You do, with unsatisfying results

“Can I, uh, tell you something kinda weird?” You ask.

“Sure man. What’s up?” He says. You take a deep breath, trying to gather your thoughts.

“Ok. So, this is going to sound completely insane. Like, totally bonkers. So just hear me out.” You begin.

You then tell him about everything that happened since the shooting star. At first, he just looks confused. A bit weirded out by you telling an in detail story of how you ended up banging your step family. He rolls his eyes a when you tell him about Patty, clearly not buying it. But when you start telling him about what happened with Ramona, both times, he starts to look nervous. When you finish, you just sit in silence for a few seconds. Then suddenly, he starts awkwardly laughing.

“What are you laughing at?” You ask.

“Ok, ya got me.” He says, still very clearly uncomfortable. “Weird way to joke about getting with my sister, but points for creativity.”

“Look I know it’s crazy, but it’s not a joke dude.” You say. If you didn’t already know how stupid it all sounds, you’d get annoyed.

“Chris, I’ve known you way too long to know there’s no way you’ve got the skills to tap that much ass in a day. And there’s no way you’d get with your stepmom or my sister.” He says, now starting to sound agitated.

“But I did. I didn’t mean to but I did.”

“Dude, if this is some messed up way of trying to tell me you fucked my sister I swear-”

“It isn’t! I mean, I guess technically it is but it’s not because I tried to. She just kinda... fell.” You say meekly.

“Do you have any idea how stupid that sounds?”

“I know how it sounds. That’s what I’m telling you. I don’t know how but that stupid wish I made came true.”

“Which is exactly why this is so unbelievable, because magic isn’t real. If every wish ever made on a shooting star came true don’t you think I’d know about it? Do you have any idea how many pet dinosaurs I’d have?”

You cock your eyebrow up at his oddly specific example.

“Hey, don’t act like that’s weirder than you wishing for unlimited sex. Or weirder than you wanting to have sex with Ramona.” Tyler says. You just let out a sigh.

“I didn’t want to. Look, I know it sounds insane. And I don’t know why it came true. But it did! And I don’t know what I’m supposed to do about it.” You tell him, pleading that he’ll listen to you. He sits still for a minute.

“Alright, fine, if you aren’t gonna drop this stupid joke, prove it.” Tyler says. You stare at him, unsure you heard him properly.

“What?” You ask.

“You heard me. If this is real, then prove it. Go seduce some random chick that would never do you and prove it.”

“That’s not how it works though. I can’t control it, it just happens when I get hard.” You tell him.

“Whatever man. Unless you’ve got some way of proving it this is just too unreal.” Tyler says.

The rest of the time at Waffle House is quiet, neither of you talking to each other. You’re upset Tyler doesn’t believe you, but honestly you don’t blame him. You both just eat silently, occasionally checking your phones. Eventually you both get up to head back towards the apartment, Tyler claiming that Ramona should be gone for a while. About half way there you try to talk to him again.

“Hey man, I’m sorry for dumbing such a weird story on you like that. I know you probably aren’t ever gonna believe it, so let’s just forget about it.” You say.

“It’s fine. Already forgotten.” He says, maybe a bit to enthusiastically.

“Really? Just like that.”

“Just like that. I mean, we’ve all overcommitted to a stupid joke before, right?” Tyler responds.

“Yeah... right...”

Not long after that you make it to the apartment again. Just as Tyler said Ramona seems to be gone, and Hugh is at work. You’re about to plop down on the couch when Tyler speaks up.

“Hey, you mind grabbing my laptop from my room for me?” He asks.

“Sure, where’d you leave it?”

“Oh I’m sure you’ll find it.” Tyler says.

You can’t help but feel that something weird is happening, but regardless you head towards his room.