straight white 25

It's a bleak, empty monday morning in downtown Brooklyn when you wake up from the noises outside. Cars honking, hot dog salesmen yelling and the goddamn subway rushing past your house, rattling the entire building in the process. It'd be impossible not to wake up, and yet you've got no reason to.

Your life's been pretty much of a joke these last few weeks. You lost your job, girlfriend and car in a single week; and had to move back in with your parents in noisy New York. They resent you constantly for 'leeching on their wallets' and barely even acknowledge you, making for an uncomfortable, passive-aggressive environment. As if that wasn't enough, you find that you've woken up with an annoying case of rock-hard morning wood.

Looking at your clock, you see that there's still about half an hour left before your parents wake up.