The X-Ray Spex

"Hey," said Bonnie, nudging Susie. "Isn't that your boyfriend Ben?"

"He's not my boyfriend," Susie said, in a cross tone. "He's just Ben."

"I think he's your boyfriend," said Bonnie, in a sing-song lilt as they watched Ben wander through the crowded lanes of Sideshow Alley. The tall, slender boy, nerdy yet curiously attractive with his slim frame and dark floppy hair, was peering curiously at his surroundings, as if he saw something in the passing crowds that was invisible to normal eyes. "Susie and Ben, sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G."

"Just because he's in my math class doesn't make him my boyfriend."

"You talk about him all the time."

"Only to complain about him. Because he's so stupid, and I hate him so much."

"I think you like him," said Bonnie. "I think you've got a big crush on him because he's your boyfriend. What's he wearing?"

Ben was wearing normal clothes, except for his glasses, which weren't normal at all. The frames were made from some kind of sleek, mysterious metal, and there was what looked like two spirals painted on the lenses. He kept turning his head to stare at the people walking past him. Mostly the women. In fact, pretty much entirely the women. He was so distracted by the sight of Mayor Peggy Jackson sauntering past, in her green dress and high heels, that he didn't notice Susie until he had practically walked into her.

"Er," he said, noticing Susie, and seemed to stammer a bit. "Hi, Susie."

"Hello, Benjamin," said Susie, in an frosty voice. She didn't like the way he was looking at her one bit. She couldn't see his eyes through the spiral lenses, but somehow she felt certain that if she could see them, she wouldn't like what they were doing. "How are you?"

"I'm... uh... I'm great. Really... great. I bought these, uh... nifty glasses."

"Yes, I can see that. Very fashionable."

"Hey, I recognise those," said Bonnie, looking at the glasses. "I walked by a shop earlier where a man in a turban was selling them for only $9.99. Ben, did you really buy a pair of X-Ray Spex?"

"...maybe."

"Hah! Boys are so incredibly stupid. I bet you really believed you could see through women's clothing with them."

"Wait, what?" said Susie.

"Uh... I guess," admitted Ben.

"And now you feel like a dope, because they're just regular glasses with spirals painted on the lenses. What a total idiot you are," said Bonnie, bouncing up and down in her excitement to tell Ben off. "I can't wait to let the whole school know that Ben Hoolihan is a complete gullible horny moron. Sorry, but if you buy those stupid things you deserve to be punished for it."

"Yeah," said Ben, watching her bounce. "Whatever you said."