It was only a kiss...

"As evolved as we are, at our core, we are still animals."

Katie sat uncomfortably in the auditorium's small chair as the presenter droned on about leveraging people's animal instincts for an advantage. It was actually a seminar Katie had been eager to attend, but at that moment she felt completely unable to care. Her mind was racing about the horrible betrayal she had committed. She found she couldn't focus on the woman presenting the topic whatsoever. Her mind felt so scattered and she felt sick to her stomach. Fortunately, she had plenty of space around her, which helped ease her nerves a bit.

The audience wasn't as crowded as Katie expected and she had to wonder if it was because the presenter was female. She wondered how many of the men at the conference were blatantly misogynistic and wouldn't expect a woman to say anything of value. Granted, with the way the presenter was dressed, Katie also wondered if any of the men in attendance were actually paying attention or just fantasizing about the woman's body. She didn't really care either way, she was just happy to be out of the limelight. Out of the focus of male gaze.

Katie didn’t know if she could trust herself.

When she had come down from the lustful high she’d achieved while taking care of Andrew, the full gravity of what she had done settled in.

She had kissed her boss.

Since the day she first started dating Jake, she had never tasted another man's lips. Years upon years of fidelity and faithfulness gone, and in the name of what? Being a good employee? There was more to it than that, obviously, but the crux of it all came down to her desire to be a goddamn good employee.

"What we interpret as emotional connection might just be an instinctual drive for protection and success," continued the presenter. Her red hair shimmered under the stage lights as she moved across the stage to address the entire audience. She seemed like a really skilled presenter and probably an elite in her field, but it didn't matter to Katie. Nothing at the convention seemed to matter anymore.

She really needed to get her priorities straight.

The only reason Katie came on this trip full of temptation was to improve her skills as an employee because it would make her boss's life better. The reason she began draping herself over her boss was to heighten his social standings and make his life better. She let him touch her body because it would make him happy and make his life better. Her visit to his hotel room was meant to provide him with some stress relief because she wanted to make his life better. She wanted to make Andrew's life better because that's what good employees do!

But they don't kiss their boss!

"Fuck!" Katie yelled inwardly at herself. Fortunately, she managed to keep it within her mind. The presenter continued her seminar, completely unaware of the tumultuous tempest raging within Katie's mind. Katie normally never cursed, but she felt the situation called for it. She had really fucked up. How could she face Jake after this? She couldn't tell him. Not after he had already accused her of cheating with Andrew before. She could only imagine how that would come across, "Oh hey babe, you know how you were worried about me cheating on you with my boss? Well, I totally wasn't cheating on you then, but I ended up kissing him at that convention that I said he wouldn't be at. And not just a simple peck on the cheek either; it was passionate, there was tongue, and we wanted to rip each other's clothes off." She couldn't see any possible way for that conversation to go well.

No, she'd have to keep it a secret, a dirty little omission she'd keep to herself until her deathbed. What he didn't know wouldn't hurt him and, most importantly, couldn't hurt her. He'd never know. He could never know.

"Humans mask instincts with politeness, but deep down, we still respond like animals in a hierarchy." Katie managed to catch the occasional sentence from the presenter, but the context was lost on her. She felt so lost.

Andrew posed an entirely different problem from Jake. What had she done? There was no going back from that. Even if they mutually decided it was a mistake and they would never kiss again, it would still exist in their history. Their relationship would change. Irrevocably.

She needed to quit. Leave Andrew, his company, the convention. She couldn't risk anything getting back to Jake.

It took every ounce of restraint she had to not immediately run out of his room when their lips finally parted and she looked in his eyes. She was horrified by the mistake she made, but she didn't want him to feel like he had done anything wrong. Fortunately, Andrew didn't ask her to stay and cuddle or chat, he just thanked her and excused himself to clean up. She took that opportunity to return to her own hotel room and panic there.

She probably would still be there if Carmella hadn't texted her about the human psyche seminar. Fortunately, Andrew and Martin had another acquaintance to meet with, leaving just her and Carmella to attend this seminar. Katie looked to her friend sitting beside her. When all was said and done, she'd probably have to cut off all communication with Carmella too.

No loose threads.

Carmella had her head in her phone again and was obviously only half-paying attention to the seminar, granted that was still significantly more than Katie, who was too caught up in her own head to listen to a single word of the presentation. Carmella was dressed in a matching baby pink blazer and mini skirt combo. She didn't appear to be wearing anything under the jacket, which meant she offered a generous view of her enhanced cleavage. The blazer was adorned with large golden buttons that matched her dangling earrings. Despite only knowing each other for a little longer than a day, Katie was upset that she'd have to leave their friendship behind. She was sure there were many other pieces of wisdom that the woman could impart upon her. She was like a wealth of knowledge into an unfamiliar world.

"Every action we take is either to seek pleasure or avoid pain. The animal brain makes this decision before we rationalize it," the presenter said in a particularly emphatic way, but Katie didn't bother looking up. She glanced at Carmella's phone and saw that she was touching up a photo of the two of them in the yoga studio. It seemed impossibly meticulous, but Carmella flew around the photo with ease. "Aren't there filters you can use to do that quicker?" Katie whispered. She was thankful that her mind managed to push out a thought that wasn't about the kissing catastrophe.

Without pausing her work, Carmella leaned over and whispered back, "They exist, but trust me, they don’t look nearly as good, and I actually like doin’ it myself."

"Really?" Katie was shocked. It looked incredibly tedious.

"Sure, it's actually my favorite part of postin' photos, y'know? If you're gonna do somethin', you may as well find a way to enjoy it, doncha agree?" A woman from a few rows forward turned back and shot them a scolding look. Carmella looked away from her phone long enough to wave her hand as if to say, "Yea, sorry. We'll shut up."

Katie straightened up in her seat to listen to the seminar, but without the distraction from Carmella, she felt her mind begin to float away again. The dark clouds in her head began to descend, forecasting another awful storm. She was **** to not fall again into the sinkhole of her thoughts, so she fixed her eyes on Carmella's phone and watched her work. It was captivating and almost mesmerizing, and it gave Katie a chance to think about something other than Andrew. What Carmella said really rang true with Katie. If you're going to do something, you may as well find some way to enjoy it. It was so simple, but it really resonated with Katie. Life was too short to be stuck doing something you didn't like. Since the dawn of man, people had been coming up with ways to make awful tasks feel enjoyable. Whether it was using songs to make menial jobs bearable, or weaving lessons into games or fables, people were always trying to make chores pleasurable. Was that just a facet of the human condition? Was that an inevitability? After all, why wouldn't a person find a way to make their work pleasurable?

Katie thought back to the past couple months. Work became a lot more fun when she started dressing in sexy clothes around the office. It was such a little thing and it hardly affected her output, but it definitely made work more enjoyable. It made her excited to go to work. She remembered humming even as she walked to work in a blizzard. She was happy because she knew she'd get to wear a cute skirt or some stylish shoes... or both.

She'd hate to have to work somewhere that required a dress code.

And she might have to if she left Andrew.

Like a black hole of despair, Katie's misdemeanor once again pulled her attention back to her present situation. She had really fucked up. Everything was going so well for her, but now...

Why had she kissed her boss? Why didn't she just do her job and take care of his problem? Why did she go that extra step?

She thought back to that moment. They were together on the couch, she had her hand on his erection and she was stroking. He had wanted to touch her, hell, SHE wanted him to touch her, but she didn't let him. She had been proud of herself for her restraint in that situation, even though she really wanted him to touch her. She had wanted so much more. She wanted to feel pleasure like he was feeling. She wanted to be able to enjoy it too.

It really wasn't fair. He was able to sit back and enjoy her attention, while she was left with nothing... But fair or not, she had to do it. She had to soothe his frustrations... She had to...

Katie's eyes opened wide as an epiphany shed a blinding light on her situation. Why hadn't she realized it before? Of course she had kissed Andrew. She was stuck doing a task, a job for her boss, something as menial as a moving her hand back and forth, of course she was going to find a way to enjoy herself. It was only natural. Instinctual. Her mind wanted pleasure and so her body found it.

At her core, she was still an animal, right? That's all.

Katie breathed a sigh of relief. She almost felt energized, reinvigorated, as her realization began washing away some of her guilt. Granted, she wasn't completely absolved of her sins, she had still made a stupid mistake, but it was one she could avoid making from now on. Armed with new knowledge, Katie was certain she could make sure it would never happen again. She'd have to explain it all to Andrew, and they'd have to figure out some other way to satisfy her need to enjoy things, but he was a mature man: Katie was sure they could figure it out.

Katie breathed another sigh of relief. She was excited, buzzing even, but her mind finally felt at ease. She had an understanding and a solution, she didn't need to think of anything else. Her mind could take a break. The awful feeling in her stomach could dissipate.

Katie set her eyes on the gorgeous redhead giving the presentation. She didn't know how much of the seminar she had missed, but she figured she may as well make the most of it and enjoy what was left.

**

"Your account is really picking up steam," said Carmella.

Katie laughed. The two of them were walking out of the auditorium amongst many of the other attendees. "Did you even pay attention to the seminar at all?"

"Of course," Carmella responded. "People are animals. They want sex, safety, and comfort. You’ve got to appeal to their instincts, yada yada yada."

Katie smiled and rolled her eyes. She really admired Carmella for her carefree demeanor. Granted, Carmella could afford to live a carefree life: she was practically a trophy wife. There was no way Carmella would find herself in a situation where she committed an act of infidelity to impress her boss. Still, Katie was almost glad it happened. It was a mistake, and mistakes were an opportunity to learn. She had learned something about herself, about her instincts, and she knew that she and Andrew would be able to implement a plan to mitigate any future indiscretions. She would just have to find Andrew and tell him the truth. After all, it was important that she was open and honest with him.

"Ah, just the two lovely ladies I was looking for."

Carmella and Katie turned around to see Martin briskly striding toward them, phone in hand as if he’d need it at any given moment.

"Hey, baby," cooed Carmella as she bounced toward him. They embraced and kissed, and Katie admired how great they were as a couple. They were really lucky to have found each other.

"What’s going on?" asked Carmella once they finished their greeting. "Aren’t you still supposed to be meeting with-"

"No, no," said Martin dismissively. "That got cut short, unfortunately. But I have something I need to discuss with Katie."

His warm, wise eyes snapped to Katie, locking onto her with intent.

Katie would have felt concerned if it weren’t for Martin’s calming and friendly smile. She was sure this had something to do with her rendezvous with Andrew earlier, but she could tell from his demeanor that she didn’t have anything to worry about.

“Why don’t you run off to our hotel room?” said Martin to Carmella, his gaze once again fixed on his partner. “I’m feeling rather famished, so I thought it might be fun to order some room service and spend some quality time together.”

Carmella beamed in his arms, and said "You're just too sweet to me!" She quickly turned to Katie, "Isn't he just the sweetest?!"

Katie smiled and nodded back. They were really cute together.

"OK, get going and order what you want. I won't be long," said Martin. He turned her around and smacked her on the bum. Carmella gave a delighted squeal before scurrying off in her pink pencil skirt and white pumps. They watched Carmella disappear into the waning evening crowd of the convention before Martin turned to Katie. He waved her over to a nearby bench and then tapped on his phone.

"Come over here, I have something I want to show you."