Elsewhere 1: Penthouse Soirée

ELSEWHERE?! What is this? Are you abandoning your main story?! Where's my wife?!

All valid questions. But Elsewheres are side Chapters letting the reader get a wider view of the world Jaq occupies, beyond her perspective! They're not super-needed for the story's general context, but I do feel they add something, so I encourage you to enjoy them. They are, of course, third person, as our narrator is occupied ... elsewhere. Jaq will still be progressing from the Chapter previous to this one. Any questions or comments, feel free!

Also, we've talked about this. It's like you didn't get my magazine cut-out message. Oh, and again, NO COPS!

“Ma’am?” Erika van Rossum turns to face the tall, immaculately-suited man addressing her. Stretched out on a chaise lounge in a striking, red dress, midnight hair tied into an elegant bun, the pale woman looks like some kind of vintage pin-up. Her dark green eyes flutter indignantly for a moment before she speaks.

“Hugo, is there a reason you’re interrupting my ‘vain, old-timey model,’ practice? Because if I don’t have this NAILED by next Sunday, Ivan is never going to let me hear the end of it, and that’s going to put me in a mood, and I don’t think you like it when I’m in a mood!” Her tone is exasperated, but Hugo nonetheless seems uncowed. Instead, he hands Erika his phone, which she accepts with a roll of her eyes before reviewing it. Her expression shifts almost-instantly to curiosity, then to some kind of glee that seems … a little menacing. “Ooo, good job, Hugo! Anyone else spotted her yet?”

“Not insofar as I know, ma’am,” he answers coolly. “She helped a human end Trevor Barnes, though the vampire hunter did a good enough job, I suspect we’re the only ones who know of it.”

“Oh, thank GOD, I hated Trevor!” Erika groans out loud, tapping the screen in quick succession with her thumbs before passing the device back to Hugo. “No pictures of that?” He shakes his head. “Probably for the best. I don’t want to **** her and discourage people killing jackoffs in my way. It would just send the wrong message, you know? But she has to be pretty scary to kill Trevor. Pretentious little weasel that he was, he knew his battle magic.”

“The hunter seems to have some form of numen. Decapitating a Kindred with a baseball bat is … generally not something most humans have the muscle for, and I have confirmed with my reconnaissance that she is indeed only human. There is more, though.”

“Spooky van Helsing in town, I’m game. What’s the twist?” She leans forward, eyes sparkling and at-attention.

“The hunter, an Andrea Pryor, had only a minute before attempted to stake Ms. Jaquelin Lehrer after seducing her. Once they had slain Mr. Barnes, she willingly allowed Ms. Lehrer to feed from her and entertained her for the evening. I believe they have a continuing relationship.”

“Hm, see, Hugo, that’s the kind of **** material I can use!” she praises with a point of her finger at him. “It’s not an instant kill, it’s an ongoing attachment, it’s a pressure point … this is really aces work. Are you angling for a promotion, Hugo?”

“Ma’am, I am not.”

“Good. I like you daytime-ready, be a real pain if I had to change that,” she sighs with a warm grin. “You know where you want to be, Hugo. Don’t ever undervalue that. It’s a rarer gift than it sounds like.”

“You’ve educated me in the complications of unlife, ma’am. I’m better-suited to my current position.”

“And what if I expire, Hugo? Have you ever thought of what to do in the event of that tragic day?”

“I’m not so ignorant as to assume you have no plan for hazard pay.” For the first time in the conversation, he cracks a reserved smile. It transforms the absolute mammoth of a man from a head-shaven, sunglasses-wearing terminator to a cool uncle with unusually formal choices in fashion. Even Erika can’t help but broaden her grin at its appearance.

“A well-compensated employee is a happy employee. Besides, if I didn’t have you set-up, you’d probably make my funeral unbearably drab and decorate it in, like, mauve.”

“I’m a little offended, ma’am. I’m fully aware mustard if your actual least favorite color.”

“And that’s why you make the big bucks, Hugo!” she answers with pep. “Now, I need to eat before I go completely bonkers making a new file. Will you be a dear and send up some beefy sluts? Oh, and feel free to get one for yourself, if you’re feeling it.”

“Right away,” he says with a short bow before leaving. Erika walks over to her vanity, checking her expression. In a few moments, she goes through a warm smile, sultry grin, deep offense, abject sadness, and genuine amusement, then simply nods, satisfied.

“Try to steal my vibe … I’m going to fucking destroy Ivan. With my elegance and social acumen, of course,” she mutters to herself, reaching up and sliding the straps of her dress away so it can fall to the floor. Erika slowly rolls her head, cracking her neck either way, then turns to face the scantily-clad, muscular men filing into her room. She spreads her arms, wearing an outrageously expensive set of lacey, red lingerie, and smiles at them. “Okay, boys, who the hell is first?”