Killing goblinses

The Shadowmouth Caverns yawned before them like a dark wound in the earth. Stalactites hung from the ceiling like jagged teeth, and the air grew cool and damp as the trio ventured deeper. Kyle's chainmail clinked with each step, his sword drawn and ready. Alistair's staff glowed with soft blue light, illuminating the winding tunnels ahead. Selere walked between them, her dark skin seeming to absorb the light rather than reflect it.

"So," Kyle whispered, keeping his voice low, "these cave-goblins. What's the deal? Are they the cute kind or the stab-you-in-the-face kind?"

Alistair shot him a flat look. "There is no cute kind."

"Stab-you-in-the-face it is," Kyle muttered.

Selere's lips curled into a smile. "They're also known for stealing anything shiny. Jewelry, weapons, belt buckles..." Her violet eyes flicked down to Kyle's trousers. "Though I doubt they'd be interested in what you're packing."

Kyle grinned despite the tension. "You'd be surprised. It's pretty shiny."

Alistair made a strangled noise and quickened his pace.

The tunnel opened into a vast chamber, the ceiling lost in shadow. Crude torches flickered along the walls, and the stench of unwashed goblin hung thick in the air. And there they were—maybe a dozen of them, hunched and green-skinned, with yellow eyes that gleamed in the torchlight. They were small, barely reaching Kyle's waist, but their claws looked sharp and their teeth looked sharper.

"Well," Kyle said, raising his sword, "at least they're not rat-sized."

The goblins turned as one. For a heartbeat, nothing moved. Then they charged, a screeching wave of claws and malice.

Alistair thrust his staff forward. A bolt of blue energy lanced out, catching the lead goblin square in the chest. It flew backward, crashing into its companions. Selere moved like water, twin daggers appearing in her hands as she sliced through the nearest goblin with practiced ease.

Kyle, meanwhile, discovered that fighting goblins was nothing like fighting rats. They were faster, smarter, and seemed to enjoy trying to hamstring him. He swung his sword in wide arcs, keeping them at bay, but one darted under his guard and sank its teeth into his calf.

"Son of a—" Kyle yelped, kicking it off. The goblin flew into a stalagmite and didn't get up.

"Behind you!" Selere shouted.

Kyle spun just in time to see a goblin leaping at his face. He caught it on his shield with a satisfying thunk, then brought his sword down. It wasn't elegant. It wasn't heroic. But it worked.

When the last goblin fell, Kyle stood panting, blood dripping from his calf and splattered across his chainmail. Selere was wiping her daggers clean on a rag, looking entirely too composed. Alistair leaned on his staff, breathing hard but unharmed.

"Everyone alive?" Kyle asked.

"Barely," Alistair said. "You're bleeding."

"It's just a scratch." Kyle looked down at his leg. "Okay, it's a pretty deep scratch. But I've had worse paper cuts."

Selere knelt beside him, tearing a strip from her cloak. "Let me." Her hands were surprisingly gentle as she bound the wound. "You fought well. For a human."

Kyle winced as she tightened the bandage. "High praise."

They found the cliff an hour later, deeper in the cave system where the tunnels opened into a massive cavern. A waterfall cascaded down the far wall, feeding a dark pool far below. The ledge they stood on jutted out over the drop, slick with moisture and ancient moss.

Alistair approached the edge cautiously, his staff glowing brighter as he peered into the darkness. "The goblins must have used this as a lookout. You can see the entire lower cavern from here."

Selere joined him, her arm brushing against his. "It's beautiful. In a dangerous, drop-to-your-**** kind of way."

Kyle hobbled up behind them, still favoring his injured leg. "Great view. Really worth the stab wound." He sat down heavily on a flat rock, letting his legs dangle over the edge. The drop was dizzying—easily a hundred feet down to the pool below.

Alistair sat beside him, then Selere on Kyle's other side. The three of them stared out at the underground vista, the waterfall's roar filling the silence.

"So," Kyle said eventually, "not to ruin the moment, but how do we get back? I'm pretty sure I can't climb with one good leg."

Alistair sighed. "There's a path on the other side of the pool. We'll have to go down and across."

"Down?" Kyle looked over the edge again. "As in, down down?"

Selere laughed, the sound echoing off the cavern walls. "Don't worry, human. I'll catch you if you fall."

Kyle glanced at her, then at Alistair. The dark elf's hand had found its way to Alistair's knee, and Alistair hadn't moved it away. The tension from earlier—the oral lesson, the awkwardness—seemed to have settled into something quieter. Something almost comfortable.

"You know," Kyle said, leaning back on his hands, "for a cave full of ****-goblins and certain ****, this isn't the worst afternoon I've had."

Alistair raised an eyebrow. "What was the worst?"

Kyle thought about it. "Probably the time I ate an entire family-sized lasagna and then tried to beat a boss fight. The heartburn was legendary."

Selere stared at him. "I cannot tell if you're joking."

"I never joke about digestive health."

Alistair shook his head, but there was a smile tugging at his lips. "You're strange, Kyle."

"Thank you." Kyle grinned. "I try."

They sat in silence for a while longer, the waterfall's thunder filling the space where words should have been. Kyle watched the way Selere leaned into Alistair, the way Alistair's arm eventually came up to wrap around her shoulders. It was so sweet, really. Almost enough to make Kyle consider not being a total creep.

Then Selere turned to Kyle, her violet eyes gleaming in the dim light. "So," she said, her voice low, "about that lesson earlier..."

Well, that changed things in Kyle's mind real fast. "If you want to continue-"

Alistair stiffened. "Selere—"

"I'm just saying." She smiled, slow and dangerous. "We have some time before we need to climb down. And Kyle's leg needs to rest."

Kyle's eyebrows shot up. "Are you suggesting what I think you're suggesting? Because we're on a cliff. Over a very deep drop. And I'm pretty sure that's how people die in adventure stories."

Selere's hand drifted to his thigh, just above the bandage. "Then we'll be careful."

Alistair made a sound somewhere between a groan and a whimper. "This is not how I imagined this expedition going."

Kyle looked at him, then at Selere, then back at the waterfall. The spray misted his face, cool and refreshing. His leg throbbed. His pulse was doing something entirely different.

"You know what?" he said, leaning back further. "When in Rome."

Selere's grin widened. "Where's Rome?"

"Exactly," Kyle said. "Let's just be careful about the whole falling-to-our-deaths thing."

Alistair buried his face in his hands. But he didn't say no.