Mattie Date, Part 1: June Cleaver

Harper

Harper hopes she nailed dressing casual for a date. She made this navy blue top with some subtle ruffles to highlight the fact that her unscarred shoulder is exposed. Harper never thought she’d be a ruffle girl. She also never thought she’d be a braless in public girl, but, given how often she’s gone naked for Skye’s sake, it doesn’t phase her anymore. Her black skirt is pleated and goes down to mid-thigh. Her hipster panties are also navy blue and ruffled. Of course, she’s still wearing her mithril boots (because why bother trying to outdo perfection). She still has a nice section of bare leg between the hem of the skirt and the top of the boots for Mattie to maybe drool about. Her make-up shifted to something subtle and natural looking (or as natural looking as a sea elf can get).

She bounds down the stairs, only to run into Josie and Tina. “Hey, before you go, level us up.”

Checking her phone, she still has maybe 15 minutes before noon, so the three of them head to Dungeons for Damsels. Harper wanted to buy something anyways.

Josie earns 2 levels, getting her the “can stay horny basically forever” feature, some extra bloodlust damage, a whole mess of hit points (and some bonus armor) due to taking the skilled feat, adding +1 to her endurance. Yup. Josie has already passed broken and it’s only getting crazier. Harper likes it.

Tina earns 2 levels too, getting her 4th level witch spells, resistance to radiant damage, and bonus damage when dealing fire or radiant damage from spells. Some of those 4th level spells are going to be quite useful. The bonny bunny is still a little annoyed about breakfast, but the succubus kiss she gets between levels makes her happy.

Harper is (finally) going to spend some BP. She has that other transformation from the Round 2 vote she really wanted:

Well Rounded Student of the Weave – Or perhaps expanding her knowledge of magic would better suit her nature as she conquers her sluts? Harper gains both the Artificer Initiate and a (modified) Eldritch Adept feats. For the Eldritch Adept feat, Harper starts with 1 Eldritch Invocation (granted from an appropriate being of her choice), plus 1 for every Bladesinger feature granting level she has earned. For purposes of selecting Invocations, she is considered to have the Pact of the Blade, the Pact of the Tome, and the Pact of the Chain (Wizard).

She purchases it and starts making her choices. Yup. Battlemaster maneuvers are much more useful than warlock invocations to a melee focused wizard. Eldritch Smite is cool though. And a couple of these have some edge case use to them. A free Cure Wounds cast (plus getting to add that to my spell list) is definitely a useful thing to have in the back pocket. I’ll wait on using that last level on myself, though. Who knows what Mattie has in store for me. Oh, gotta go.

Harper: -100 BP

Harper gives Tina a kiss goodbye, waves at Josie, then books it into the Green Room.

Mattie

Damn, Sarge cleaned up nice. Though I do wish she had her tits out. Nice thing about Mrs. Skye’s clothes transformation is that Sarge puts herself on display so much. Still...

“Hey Mattie. Where is everyone?”

“Just you and me, Sarge,” Mattie coos, slipping her arms around Harper’s waist, “Figured you can use a break from saving the world. Just as normal of a date as we can have here. What do you say?”

Harper leans into the half hug and whispers, “Sounds good, Cap’n. You normally wear stuff like that on a date?”

Mattie smirks as she steps back, spinning around to let Harper take in the effect. She turned a pink bandeau bra with little lacy cut-outs into a leather tube top and some white with pink striping athletic shorts into leather booty shorts that would make Josie jealous. Not her usual color scheme, but the contrast from normal was part of her outfit’s charm. Finally, some cute little ankle boots. No underwear, because adding a second layer of leather or latex to the mix is just going to make her more uncomfortable.

Mattie spanks her ass and winks over her shoulder, “Ah, you know, just somethin’ I threw together. Now you? You, Sarge looks absolutely adorable. I love how subtly naughty you’re being. No bra? How risque! I don’t have to imagine how delectable your little blue nips are, what with them pokin’ out on your shirt. Were you a total slut and came on your date with little ol’ me without any panties on? I wonder...”

The way Sarge turns darker and darker blue just eggs Mattie on. Too soon, Harper pulls Mattie into a deep kiss just to shut her up. Mattie smells the faint scent of arousal dripping off of her. She pulls back to mock-threaten, “If you make me cream them this early into the date, you’re wearing them for the rest of it.”

Sticking out her tongue, Mattie lets her inner brat out for a moment, “Can’t, unless you were kinky enough to wear leather or latex panties.”

“If you two are done,” Prudence interrupts, “Here are your quests. Enjoy.”

Scarlet

Skye made lunch and everyone has gathered for it. Now’s as good a time as any.

“So, family meeting time. We haven’t had one of these in a hot minute, have we? We need to talk about the wish. I assume our plan is still in place?”

Aelene, who wasn’t here when the original 6 talked initial strategy, asks, “What was the plan?”

“Basically, we come to a consensus about the contents of the wish, based on the rules laid out, and whoever wins the game makes the wish the group decided upon.”

Glitterdust, who must have really angered Harper yesterday (since Harper left her in rope transformation mode), bellows, “THIS ONE does not like that arrangement! It is against the spirit of the game! The winner of the wish should wish what she wants! Plus, it’s not like the consensus would agree with THIS ONE’S desire for more sexy women blossoming forth from gross boys.”

Scarlet starts to feel a migraine coming on. Josie expresses the sentiment, “Dragon, you don’t get a vote about how the contestants use their wish. Though, I’m sure if you want something reasonable, the winner will accommodate you, assuming we ignore your advice about tossing the plan out the window.”

“What about Ms. Mattie?”

“I talked to her during her morning run. She sent a video to everyone where she said that she’s cool with our original plan and would get back to us for what she wants. She wants more recon about our new world first. That’s her plan for tomorrow, if any of you want to join her.”

After checking phones (and some sending replies), the meeting gets back on track. Aelene doesn’t need convincing. Thus begins the girls working through generic parts of the wish. Things that could be good regardless of the nuances of a world most of them have only visited. Scarlet feels like they are accomplishing something with all of this. Hopefully, they will get enough of it done to where no issues arise when the time comes.

Harper

The two of them find themselves in the entryway of a simple two-story family home. Mattie smirks and silently motions Harper to move forward. The sea elf complies, swishing her skirt. What she sees in the living room takes her aback. A cozy little living room, with pictures of... them?

Harper walks towards one and picks it up. Mattie and a female version of her (pre-turning blue), smiling at a camera at a beach somewhere. That Mattie is wearing a drab green bikini and that her is in a more sensible hunter green one-piece, with a big floppy straw hat on. I always hated sunburns.

Mattie wraps her arms around Harper’s waist and tucks her chin into the crook of Harper’s neck. “Ah, from our honeymoon in Cancun. You were so helpful, since you actually know Spanish well enough to get us past the gringo tourist spots. And scored us a pretty senorita for our first married threesome. Ah, young love.”

Harper looks at the photo again. Mattie has her trademark smirk on, of course. The surprising bit is that the smile reached the human redhead’s eyes. I’m happy? What?

Anticipating the thought, Mattie snarks, “Of course you’re happy. You have a hot bod, a hot wife, a great life.”

“Is this a figment of your imagination or what?”

“If you must know,” Mattie sighs, “this is a date idea I stole from Fly-Girl’s season. Not a figment of my imagination. That is a real you and a real me from a dimension where we were soul mates. They do exist, you know.”

“Wait, Fly-Girl’s season?”

“Yeah, Fly-Girl. Total hottie, despite being a Navy pilot. Dragon now. Dating a blonde wolf girl. From Mary’s season. Her host kidnapped a Morgan Freeman to narrate movies about how the girl got with Mary’s dorky male form in realities that don’t involve the show?”

Harper thinks a beat or two about that. “So, we took over their lives for a bit?”

“Nah, Sarge. I just had the show make a pocket dimension of their life. Just the two of us here. I’m not going to spoil the surprise of what their bedroom is like, but there are other fun things we can do before then. Like, for example, snoop through their home movies.”

Mattie finds the home theater remote and fires it up. A computer displays a bunch of videos, organized by folder. Mattie clicks on the “Tax Evasion” folder, which opens up a whole lot of their sex tapes. Like, gigabytes worth of sex tapes. Mattie picks one a random. “First one to cum makes lunch, Sarge.”

Honey

This request from Ms. O’Connor is highly unusual. Highly unusual.

Honey is hovering beside one of the mermaids, heavily scarred and wearing an eye patch. Her breasts are as big as Honey’s head, which is unnerving. They are before the Host office door on set. The mermaid, Calypso, opens the door and shimmies inside. Honey follows, the buzzing of her wings a calming drone. Another mermaid is already in there, growling and snarling at the Producer, in cat form.

“What do you mean, those ungrateful brats are showing the proper amount of respect? They said I was a more competent Beckie!”

The cat looks hostile. “Do you wish to undergo a performance review right now, Ms. Ariel? Because that is my summary as well. While you have been reasonably active in your Hosting duties and have added some innovative twists to Ms. Petersen’s formula, you have mostly antagonized Ms. O’Connor, trying to **** her to see her future wives as slaves.”

“Because they are!”

“Do not interrupt me, Ms. Ariel. You are in the minority on that point here. I want Ms. O’Connor to embrace the contestants as wives and lovers, not as property. If you have an issue with that, I see another willing to take the Host mantle from you.”

Ariel turns to look at Calypso, looking aghast, “Sister, you would betray me? Betray the frenzy?”

Calypso sets her jaw to grit out, “Most of the frenzy is in agreement: It would be best if you swam aside. Take a vacation. You have been working so hard for so long. I can take over for mother until you get back.”

Ariel shimmies over to a staff tube and dives in, not saying another word. The producer turns to Calypso. “So, Ms. Calypso, I see you brought Ms. O’Connor’s lawyer along with you. If you want the job, you may have it. But I will be demanding a proper contract first. At least 1 full season after this one. Your frenzy may stay here and my shipments of human semen will continue for as long as you do good work. Has everything been to your frenzy’s satisfaction so far?”

“We would all prefer our egg-stimulation materials straight from the tap, but it is acceptable.”

“So, shall we negotiate, you and I? Or should I be looking elsewhere for a substitute host?”

Mattie

Sarge cheated. No matter, I can cheat too.

Mattie pulls out a couple of meals, pre-made by the alternate Sarge, and places them in the microwave to heat up. Alternate Sarge is an excellent cook. Actual Sarge raises an immaculate eyebrow as she walks in.

“Leftovers, really?”

“C’mon, Sarge. Alternate you is a way better cook than me. If you wanted something from scratch, you should have masturbated to alternate us harder. I do have some lovely dinner reservations at their favorite fancy restaurant, so there’s that.”

Harper sits down at her alternate self’s seat (funnily enough). “Are we going to have to worry about the dress code?”

“Nah. Hotel logic will handle everything. Still, here’s your grub for now.”

After her prayer to Eilistraee, Harper grabs a fork and starts to chow down. Thankfully, Harper doesn’t demand that Mattie join in. A few bites in and Harper declares, “Hey, this is pretty good. My compliments to the chef. Speaking of the chef, how’d these two lovebirds meet?”

“Well, Alternate Mattie was on the shooting team at UST as a handgun girl and Alternate Francine was on the archery team. It was Francine’s last year of eligibility and Mattie was a redshirt freshman. Mattie was heading to the dorms after practice and she saw some frat boys beating the crap out of some dweeb. Mattie tried to intervene, only to get her skull cracked. Francine saw it and pulled the same basic stunt that a certain Sarge did. She almost missed her tryout for the Olympics trying to testify against the frat boys. When Francine made the team, Mattie was there, head still bandaged up, to ask her out on a date, then immediately passed out. First date was in the hospital, sharing stories over terrible hospital jello. And they’ve been inseparable ever since.”

Harper smiles. “How many times does a variation of that story turn out so well?”

“Less often than you think. We seem to work out well as friends, but almost never lovers. Wanna go through the math?”

Harper’s smile turns more neutral. “Sure.”

“Nerd. Okay, so it never works out unless both of us are female. And, for each of us, 85% of the time, we’re born male. So, you got the lucky drop with me.”

“Starting with around 2% odds on the first statement? This is not looking great for us, is it?”

“Hey, Sarge, trust me when I say you and I are gonna break those odds. Still, next set of issues is on me. First, I gotta be into chicks. Easy 95% chance. They literally had to find 2 straight pins in a giant pile of needles for that shitshow first season. Harder, my dad needs to be in the picture. Needs to marry my mom and settle down. My dad randomly knocked up my mom during a one-night stand on a ‘go discover yourself’ trip post college. Sometimes, he bails; sometimes, he’s around, but let’s mom take care of me. There’s about a 40% chance of him doing the right thing. Finally, he needs to work for whatever space agency there is, despite some mistakes he made. Another 40% chance.”

“Less than half a percent odds. How do I make things worse?”

“Again, you and I are the exception that proves the rule. You gotta be into chicks as a chick. Maybe 15% chance of that; you are usually so straight-laced that the thought of being into the ladies never occurs to you. Then, you gotta have your dorky archery draw pull strength you had back in college. You make the team due to your unnaturally powerful pull. Maybe 5% there. Then, you got to be out of your own head enough to recognize that I’m actually into you. Maybe 1% there.”

“Yeah. So, we’re doomed?”

Mattie flicks a pea. Hits Sarge right between the eyes. “Look, we always meet in college. The harder odds for me determines if I go to college. If the problem was me, we never would have met, Sarge. And I will note that you are now a chick into chicks and you can see that I’m into you. So, what’s the draw weight of the bow you have in your inventory?”

“Just a minute. Elves don’t measure draw weight in pounds. Probably double my militia bow?”

“So...”

“Hotel nonsense means we’re compatible?”

“I knew I didn’t fall for a dumb bimbo.”

Mattie: +2 VP (Love Confession)

Harper looks a little confused, but gets up to sit beside Mattie. The sea elf holds onto the soldier’s hand. “I love you, too, but when did that happen?”

Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. SHIT! I didn’t mean to say that so soon. Or that flippantly. Fuck. “Um, when I saw you save me from that asshat Fox guy?”

With a kiss to the cheek, Harper smiles. “I’m happy to be of service, love. Now, what’s next on the itinerary?”