Au Naturel

You stop by a convenience store on your way to the bus and buy a plastic wrapped baguette. As you pay and exit, you look at your reflection in the shoplifting mirrors and marvel at your huge red beard and bald head. You doubt anyone is staking out the crosswalk still, but better safe than sorry.

You approach the bus stop from the other side of the street, giving you an excuse to walk past the button and discreetly brush it with your fingers on the way. The QEBP material sticks to you immediately and is absorbed back into your finger.

"74 new entanglements added"

Not quite as big a haul as the elevator. Guess people don't usually observe correct pedestrian etiquette at this quiet street crossing. Still, not bad.

You sit in the back of the bus and unwrap and bite down on your stale chicken and curry mayonnaise baguette, and it's the most heavenly thing you've ever put in your mouth. You feel energy flooding your body, and a tiredness you hadn't noticed before seems to lighten. Starving for three days was not your best idea ever, hunger control or not.

After scarfing down the whole baguette, you sit back and relax, feeling full and content. Eventually you decide to have a look at what Joanne is up to. She's in much earlier than you, sitting at her desk in her office with a stack of papers to her left, and an open laptop and a phone on her right. She's ditched the tracksuit for a plain black pantsuit and dangly hoop earrings. She's staring intently at a paper in her hand, some kind of employee review form, and her other hand on her forehead. She makes an annoyed grunt and throws the paper to the side, grabbing another one from the pile. After a few seconds of staring at it, she tossed it to the side as well. She gets up, paces around the room, stares out the window for a bit. She really has a great view of downtown. You wonder if you'd be able to spot your bus approaching, but she sits backs down and pulls the laptop towards her. She clicks around for a while in some people management software, then pushes the laptop away with an audible groan and leans back in her chair.

Suddenly the phone rings, and she recoils like it bit her. She gingerly picks it up and makes a face when she sees who's calling. Deliberating for a few seconds, she eventually presses the answer button and holds it up to her ear.

"Good morning ma'am!", she says with ill feigned happiness. "Yes... No. I mean, yes. Soon! I'm almost done! Just a few... Yes. Yes. I know, and I'll... Yes. By lunch. Before lunch. In an hour?! No no, it's fine, I will... No! No need for that, you'll have them in an hour, I'll... Yes. No problem! I can guarantee you that... Hello? Ma'am?"

She puts the phone down, a mixture of fear and embarrassment showing on her face. She looks at the papers and shakes her head. Then she pulls the laptop closer to her again and taps a few keys, bringing up your photo and profile.

You've arrived at your stop and you're making your way over to the office. Ducking in to an alley on the way, you get rid of the beard and baldness, reverting to your normal self. By the time you're at the building, Joanne has a determined look in her eyes and is leaving her room. You hurry it up a bit, taking the back entrance and hastening to your office. You hoist some old motherboards onto your desk, sit down in your chair and pretend to be hard at work poking them, when she knocks.

"Come in!" you say loudly. The door opens, and a skeptical-looking Joanne pokes her head in. She wrinkles her nose as she takes in the clutter and general state of your basement office. "Can I help you?", you ask.

"Yes, erm, Smith? Richard Smith?" she takes a step into the room, closing the door behind her while touching the handle as little as possible.

"That's me", you say. She's holding something in her hands, you notice. It's a coffee mug.

"Right, well...", she says, seemingly steeling herself for something. "It's like this Richard. My name is Joanne Dupert, I work in HR, and I was looking over your file and saw that you are the only one in the company who hasn't gone though our mandatory **** test. We need to administer it to all our employees or we might lose our license. Very strict regulations on that, especially in this business"

"Wow!" you say. "That certainly sounds serious. What's the license?"

"It's... it's very technical. The details don't matter, the point is that everyone has to take the test. It could have very serious consequences for the company and you if this oversight was discovered". She's blathering, and you can feel her uncertainty and slight embarrassment. She's really hoping you will buy this.

"Alright then", you say, relief blooming on her face. "If it's that serious I guess I have ****. Do you need some blood or how does this work?". You push your chair back and begin rolling up your sleeves.

"Ah, about that...", she looks embarrassed again, her face growing a little red. "It just so happens that this particular test has some... very particular requirements..."

"Oh?" you feign surprise.

"Yes. You see, we require a... ehm, a sample. Of your... seminal fluids...". Joanne is looking down at the floor, face flushing.

"My seminal fluids? What's that?". You lean forward in your chair, all helpful and innocent.

"It's... Look, we need a sperm sample. I wouldn't ask but it's really important"

"Sperm sample?!", you say, sitting upright, shock tinging your words.

"Yes, and like I said, it is very important"

"I don't know, this seems really weird..." you say, adapting a look of skepticism and mild affront. You roll down your sleeves and look at the nervous, red-faced woman fidgeting with the cup in her hands. "Are you sure this is necessary?"

"Yes Richard, very sure. I wouldn't ask otherwise..."

"Okay... I guess... So... Can you give me a few hours? I think this will take me a while on my own. I try to keep a very professional mindset while I'm at work"

Joanne looks visibly afraid and says "No no, I can't wait that long! I mean..." she catches herself and proceeds a little slower "I mean, the test needs to be sent right away, there's no telling when we will be inspected. Yes..."

"I would love to help you... Joanne?", she nods and you continue "But I simply can't do this so quickly alone. I need to... get in the mood of you know what I mean"

"Can't you just..." she waves her hand around "...look at some inspiration on the internet?". You give her a blank look. "You know... porn?"

"Porn!", you manage some more indignance "Ma'am, I do not engage in such filth. It goes against my every principle", you say, and cross your arms.

"I..." Joanne is taken aback by your fervour, "I didn't mean to imply anything, it is just... Well, how would you normally... you know. Masturbate?"

"I do not do such things alone." If you only count the past week it's not even a lie. "It drains your life energy to just toss it away without sharing it with another. Sexual energy is very precious you know"

Joanne looks momentarily intrigued at that, but falls back into stress quickly. "Do you have anyone who could... No, that would take too long...". She's frantically throwing about for a way out, then asks "Is there... uhm... is there anything I could... What if I... helped you? Gave you a... hand?"

You look confused and innocent again and say "What do you mean?"

"I mean... mr Smith, I mean if you can't... you know... on your own, then maybe I could... you know... help you out. With my hands...", your eyes go wide at that, and she quickly adds "Because of the emergency you see! It really is very important we get this done as soon as possible!"

"I couldn't possibly ask you to do something so inappropriate ms Dupert". You push a tiny cocktail of anxiety and arousal her way, and manifest a small patch of QEBP material in the roof of your mouth. Joanne's eyes go a little wider, and her fidgeting intensifies.

"It's really no problem Richard! This... It really needs to be done! Right now!"

"Would you really be okay with that Joanne? Helping me come here in the office?". You feel the tiny nub of Joanne's clit poke out in your mouth, and you give it a tiny flick with your tongue.

"Eep!", she says, and jumps a little, almost dropping her cup. "I mean... yes! I... I would be fine with that"

"Just so we are clear here" you say, dropping the innocent act, "you are offering to take my erect cock in your hand and jerk it until I come for you? Right here, right now, in the office?"

Joanne looks taken aback by your bluntness, but she swallows and after discreetly clenching her thighs together tightly, she nods. You flick her clit again and a shudder runs up her body.

"Alright then. How do you want to do this?"

Joanne looks around uncertainly, then says "I guess we can just... do it right... here? I just need to... get it in this cup and I'll take it with me". She hastens to add "To the lab! For analysis!"

"Of course. Do you mind turning around so I can get ready?"

"Yes... yes of course, I'll just... face the door. But please hurry!". She turns around and continues fidgeting, occasionally moving from foot to foot.

You spin your chair around and unbuckle your pants, pulling them down along with your underwear. Your budding erection lies in your lap.

It's alright. It's never let you down so far, but you feel that you have to do something special for Joanne, give her something to remember. You concentrate, and the black purple of the QEBP creeps up and covers it, replacing your manhood with a dark patch.

Malleable manifestation. It allows you to alter the parts you manifest through the QEBP in various ways, the foremost being proportions. As usual you don't feel like you have exact control of this feature yet, but you give it a shot.

The familiar bulge begins to grow on your groin, shifting shape and colour. Your eyes go wide as you realize you may have overdone it a bit, when the bulge widens to half the size of your fist, and does not slow down. A monster cock takes shape, twice as thick and twice as long as your regular, and that's just at half mast. It pours forth from your skin, snaking down your thighs and coming to rest halfway to your knees. You feel its weight on your legs, can see the throbbing of each vein.

"We need to hurry this up Richard, I'm very late to... the lab", a stressed out Joanne says behind you. "Are you ready yet?"

You spin the chair back around and face Joanne who also turns. When she sees your massive cock her jaw drops open and her eyes bulge.

You spread your legs wide and say "Ready when you are"