Catching feels.

"I can't keep doing this. I am falling in love with you and you still just treat me like a frenemy with benefits, and, yes, I see the irony in how I have treated women in the past and objecting when it happens to me. Is this a punishment? If so, how much longer do I have to endure it? Is it just how it's going to be? If so, I...I'm sorry, I promised myself I wouldn't cry..." Brad breaks his promise, breaking down into raw, ragged sobs. You tentatively pat him on the back, but he brushes you away, not in the mood to be patronized.

You suppose you should have seen this coming. Brad always had everything he wanted, so he never learned how to handle rejection, even if it was purely emotional. He was so used to no strings attached hook ups, cutting anyone loose that got to tangled up. Now that it's happening to him, he sees the hurt he's caused, but it doesn't make his own pain any easier to process.

Your first instinct is to apologize, years of capitulating to bullies and ignoring your own wants and needs because you see no chance of fulfilling them. Your second instinct is to tell him to go fuck himself, but that seems off too. This is one time he is wrong, without having done anything wrong. He fell in love with a girl that doesn't love him back and never will. Worse, you don't see any path ahead for him that doesn't end up with Brad becoming someone drastically different, but this sure isn't the time to tell him that nor are you the person.

The best you can offer is a heartfelt, "I cannot apologize for being honest and genuine with you, but I wish I could. I hate to see you hurting like this. Your pain is valid and you are 100% correct that I don't love you. I honestly cannot love you. Ever. I do hope you keep looking for love and being as kind and open with them as you have with me this past month. You're right that we shouldn't continue our physical relationship any longer." You give him a kiss goodbye and feel a weight lift off your chest. This wasn't easy and you hate losing a toy, but at least it's out in the open and everyone can move on. So far so good...

....

"I want to take Maggie out on a date." Emma says carefully, clearly having thought about this request for a long time. "It's more than just play for her now, and I don't want to treat her like..." Vanessa flinches and Emma winces, "sorry...I mean I don't want to treat her like an object. Period. And...we've been playing rilly well together for like a month and a week and other than you two, that's a record for me. I don't want to stop seeing her. On top of the mind blowing sex..." Emma winces again remembering we aren't sharing that aspect of Maggie either. "Sorry! Sorry. I'm like rilly bad at this. I...I don't want to hurt anyone, but that's like impossible, right? So I want to be honest and caring as best I can. I want to date Maggie and I kinda sorta hope it becomes serious, but just because I don't won't to share that, doesn't mean I want to lose what we have."

At least this time no one yells or goes cold. In fact, Cindi takes it better than anyone, including Emma. "You are the cutest little carebear, Emma. Of course it's okay! I want us all to be our happiest healthiest selves, and I can see how happy Maggie makes you. That's just speaking for myself of course." Your former mistress is making great strides in not controlling the conversation, which helps with contentious issues like this.

"I just want to know what we call you? Maggemma sounds like a lava monster in a kids cartoon. Emmaggie just sounds Canadian." Laughter is a welcome response compared to your gentle jab. "Seriously, tho, I'm excited for you. You know whatever happens, we'll be here for you."

Emma practically tackles you two to the ground she is so relieved. Soon she's sharing that feeling of pent up pressure erupting in jubilant joy with you both in the form of one of your giggliest, giddiest girltime gushathons you've ever shared together. You almost wish she'd start dating even more, if the results are going to be this climatic. So far so good...

....

"We have to stop seeing each other." Vanessa looks like she is just barely holding herself together with safety pins and leather straps. Sure, she has plenty of both, but you've never seen her this hurt. She looks like she is filled to the brim with broken glass, the pieces all fitting together just so, and threatening to fall apart entirely. "I don't want to do this either. But this isn't going to work when one of us loves me, but I don't love her and I love one of you and they don't love me."

You have been punched in the stomach before, a lot of times before. Kicked too, once with steel toed boots. This feels worse than that, but it's a similar sensation. You try to catch your breath and can only gasp gruelingly. Tears fill your eyes and you struggle to focus. You could tell Vanessa was always more interested in you than she was Cindi, especially after the thrill of fucking a former queen beeyotch wore off, but you didn't realize Cindi had caught feelings for Vanessa. Even more earth shattering is learning the creepy cutie has been in unrequited romance with you for two months and change. You guess you were so caught up in not getting too close that you didn't see you already had.

The worst part is that you really do care about Vanessa. As an outcast, invisible only when she isn't a target of ridicule or rage, she understands aspects of you better than Cindi or Emma do. She has a great sense of humor that goes from goofy to Grand Guinol and back again. She's beautiful and bashful and bossy when she's feeling good about herself. You are halfway through your list of why it can't possibly work out when you realize all you can think of is how perfect she is for you.

You grab her hands and look deep into her dark, dreamy eyes. "I can't. I can't stop seeing you. I can't lose you having just started getting to know you. I promise not to shut you out again. I promise to give us a fighting chance and to fight for us. I do love Cindi and being with you too doesn't make me love her any less. It kills me to hurt her, but it's worse to lie to her. I'll talk to her and Emma tonight and we'll plan a date for this weekend." You kiss and your head spins so you hold her tighter so you don't fly apart. She cries and clasps tightly and there is an unspoken undercurrent that you need to fuck hard for hours then make sweet, slow love all night, but it would be a betrayal to share that behind your lovers' backs.

You settle for tender kisses and Vanessa's threats, "Just remember, never break a witch's heart." She smiles, but in a way that scares you more, and you part painfully, but with promise. While you aren't looking forward to your conversation tonight, you are pretty sure based on everything you've made it through so far that your lovers triad can survive and even thrive with this. After all, it has so far...

So far so good...

So far so good...

So...