I'm in a Hurry (And Don't Know Why)

Sarah didn't know what she was doing.

She knew better then to let on. She'd learned over the course of her professional career that publicly second-guessing yourself was a quick way to get eaten alive, especially in a male dominated field. She'd seen it firsthand too many times to count. Confidant, competent, poised. It was her mantra. Her reminder to not let the chauvinists and the assholes get to her. A reminder that she had to be better then them, twice as good even, simply because she wasn't born with a cock between her legs. It was stupid. It was juvenile. And it was how the world worked, so until she had the opportunity to tear it all down and remake it in her image it was the reality she had to operate in.

But this wasn't a professional setting, and “Confidant, competent, poised” had gotten her nowhere on the dating scene so now she was doing this. Slutting it up like she was back in college, chasing a good lay.

What was she doing?

Not forty-eight hours earlier she had been trying to organize a resistance to this whole disgusting thing, and now here she sat, sharing nachos with the one man this stupid show was set up to benefit.

Not him. It was set up to benefit Thomas.

Either way, the only one that stood to be a winner at the end of all of this was Robert. Once again, a man was going to reap all of the benefits of the situation simply because of his gender.

So why was she trying so hard on this date?

She couldn't deny that she was trying. The outfit, the location, the food and drink. It had all been carefully picked to present a side of her she didn't typically show, a side she knew Robert had never seen before.

It's because I need to go along with this whole premise until I know more. We need to know more so we can push back more effectively, and that means going with the flow for now.

Or... whispered a small traitorous thought in the back of her mind. Or is it because of another reason...?

Sarah clenched her thighs together and shook her head trying to clear her mind. She would not go down that path. This was simply a first date. She wouldn't do that on a first date back home so there was no reason to do it here.

But you're not home and there are reasons. He can give you something you've always wanted...

Someone was calling her name. She shook her head again, raised her eyes up to Robert's face and smiled. He was looking at her with some concern. She tried to convince herself that she had been staring off into space, not staring at him, and certainly not staring at that part of him...

“You ok?” Robert was asking her over the din of the jukebox. George Strait was blaring from the speakers, singing about the trials and tribulations of a rodeo cowboy.

__

Amarillo by mornin',
Up from San Antone.
Everything that I got,
Is just what I've got on.

__

The sound was slightly distorted from being tuned too loud for the cheap speakers.

“I'm good!” She responded with a fake smile that came naturally.

Robert was peering at her doubtfully. She needed to deflect his attention.

“Sorry,” She confessed with a nervous-sounding laugh and a toss of her hair. “It's been a long time since I've been on date.”

“Well, if it makes you feel any better,” he said, reaching up and nervously scratching the back of his neck, “it's been a while for me too. I mean, besides yesterday...”

She laughed again, this time for real.

In truth, Sarah couldn't remember the last time she had been on a date before today. She knew for sure it was post law school. There had been a handful of opportunities while she was at Stanford, but none of them had really panned out and so she focused on her studies. Once she had passed the bar and landed her first job she finally felt like she could take the time to start seriously looking for a partner to spend her life with. It quickly became a nightmare.

Sure, there were the guys just looking for a quick hook-up to wade through. She had expected that. What she hadn't expected was for so many other men to turn her down for other reason. “Too tall, too flat, too serious,” soon became a familiar refrain. There had always been those douchebags before (well, maybe not the “too serious ones”), but she hadn't had half this much trouble in college landing a guy. She was beginning to accept “Oklahoma Ten but a California Six” as an established law. Not that she had ever considered herself a Ten before, but still.

Sarah's unlucky streak continued as she got busier and busier with work and she slowly stopped going out as often. She convinced herself that she was trying too hard to find a husband, and maybe she needed to just relax some and let it happen. But that had now been what, four, five, maybe even six years ago? The time had just seemed to slip away from her and she was becoming increasingly worried that it never was going to happen.

And Sarah hated just waiting for thing to happen.

You don't have to wait. You could start tonight... The quiet voice whispered.

“So you grew up on a cattle ranch?” Robert asked. “Your parents were farmers?”

She latched onto the conversation hook like a life preserver.

“My dad was a farmer. My mom worked as an elementary school teacher. Dad's family got the land in the 1893 Land Run.”

Robert let out a low whistle.

“That's pretty cool.”

It WAS pretty cool, Sarah thought wryly to herself.

“Is it a big farm?”

Sarah smiled teasingly.

“Acres or heads of cattle?”

“Uhhh...” Robert stumbled, exactly the reaction she was hoping for. It was her favorite way to trip up people that didn't know agriculture.

“200 acres, about 150 head.”

“Is that...that sounds big...” Robert sputtered.

“A big small farm. To be fair, not all of that 200 acres is in pasture.”

“Uh huh.” Robert looked totally lost now. Sarah charitably chalked it up as partially due to the ****. The bar counter around them was becoming littered with beer cans and she was feeling rather tipsy herself.

“That seems like a lot of work for one person.” Robert said.

“I helped out before I left for college and during the summer break, but yes, it was a lot of long days.” Sarah replied. “It's hard work but my dad loved it and I loved doing it with him.”

“What were the best and worst parts?”

Sarah laughed.

“Calving season and calving season. The new calves are so cute, but there's also a lot that can go wrong. Breached calves, abandoned calves, calves getting lost, predators. It's a stressful time.”

They were down to the last few nachos. The remaining chips were soggy and floppy, but no less tasty, soaked in the juices of the toppings that had been piled on top of them. Sarah was picking the chips up awkwardly, just managing to keep any of the juices from running down her arm. Robert wasn't so lucky, and she stifled a laugh as he had to use a napkin to wipe off his forearm.

Sarah found her eyes tracing the contours of his face. Robert had round high cheeks that dropped down into a strong chin. Combined with his clean-shaven face, it gave him a boyish look that belied his thirty years. His brow was knitted as he concentrated on cleaning up the nacho mess that had run down his arm, lending a fake air of gravity to his face. Sarah couldn't call him handsome, but he was definitely cute.

Cute enough to have his children. She could feel her slit clench as the treasonous thought crossed her mind.

Robert had finally finished cleaning up his arm. He looked up, and she saw his eyebrows rise slightly. Sarah suddenly realized that she was leaning towards him, her body reaching out to his. She straightened suddenly, spun her chair to face the bar, and took a deep swig of her beer to avoid Robert's perplexed eyes.

“Sarah I...” Robert looked liked he was racking his brain for the right words. Her stomach dropped and her pussy clenched again as she could see him gather his courage.

Luckily the jukebox saved her.

“I love this song!” She suddenly exclaimed as the first notes of "Copperhead Road" droned forth from the cut-rate speakers.

She grabbed Robert's hand, and **** him to the rough wooden dance floor.

“There's a dance to this song! Do you know it?”

He did not, and Sarah was soon trying to teach Robert the steps while simultaneously trying to remember the line dance herself. By the time the third couplet began it had come back to her.

Kick, kick, kick, kick,

Kick-and-cross, kick-and-cross.

Robert was still struggling.

“Watch!” Sarah called brightly as her feet went out in small kicks, her heels just coming off the floor, her toes pointing up.

Kick, kick, kick, kick,

Stomp-and-turn, right-foot-stomp.

She couldn't help but laugh as Robert started slightly at her boot slamming into the wooden floor with one authoritative stomp, and then another. The turn had brought her around so he was behind her. Unable to see him, she let herself feel the music and dance for the brief moment.

Kick, kick, kick, kick,

Kick-and-cross, kick-and-cross.

When was the last time I went dancing?

Kick, kick, kick, kick,

Stomp-and-turn, right-foot-stomp.

As Sarah turned again, she could see Robert on her left still gamely struggling to find the rhythm.

Kick, kick, kick, kick,

Kick-and-cross, kick-and-cross.

Her movements became looser as she found confidence in the familiar steps.

Kick, kick, kick, kick,

Stomp-and-turn, right-foot-stomp.

She was facing Robert again with the last turn. If he had been following along correctly, he should have had his back to her. Instead, she pivoted and found him standing there, slightly winded, content to watch her dance.

Sarah felt the briefest twinge of self-consciousness. She considered stopping, but instead she flashed a winning smile at Robert and fully gave herself to the music. She reached up to hold the brim of a cowboy hat she was not wearing, and tipped her head as her long legs kicked higher. She could feel his eyes follow her as she pivoted to the left again. It reminded her of her university days when she and her friends would hit the dance floors of the finest dive bars in Stillwater, drawing stares from college boys in various stages of intoxication. It gave her a drunk giddy feeling, and for the moment she could completely forget Harem Hotel and simply dance.

"Copperhead Road" came to an end. Sarah spun in place, face beaming, to face Robert full-on. He was standing there eyeing her appreciatively, his mouth agape in a dopey smile she had seen on countless college guys before. The next song began, the mournful guitar chords of some country ballad. Robert was slowly drifting towards her, evidently looking for a slow dance. Her body was screaming for her to throw herself into his arms, to feel him up against her.

“I think that's enough dancing for me.” Sarah declared abruptly, still beaming. She turned and strode off the dance floor, leaving Robert standing there, his mouth slowly opening and closing like a stunned fish.

******

The walk back to the Ambassador Hotel passed mostly in silence. There was a building tension in that silence, the unspoken question of what would happen in the Master's Suite hanging heavy between them. Sarah dared not break it. She wasn't sure she could trust herself to. As they entered the hotel, and approached the elevator bank she knew it was now or never.

Robert reached out to press the elevator call button, but Sarah stopped him, gently putting her hand over his.

“Robert, I need to talk to you about something before we go up.”

I need you to fucking breed me.

He gave her a questioning look, but lowered his hand. The partying college girl was gone, the no-nonsense manager was back.

“OK…” he replied uncertainly.

Sarah took a deep breath steadying herself, then locked eyes with him.

Such warm brown eyes. Imagine your children having them...

“I don't want to have sex with you tonight...”

Robert's face went slightly red and his eyebrows shot up in surprise.

“I mean, I wasn’t planning on it...” He mumbled.

“Let me finish. I don’t want to have sex with you, but my body does. Does that make sense?”

He gave her a look that made it clear it did not. Sarah sighed, and tried again.

“My transformation is making me very aroused around you. I'm afraid once we're alone in the Master's Suite that I won't be able to resist it, so I'm telling you now that I don't want to have sex with you.”

Sudden realization seemed to spread across Robert's face. His brow knitted over his still-flushed face.

“So do you want me to stop you if you try?” He asked.

NO

“Yes, please.” Sarah kept her face steady but her voice caught.

“Is...” Robert looked like he was struggling to get his words out. “Is there a level of intimacy you are comfortable with tonight? His question ended with an awkward upward inflection, his voice squeaky. “I mean, not to pressure you or anything, just trying to figure out at what point I should stop you.”

You can stop me after I've extracted every last drop of your seed.

“I think avoiding any kind of intimacy would probably be best for tonight. Sorry Robert. I really did have an enjoyable time with you tonight, but I don't want to chance it.”

“It's OK. I mean, it is just our first date.” He semi-joked. “I had a great time too. I didn't expect you to be so...”

Sexy

“Fun?”

Robert winced slightly.

“I was going to say laid-back...”

She laughed, he smiled. The elevator was called and they both stepped in. Sarah picked the farthest corner away from Robert, hoping he couldn't see her hands clenching the elevator handrail behind her for dear life.