Mom 3 - Snap

As awkward as this whole enounter was for you, at least your mom is driving you home. Zoey has snagged the passanger's seat, so you're sitting in the back.

"And I've been going there twice weekly ever since." Theresa finishes her story, having finally found someone to share her riveting pilates tales with. Not that Zoey is particularly into pilates, but she - apparently oblivious to how incredibly weird it is - had asked her how she manages to 'stay in such great shape'.

"Well, I dunno much about it, but it seems to work." she then comments, making no effort to hide her glances.

"Oh, everyone has their own ways of staying fit." responds the older woman. "But I don't have to tell you of all people, do I? Those muscles do talk for themselves."

You want to puke.

"Ah, it's nothing." Zoey waves her off, but the way she flexes by putting her arms behind her head betrays her fake ass modesty.

"Oh, it's not. Believe me, most men I've been with haven't even had muscles like that." Theresa keeps going and you wonder how much it would hurt to jump out of the car at this speed.

"Well and I haven't been with a woman your age with a bod like that." Zoey counters and what the fuck is going on.

"Alright, I'm gonna ask politely." you intervene, your discipline to keep your voice down almost impressing yourself as you lean forward between the two front seats. "Can my MOM and my GIRLFRIEND please stop flirting?"

"Flirting? My goodness, Ronny, whatever gave you that idea?" your mother defends herself and this woman is so full of shit it's crazy. Zoey doesn't even say anything herself, instead she just grins to herself.

"Whatever. Mom, why don't you tell us about the hotel again?" you suggest, hoping her ability to ramble will give her something else to do.

"Ah, that's a great idea!" she exclaims, overjoyed. "I haven't even talked about the bathrooms yet! Honey, if you ever want to experience luxury, that is the way to go! The shower? A-ma-zing. As if you're standing under a waterfall and there's more than enough space for two. Or even three if you're that adventurous."

"Adventurous, huh?" Zoey chimes in and shoots her a mischievous smile.

"Yes, adventurous." you quickly intervene, trying to stop any potential tension to come back up. "Everyone loves adventures. We've all seen Lord of the Rings and shit."

Yeah, you don't even know anymore. Regardless, it does its job and the conversation stirs away from the subject. God, you could kill both of them right now. Sure, Zoey is probably just fucking with you, but you KNOW she would. You like to assume she woudn't actually since it's your bloody mother, but if Theresa was just a random woman, there's no doubt. And for your mom - hell, she'd probably do it no matter the fucking circumstances. Like jesus, this hag is out of control.

Whatever, you've arrived. After finding a parking lot, the three of you exit the car and stand on the sidewalk.

"Well, time's up already." Theresa laments and gives you a quick hug. "It was lovely seeing you, honey. Both of you."

"Pleasure." Zoey returns and shakes her hand.

"Do visit some time, will you?" your mom says but luckily to you and not to your girlfriend. Well, maybe she means you both.

"Sure." you deadpan back at her, eager to end this.

"You make a wonderful young couple, really." Theresa goes on as she walks back around her car.

"Thanks!" Zoey grins and puts an arm around you.

"Take care!" Theresa says and opens the door. "And have fun tonight!" she very unnecessarily adds before vanishing inside. You hear Zoey snort in amusement as the car drives off.

"Hah, she's cool." is the first thing she has to say.

"Do not fuck my mom." is the only thing you reply.

"Pfff, what the hell?" she laughs. "Who said I'd do that?"

"Okay, two things." you start and turn to her. "One, I know you. And two, you don't know my mom." you tell her, accentuating each point with a finger.

"I mean, she is pretty attractive..." starts the futa, trailing off and grinning.

"You know what, fuck off." you snap and leave her side to stomp over to the house. The fucking nerves of her. Like, you can take a tease or two, but fucking read the fucking room.

"Aw, c'mon." you hear her follow you. "I was joking."

You don't honor her with a response. Honestly, if it hadn't taken so much time to unlock the front door, you would've strongly considered just slamming is shut behind you before she caught up. You do, however, make it a petty point to not hold the door open for her.

"Ronya, seriously." she tries again and follows you up the staircase. "I promise, I won't fuck your mom." she adds and the fact that one of your neighbors happens to walk down the stairs in this exact moment is just perfect. You avoid to look at his face, but you can practically smell his confusion.

When you arrive on your floor, standing in front of the door to your flat, you finally turn around to face her.

"This is my place. Not yours." you tell her.

"Wha- oh, come on." Zoey, caught of guard, protests. "It was a joke."

You don't say anything. You just glare at her, waiting for her to leave. Wether you actually want her to or not, you're not sure, but that isn't the point right now.

"Listen, I'm sorry, okay?" she hesitantly apologizes and puts her hands on your hips. You strongly consider swatting them away, but you decide against it. For now.

"Seriously, I swear I won't do anything." she promises and leans closer. "It was all a joke."

"That is not the point." you sigh and cross your arms.

"Then what is it?" Zoey asks, by the looks of it genuinely confused.

"The point is the joke isn't funny!" you answer, getting a bit louder than intended. "It's my fucking mom. And I made it more than clear how uncomfortable I was with all your fucking jokes."

"O-oh, I-, uh..."

"And she doesn't know that! This woman is tone deaf as fuck! Hell, she'd probably actually fuck you if you asked her because she wouldn't fucking see a problem with that! Let alone with some jokes!"

"Look, I'm-"

"But you?? You're not fucking stupid! And if my own mom doesn't get the hint, then YOU surely should! But no, you play along. The entire fucking time! And the moment I wanna talk to you about it, all that comes to your mind is 'well, she is pretty hot'?!"

For the first time ever, you see Zoey truly stunned. Well, to be fair, you did go off far more than intended. Like, damn.

Silence.

"Look... just read the damn room next time, okay?" you eventually tell her after calming yourself down a bit.

"Okay. I will." she replies and averts her gaze.

"In situations like today I need you to have my back and not make it worse."

"I know. I'm sorry." Zoey concedes and looks back at you. "I, uh, I'd like to hug you. Can I do that?"

You ponder for a second. You're pissed, but you also feel bad for yelling at her. Plus, you could REALLY use a hug right now. Thus, you don't say anything. you just uncross your arms and wait. She hesitates briefly, but then she hugs you. So she CAN read the room sometimes.