Pretty Well, Actually

You know the routine where interviews are concerned. You speak in your made up language and your voodoo witchdoctor manager "translates" for you. Still, you are able to indicate a few general things about how you want a question answered with your mannerisms and tone of voice. You sit imperiously in your chair as your manager relaxes and slouches a bit, easy-going as ever. The interviewer begins.

"Amazon," she says, "you've just picked up a major victory out there. In fact you're the first in a long time to take "Dirty" Sanchez down. Any thoughts, right off?"

"Unbatu kalish di falugah da," you say authoritatively, "dumata waka tubat."

"The great Amazon says," translates your manager, "that she is proud to have struck a blow for women everywhere. Sanchez got what was coming to him."

"Is that why you chose to sodomize him instead of the usual?" follows the interviewer.

"Tuk waka junak," you say emphatically, but with a smirk, "utara maka wannamanna waja tu."

"Sanchez needed to receive the kind of discipline that embarrassment of a mother obviously never gave him," says your manager, "hopefully, this will teach him some respect, but I doubt it."

"Speaking of which," presses the interviewer, "what about the assist at the end by "Pleasure Boy"? Are you grateful or offended that he chose to help you there."

"Takawaka jutaba tu di cadaba," you say casually and with a little smile, winking then, "tanaga hubata jobodo jaka."

"If the little fellow had interfered during the actual match," translates your manager, "or if he had not been such an enjoyable lover in their matches, then perhaps offense would be taken, but as it is, they are comrades in arms and the assist was simply a courtesy that would be returned if the opportunity arose."

There are a few questions more and after the interview, your manager has a quick conversation on the phone before returning to you.

"I think that went rather well," he says, "by the way, I heard back about that rematch. They wanna make it a team match, Sanchez and "Mama" Ta-tas against you and a partner of your choice. All is up to you is to choose who you want."

You think that one over. The first name that pops to your mind is Paulie. You know he's a superb fighter and has been pulling out surprises all over the place. Still you've never tag-teamed with him before and this is a match where you can't afford to get your signals mixed. Then there's Tesla the Texas Titaness. You have teamed with her before, she's got much needed muscle, and a grudge against Sanchez. One of the Oni sisters might work as well given that you'd essentially get two partners rather than one unofficially.