Trick the Little Bastards

Looking over the village and the goblins in it you can’t see them as anything other than walking bundles of EXP. There’s no way that you’re passing this up.

Deciding on deceit as the way to go you head out. The goblins don’t seem to be paying much attention to their surroundings. The tracks you found were likely from a few goblins going out in search of food. They didn’t seem bothered by the thought of heroes of other creatures catching them unawares. Or perhaps they were just resigned to their fates of low level hero fodder. Either way it worked to your benefit.

You make your way to one of the paths that lead out of the village, though far enough away to be well out of earshot. There you set to preparing on of your more involved available traps: a pitfall. It takes a fair bit of time to complete with the simple tools you were able to make for yourself, but at the end of your efforts you’re rewarded with a respectable pit. It’s a few meters deep and the bottom is lined with sharp punji sticks. It takes a bit more time to disguise the top and to reinforce it to collapse under what you estimate to be the correct amount of weight. It will hold you on your own no problem. Five or ten of the jittering little goblins though? Probably not.

With the trap set you make your way back to the village and prepare to make an appearance. Cautiously you step into the open and make yourself known.

“Are you having troubles friend, goblins?” You call to them as another DEE-WOO sounds to a chorus of frustrated groans. Upon hearing your call the entire village scrambles to their feet and you warily stand as they scurry towards you.

“Warg! Packleader! Great hunter! Smart Warg!” The creatures all cry, their voices overlapping on another as they come to greet you in what seems to be a friendly manner. One of them separates from the mob and comes to speak with you. Her skin is a particularly vibrant shade of green, and her little body plush with curves. A loin cloth encircles her waist, barely covering what it is meant to and her breasts are bound by a similarly unsuitable cloth wrap. You assume she is their chieftainess. She moves to you and falls to her knees.

“Oh great hunter, have you come to help us?” She asks, wide eyes giving you a pathetic, pleading look. “Goblins no can build huts now. Please, you know the secret? Show us? We… very grateful.” She looks you up and down, eyes lingering on your sheathe. Was she trying to… seduce you into helping? You hold back a shudder of revulsion and press on with the act.

“I do know the secret. In the new update you need an item to claim land. I can get you the item, but I’ll need some of you to come with me. It will be a fight.” You wait to see how they take this, wondering if their cowardice would overcome their desire for proper buildings.

“How many you need?” The female leader asks you before committing any further, a hint of suspicion in her voice..

“Ten of you should suffice. There isn’t any great danger. The item is in the lair of a forest troll. You just need to draw it away while I steal what you need.” You spin the lie you’d thought about ahead of time. Forest trolls would be dangerous for the level one or two goblins to confront, but only if they were to actually fight it. Running from it shouldn’t be any issue, so you hoped that it would be a plausible plan.

“Ten goblins to distract troll! Pah.” She turns, ready to blow the deal off.

“So you don’t want huts. Your… mounds are suitable?” You ask, loud enough for the gathered goblins to hear.

“Huts! Yes, huts! No more cold mud.” The shrill shrieks of dissent stopped the wary chieftainess in her tracks.

“Fine then! You want huts? Volunteer. Go. Be troll food.” She storms back to the center of the village while several goblins scramble to form up in a loose group before you. It looks to be the bulkiest of the male goblins that volunteer for the venture. Definitely a prime example of brawn over brains. You grin as you overlook the bunch of volunteers.

“Great, follow me and I’ll lead you to the troll. When we get there just make him angry and lead him away. I’ll get the item for you.” You tell the assembled goblins before moving on, keeping a decent little distance ahead of the group as you lead them along the path and well away from their village.

You maintain your composure along the way, trying not to give away any sign that you’re leading them into a trap. It goes well. The little beasts aren’t exactly geniuses, and the ones that decided to follow you must be scraping the bottom of the barrel when it comes to intelligence or wits.

Before long you come to the stretch of path that you’d trapped. You tread lightly over the disguised pit, secure in the knowledge that the covering would hold you. You continue on your way, your heart beginning to pound as the goblins follow right over. The ones at the front look down at their feet as the sticks that make up the covering begin to bow beneath the weight of more and more goblins before… Crash! The screen gives way beneath the goblins and the cries of surprise quickly turn to screams of pain as they fall the short distance and become impaled on the sharpened lengths at the bottom of the pit. Two of the goblins had managed to scramble clear as the trap had made itself clear. They stared in horror at the screaming, moaning tangled heap of goblins at the bottom of the pit before looking to you and yelling out in rage.

Your mouth lolls open in a feral grin as the little beasts rush at you. You’d expected to still have a fight, and a mere two goblins was better than you’d been thinking might happen. Worst case you’d been prepared to put that micro-boss sub-type to the test. You hadn’t made that much progress to your next level anyways. This though? This would be doable. As the first goblin came at you swinging a crude club you dodge and crouch to sweep your leg under them. You trip them up as they go past and swipe at the back of it’s legs with your claws. The goblin warrior goes sprawling, crying out in pain from the near crippling gash you’d opened on his limbs.

The second comes right after and swings down at you while you’re still low to the ground. You rely on your high dexterity and roll to the side, flinching for a moment as a notice dings at you.

70 EXP Gained!

One of the goblins in the pit must have bled out. Behind that first one comes several more notices and you’re up to 350 EXP gained.

Level Up!

Traps for the win! You think just before the club of the second goblin bashes your ear. You snarl in pain and leap for the little bastard, knocking him over and tearing out his throat out of instinct before remembering just how foul the taste of goblin blood was. You spit and retch on the now still body of the goblin beneath you which quickly disappears, leaving you with 60 more EXP and the rotten taste of goblin in your mouth. While you’re distracted trying to rid yourself of the taste the goblin you’d tripped up earlier comes back and gets a crack in against your back. You lose another good chunk of your health bar and scramble away.

“Gods dammit, that hurt.” You snarl at the angry goblin and launch yourself at him. A quick flurry of strikes from you are barely held back by his club. You don’t stop, furiously attacking him. “Die you damn prey!” You curse at him, almost pausing as another notice pops up.

Designated target as prey.

Master of the Hunt bonus active.

Oh, right. You’d completely forgotten about that. As you press forward each attack chips away at the health and stamina of the goblin as he maintains his increasingly futile attempt to hold you at bay. Soon enough the fight reaches its inevitable conclusion and the goblin falls to its knees as you deliver the finishing blow. Another ding of experience. You take a moment to catch your breath before going back to look into the pit. Three goblins remain, dazed and inches from ****. You gather several stones and chuck them at the creatures until they expire, granting you another 180 EXP. All told you’d gained another 300 EXP after your level up, not bad! You’re distracted by yet another notice as you celebrate.

You killed another creature with a thrown item!

Gained Thrown Weapon Proficiency!

Unlocked New Weapon Recipes:

Stone Throwing Knife

Scrap Iron Throwing Knife

Scrap Iron Shuriken

Huh, interesting. You’d have to look those over when you returned home. You think that’s it until you close the window only for another to open.

Title Acquired: Indiscriminate Hunter

You hunted other monsters for your own gain! Receive -50 base reputation with other monsters that have heard of your deeds! Deal 5% more damage to any creature with the Monster sub-type!

Wait. What? What kind of bullshit title was that? There’s no way that a mere 5% increase in damage offset that -50 reputation, was there?