Come down off the cross, we can use the wood, you gotta come on up to the house

“Duh… Dakota?” Mary scrambled to her feet in surprise, her mouth flopping open. The malicious host was the last person she expected to run into here. “What… what are you doing here?”

Dakota’s lips twisted into a sneer. “You mean, how can I cross the threshold of a church without bursting into flames?” The bitter venom in her voice made Mary wince.

“No…” she said quietly, shaking her head. “That’s not… what I meant…”

Dakota’s golden eyes flashed and she stepped forward, her cane clacking loudly through the silent hall as she approached the front of the church. There was an air about her that Mary found unsettling, and she stirred, looking nervously at the other woman.

And then the two of them were facing each other.

Mary gazed deeply into the other woman’s eyes, not sure what to make of the intensity she saw within them. Something about Dakota was just… off.

She didn’t know how to describe it.

“…Did you come here to pray?” She wondered aloud.

Dakota’s eye twitched. “…And why would I want do that?” She asked coldly, leaning forward. Mary felt the unsettling pressure of her gaze, and knew that the host was trying to intimidate her. But she refused to allow herself to be intimidated, and stood her ground.

“I don’t know why,” she answered honestly, shaking her head. “But I do know that prayer is a method of getting closer to God. If you open your heart to Him then the light of His grace will fill you and you will receive His blessings.”

Dakota made a face like she was sucking on a lemon. “…I do believe this is the part of you I hated the most, Mary,” she cruelly declared, narrowing her eyes into slits. She reached out and cradled Mary’s rosy cheek in her cold, icy hand, and squeezed, feeling the woman flinch before her. “Now, I do quite enjoy your devotion to Nick… if you want to know what ‘fills’ my heart, that would be a good place to start. But the religious fundamentalism? No, no thank you.”

Mary felt an involuntary shudder run through her body from Dakota’s icy touch. But she held her ground. “But… you still came to church,” she pointed out, throwing Dakota’s hypocrisy in her face. Like any Christian, Mary was quite familiar with hypocrisy.

Dakota glared at her. She pulled back her hand like she’d been burned by Mary’s warm skin.

“I didn’t come here to pray,” Dakota snapped at her. “The only reason I came here was because I knew you were here, that’s all.”

Mary blinked. “But… you could have done that at any time,” she quietly pointed out. “If you just wanted to get me alone, to talk, or whatever, I was alone in the elevator. And I was alone on the walk here. You’re always watching, right? But you waited until I began praying to come… so the only motive I can deduce from that is you wanted to talk to me here, in my house of worship. Is that not correct?”

Dakota’s sulky expression let Mary know her deduction was right on the money.

“…I really despise you,” the host growled, tightening her grip on her cane. “You know that? You’ve got Nick perfectly wrapped around your finger. He adores you, he hangs off your every word, everyone on the show just LOVES you even though you’re perhaps one of the most aggravating people in Nick’s harem. It fucking makes me sick to my stomach. Acting all selfless and noble, pretending to be such a great human being all the time… at least back when you were talking about religion and holding all those moral crusades against the show, you were fun to torment, but now you don’t even have that… you’re just a little nice girl now. ‘Pretty Mary Sunlight’ as Sylvia liked to call you.”

Dakota was really bringing out the knives. But Mary didn’t even blink.

“People change,” she said simply, holding her head up high. “That’s the nature of this show of yours, isn’t it?”

Her body was a testament to those changes. And in a way so was Dakota’s.

“That’s all you have to say?” Dakota glowered at her. “‘People change’?”

Mary just stared at her with a serene smile on her face. “I know I’m not your favorite contestant, Dakota,” she mused, shaking her head and making her pigtails bounce. “You’re wrong about one thing, I’m not selfless, and I’m about as far from noble as it gets.”

Dakota raised a curious eyebrow. “Oh?”

“I’m just human,” Mary continued, placing her hand over her chest. “I get jealous and lonely like everyone else. Right now, my husband is out with another woman. The man I love is finding comfort and security with somebody else. Just like he did last night, and the night before that. And each day, I have to sit up in that cold, empty room and go about my business, tidying up the home he’ll return to every night with another woman on his arm. Then I’ll smile, and welcome him back, and I’ll pretend like it isn’t agonizing to see him with someone else. As if I’m… not enough for him.”

For the first time, Dakota made an expression of genuine surprise. She clutched her cane tightly and leered at Mary, twisting her lips into a sneer. “Well, that’s certainly-”

“But I will not stop loving him,” Mary said firmly, her heart swelling with pride. “I am happy when Nick is happy. That’s what it means to love someone. So even if I will never be enough for him, just loving him is enough for me. And when I come to church and bare my soul to Him, I can relieve myself of those horrible feelings and feel close to Him in doing so.”

Dakota raised her eyebrow. “Him… you mean God?”

Mary smiled and nodded. “My heavenly father,” she confirmed. “The one whose light grants salvation and absolution to all those who will listen.”

Back to sucking on a lemon for Dakota.

“Yeah… I don’t need any of that crap,” she muttered, shaking her head. “Go on and delude yourself with fantasies, Mary. But God isn’t real. If He was, then He wouldn’t allow this twisted show to exist, now would he?”

She raised her arms and looked around, as if she were waiting to be struck down from the heavens for her blasphemy.

Mary just smiled evenly at her and remained undaunted.

“Do you think so?” She tittered, shaking her head. “Dakota, the lord works in mysterious ways. There is no way for us humans to understand His plans, so-”

“Oh that’s such a fucking copout!” Dakota snapped, striking her cane hard on the ground. She began to pace, tugging at the long fringe of hair framing her face furiously. “You’re all like this, you fucking religious freaks. ‘Oh, God intended it to be that way!’ ‘Oh, He meant to do that!’ ‘It’s God’s plan!’ It’s reeeeaaaal fucking convenient when you can ascribe any positive or negative thing that happens in your life to this vague fucking plan for the future that God has written down for you!”

“I know, isn’t it?” Mary chirped, enjoying Dakota’s meltdown in spite of the blasphemy. While the past Mary might have gotten roped into a furious debate with her, that was no longer the case. Mary didn’t need to justify her beliefs to anyone.

Certainly not someone like Dakota.

It did make her curious, though.

“Do you not believe in God?” Mary asked. She avoided bringing up the topic of religion Dakota out of consideration for the other woman’s circumstances, but given that Dakota had intentionally sought her out here in this church, she figured that she should take this chance while it was presented to her.

After all… Dakota had died and come back to life.

Dakota turned to Mary, and there was a tiredness in her eyes.

“Where is He?” She asked in exasperation, raising her arms in a resigned shrug. “I’m waiting.”

Mary frowned. “It doesn’t work that way,” she said quietly, shaking her head.

“No fucking shit.”

Dakota sighed and rolled her eyes, then pinched the bridge of her nose. “You know what God is to me, Mary? You really wanna know?”

Mary had a feeling Dakota would tell her regardless.

“God is supposed to be this all-powerful, almighty figure with this grand plan for you, right?” Dakota taunted the other woman with a sneer. “He makes the rules, and then tells you that you have to obey. And if you don’t, well, bad things will happen to you then. But hey, so long as you believe in Him and do what He tells you to do, everything will work out for the better, right? …Wait, no. You’ll still have a miserable life where everything can go wrong, and if you try to complain about it, well, ‘God works in mysterious ways!’ and all that crap. So let me tell you, Mary, if I have to worship an omnipotent being who has ultimate authority over my life and my afterlife, if I have to follow some nebulous ‘divine plan’ for my existence, I’ll take the one who I can actually hold a fucking conversation with, even if he is a monster.”

The chapel began to rumble. Dakota’s little demonstration of blasphemy had clearly caught the attention of somebody.

Mary was pretty sure it wasn’t God, though.

“…You’re talking about that producer, right?” She asked quietly. “Mr. S?”

Dakota’s only answer was a glare.

Mary swallowed. “…I see. That… must be difficult for you, then,” she murmured, looking at Dakota with something far too rare for her to see these days. Sympathy. “To be so at the mercy of some ultimate figure, without the ability to change it… that must be hard.”

Dakota snorted in disbelief. “Are you fucking with me right now, girl? You’re a Christian.”

Mary nodded, a brilliant smile spreading across her lips. “Yes, and I talk to Him every day with my prayers,” she pointed out. “Because it helps me feel close to Him. And I know that He is looking out for me. Is Mr. S… looking out for you, Dakota?”

Dakota gave her another sulky look. Mary knew the answer to that question. “Well, aren’t you just the little sadist?” She snarled.

Mary looked sadly at her.

“…Why did you come here, Dakota?” She asked again. “Better question… why does this place even exist?”

When Mary first arrived on this island she didn’t question the existence of a church. She’d figured that Sylvia had created it, knowing that she would be one of the contestants on the island. But that assumption had come back before Mary knew what she knew now; Sylvia had not originally been the host in power on this island, Dakota had been.

So why would Dakota have made this church? ...Assuming she did make it.

Mary gazed into Dakota’s eyes, and saw her pale lips slowly curl into a cruel smirk.

“…You’re not the first of your kind on this island, you know,” Dakota informed her. “Plenty of seasons I’ve run… have had a religious fundamentalist, like you. Holding so strictly to your morals, your beliefs, your… faith. And one way or another… I’ve twisted and warped them, molded them into hedonists and sinners… it’s delightful, really.”

Mary could tell from the venom in Dakota’s tone that she was trying to pick a fight. Trying to make Mary upset, uncomfortable.

Mary refused to take the bait.

“We are all sinners, Dakota,” she said simply. “In our own ways. That is why He absolves us of our sins, when we confess them to Him. By acknowledging our wrongdoing and striving to do better each day, we can get a little closer to God every time. A life of atonement and growth. It isn’t easy… but it can be very rewarding.”

Dakota looked at her in shock and slowly shook her head. “Nonsense,” she muttered bitterly. “Complete fucking nonsense.”

“Is it?” Mary didn’t think so. “Have you ever sought absolution for your sins, Dakota? Have you ever prayed, confided in Him, asked for forgiveness?”

Dakota’s glare was more than enough to answer THAT question.

“You’ve gotta be fucking kidding.”

“I am not.” Mary was more serious about this than she’d ever been. She stepped forward and took Dakota’s hand in hers. “Pray with me, Dakota,” she offered. “Confess your sins to Him, and open your heart to Him. Perhaps then, you will be able to find absolution and forgiveness.”

If she was truly remorseful, anyway. With the weight of all the sins Dakota had accumulated, Mary genuinely couldn’t be sure that the wicked woman would ever be able to atone for them. She had harmed a great many people.

But that wasn’t what her faith told her.

“You’ve gotta be fucking kidding,” Dakota said again, tearing her hand away from Mary’s. “You want me to fucking pray?”

“Isn’t that why people come to churches?” Mary asked her. “To seek help from something greater than themselves? You’re no different, Dakota. You’re lost. But He can help you find your way. He can save you, if you’re willing to open up your heart to Him.”

Dakota threw back her head and laughed. “Oh, perfect! Just fucking perfect! All this time, this whole fucking season, it’s all coming down to this? Magic Mary and her invisible sky daddy save the soul of the wicked host, and we all get along and become friends! Not even the dullards in the audience would accept an outcome like that, so I think I’ll pass.”

Mary didn’t mind the slander Dakota was throwing at her beliefs. And she even understood Dakota’s perspective a little, and why the other woman was not exactly enthused at the prospect of opening her heart to Mary and her religion.

But all Mary could do was extend a hand to her.

“I know you don’t believe in Him, Dakota,” she said gently. “But you came here to find me, instead of anywhere else I planned to be today. And I think you did that for a reason. I think some part of you genuinely does want to change. To become a better person. To find… redemption. Is that wrong?”

She wanted Dakota to say that she was wrong. That she was stupid, even. It would reassure her all the more that she was correct.

Mary knew about stubborn. She was as stubborn as they came. And Dakota, she could tell, was even more stubborn- trying to get through to her was almost impossible.

But Mary had to try.

It’s what Nick would do. He wouldn’t give up on her. He’d keep holding out his hand to her, to try and get her to change. And I have to do the same.

She wouldn’t abandon Dakota like everyone else. Even if she really couldn’t stand the other woman.

Dakota’s sneer was getting a lot of play today.

“…Look at you,” she muttered, shaking her head. “Pretty Mary Sunlight. The perfect little domestic wife. Trying to even save me, because you’re just so fucking nice.”

“I’d like to think of it as returning the favor, actually,” Mary said simply.

Dakota stared at her. “…Huh?”

The notion that Mary owed her a favor was completely asinine. What could she have ever done for the other woman that would lead her to-

“You were the one who helped me find my place with my husband,” Mary said, placing her hand over her exposed belly. “Those pills you bought for me… and then… on my wedding…”

She raised her head and looked around the empty church. “…That was the last time we were here together, wasn’t it?” She recalled. “My wedding…”

Mary still remembered the way Dakota held her down and **** those pills down her mouth. She’d been working Mary hard that round, in order to get her to loosen up and embrace… what did she call it again?

Right, hedonism and sin.

Well, Mary didn’t feel like a hedonist. Or a sinner. She was a woman who loved her husband, and Dakota had helped her embrace that love.

It would be wrong of her to not help Dakota now embrace God’s love in return.

“I don’t know what it is that’s weighing on your heart, Dakota,” Mary said gently, wishing she could ease the suffering the other woman was grappling with. “But even I can see that you’re going through something difficult, aren’t you?”

Dakota clenched her fist tightly around her cane and glowered at the redhead. “Watch yourself, girl,” she threatened Mary. “Watch yourself…”

“What happened?” Like a detective in one of her **** mysteries, Mary had picked up the scent of something serious, and she wasn’t going to back down from it. “Tell me, Dakota, I want to know. What happened to you? What made you come to see me today?”

Dakota gnashed her teeth, a guttural sound welling up in her throat that refused to define itself with words.

“You can’t tell me?” Mary guessed, taking another step forward. She wasn’t scared of Dakota. Not here, in this church.

“You… all of you fucking women…” Dakota hissed, staring murderously at the redhead, tugging at her hair like a lunatic. “Why can’t you all just leave me the fuck alone!?”

Was she kidding right now?

“YOU came to ME,” Mary reminded her, irritated. “And now you’re saying that I’m the one who needs to leave YOU alone? Are you kidding right now?”

Dakota snarled something indecipherable.

“Mary-”

“I’m not a priest, but I can still take your confession,” Mary said gently. “Tell me. I promise- I won’t tell anyone. Not Sylvia. Not Nick. Not Amelia. Nobody. I swear.”

Even Dakota knew how sacred a promise was to Mary. If she promised not to tell anyone, then she would keep that promise.

But did that even make a difference to her?

“…I can’t,” Dakota spat out, pulling her eyes away from Mary’s. “Don’t you fucking get it!? I can’t! There’s no POINT! You think saying a few words and praying in front of some old hippie nailed to a cross is going to change anything!? You think it’s going to fix me!? Gonna make me some magic fucking little goodie two shoes? Well in that case, you really are an idiot, because shit like this can’t BE fixed, Mary! When are you going to get that through your thick fucking skull, huh!?”

“Confessing your sins to Him isn’t about fixing things, or about obtaining forgiveness from others,” Mary said, shaking her head. “It is about opening your heart to Him and letting Him give you the strength to forgive yourself.”

“…And what if I can’t?” Dakota asked quietly.

“It isn’t about ‘can’t’ or ‘won’t’,” Mary corrected her, shaking her head again. “It’s about having the strength to try. It’s about acknowledging the wrong you’ve done… and opening your heart up to absolution.”

Dakota looked like she wanted to scream. She looked like she wanted to kill somebody.

“…How would I even begin?” She finally asked. “When I don’t even know… how I’m supposed to feel about what I’ve done?”

“You can talk about it,” Mary said, taking Dakota’s hand again. “That seems like a good way to start, if you ask me.”