept on your phone, and you kept it close to your chest like you were afraid... like you were afraid someone would see or take it. Soon I found out why. I know what you're up to.”

“I...” I'm stuck like a deer in headlights before a girl I've got a clean foot over on height. She's shaking, but she's keeping brave before me... and now I wonder, what can be done with her to silence her? What can I do... to protect myself? Nothing, I decide; I couldn't bear to raise a hand against her, after all, and while customizing her might help with something, it would only confirm her suspicions if I pulled it out and did it right in front of her.

“I know what you are.”

What about the new punishments? If she acted against me, sure... but what if she just tries to protect others? What if she told anyone who'd listen... what if Alice found out? Or Ms. Hatts? Shit! As my brain races, her hand flies up and points an accusing finger at my face; I stare down it like the barrel of a gun, and she pulls the trigger-

“... You're an alien!”

Outside, a rooster crows. No one knows who the rooster belongs to, or how it got on top of the gym, but it shrieks for its life. Every nearby student’s thoughts stop on a dime once they hear it and, for a moment, the present student body is unified in its baffled state... save for the one-eyed girl pointing her finger at me.

I don’t hear the rooster. It takes me the whole length of its caw for me to finally blink and unconsciously drool out a dumbfounded “Whuu...ut?”

“I’ve been tracking the movements of 2019-OK, taking my own measurements of ambient radiation and cross-referencing it with the highly suspect reports by NASA about it nearly missing us... and frankly, I can’t be the only one who managed to see the anomaly. Those fools on the civilian reporting line tried to trick me,” she continues as I only grow more lost, “saying it was probably a faulty lens or the low quality of the equipment I was using, that 2019-OK coming as close to hitting Earth as it did was a gravitational anomaly, nothing more... but sure enough, the very next day... it happens. My dear Chess Queen, she... she played like a rank amateur, and did so so naturally, all while your device worked her mind and dominated her faculties!”

I only cut back in when I hear her finally arrive somewhere near the truth. “That’s... a lot-”

“Don’t try to deny it! That ‘phone’ had a full body scan of her; I saw it with my own eyes!”

At a distance, the outline of the Custom Girl is probably the most recognizable thing... but how the Hell does she think I’m an-

“Ms. Lia being so subservient, her classes coming under some kind of... perverse influence, but only after your class with her... her first class of the day. Of course, it's just chance that I came to realize what happened to her... because I live just two doors down from Ms. Lia. I saw you **** her to transport her to her own home, no doubt to help shift suspicion from your human cover.” At this point, she pushes her glasses up with a triumphant smile I can’t even fathom correcting. “But we humans aren’t so ****, so dull or easily fooled... some of us are keen enough to catch on. So I set up a directional microphone to spy on your operation... and the unnatural noises I heard from Ms. Lia, and from whatever your true form is like... I recorded them, every second of it.”

I try to think back to my weekend with Ms. Lia... and specifically just the “sounds” this one might’ve heard. Lots of squelching, the gentle spray of milk, my grunts and Ms. Lia doing everything from soft mewling to howling like a banshee. Putting aside that I was creepily spied on by the neighborhood madwoman, why was any of that alien to this girl... unless she really just never heard people have sex? That’s impossible, right?

“That’s right, ‘David,’ or whatever your true name is: I even recorded when you replaced Ms. Lia, too. I’ve got it all saved in an online cache that will be released to the media and several government agencies if I’m disposed of before I can reverse the transmission command. Let me give you a key preview to what will be transmitted...”

Wendy rummages through her backpack as she speaks until, with a grunt, she produces her cellphone... and, with a few swipes, an audio clip from the same.

Sophia's voice emanates from the phone after a period of static... and yet it is so clearly unlike her usual, prudish self. “This is our security system to ensure our users are protected from any unfortunate discoveries or interference... at least, unwanted inter...zzZZZzzdsssszzz..... help you customize her or others...zzzzzZzzz... happy with our current maestro.”

That was Sophia's voice... but back when Jane was in her body! My own voice answers her in the same recording. “So if I show this...ZzZzz... anyone...”

“Then you... ZZzzzzZZZzz... consequences. But here? We’ll take care of her... hmm. She’s a tough cookie though, even after all you’ve put her through. I can’t hold her for lo...zZzzzzZZZZZ..ve to pick it for you...!”

Wendy cuts off the recording, her brow furrowed until it dips behind the thick rim of her glasses. “I don’t know what your kind did to the original David Haines... or the original Ms. Lia... but I want answers, and I want you to spare Donna. I can promise anonymity and safety if you can accept my terms... or even just admit it and show me the truth... but if you do anything to me, you will be exposed.” She tips her head upwards as she confidently beams at me. “I'm sure you're surprised to have been caught so quickly... but rest assured, I can help you... in exchange for the truth, for the secrets of the stars, and for my own protection from your... ‘security system,’ as poor Ms. Lia now calls it. So what will it be... ‘David’?” She's triumphant and terrified; cocky and unsure; going by a detailed script until, at this critical moment, where she is well and truly improvising in hopes that the alien invasion she's uncovered will somehow guarantee her safety and enlightenment...

Me? I'm trying to remember how to talk. She waits patiently as I slowly put together the absurd chance, happenstance, and the batshit-crazy conspiracy theorizing that brought her here, to this conclusion and to my endangerment...