And Now for Something Sorta the Same but Completely Different

Melina kept her smile as Sam and Tyler bid her farewell to enjoy the rest of the fair. Her smile continued as she watched them walk away, losing them in the crowd. Her smile persisted as she finally turned back to the stand she was working with her fellow beverage makers.

“Heeeey Gummy Bear! How were your little frieeends?” Her one coworker, Justin, asked once Melina made it back. Melina didn’t respond with words, she simply stared at him while maintaining her brilliant smile. Until the façade broke, and her trademark happy mask cracked. Her eyes went slightly crazed and mournful as she collapsed onto the stand, her breasts big enough to cushion the impact and spill out to either side a bit but her forehead still hitting with a light thud as it met the counter, sending her long raven locks to scatter and pool in a mess around her slumped form.

“Oh shit! Tooth Fairy down! Code red! Code red! Activate countermeasure sugar twerk!” Justin cried. Oddly enough, the other coworker seemed to understand what that meant and moved to cover for them as Justin rushed to intercept his fallen comrade in coffee. Sliding in next to her as he leaned against the counter to get close and on her level.

“Heeeeyyy Sticky Toffee Pudding, what’s eating ya up?” Justin asked in as smooth and silky of a voice as he could muster. Which was quite silky smooth if he did say so himself. Which he does. Often. He claims it’s thanks to his British accent, roguish good looks, and overpowering sexual charm. The latter being disputed often. Especially by women who find out he bats for the same team.

“Nothing.” Melina responded morosely.

“Of course, of course. You obviously committed righteous headbutt retribution against our counter for a grave sin it committed against desserts everywhere. I understand. Shall I let you pop on or?” Justin said, playing the part of the wise sage. Whether he was actually good at it or simply faking was anyone’s guess.

“I don’t wanna talk about it.” Melina mumbled.

“Sure, sure. In that case, I’ll just throw out some wildly implausible scenarios until I get it right. Let’s see…” Justin mused.

“Please don’t” Melina pleaded but knew it wouldn’t work.

“Your Sugar, Spice and Everything Nice kingdom is being colonized by the licorice lackies who are enforcing very harsh tariffs on the pixie sticks trade?” Justin guessed.

“The Sugar, Spice and Everything Nice kingdom is fine.” Melina groaned, the pain of a very familiar argument evident in her voice.

“Good, good. In that case, an energetic and devilishly charismatic time traveler appeared out of nowhere just in the nick of time to save you from evil robots obsessed with extermination only to disappear from your life to leave you bewildered and sexually frustrated?” Justin continued.

“I still haven’t watched Doctor Who.” Melina lamented, a slight tinge of amusement escaping her voice despite herself.

“You really should, you really should. It is the superior media right next to Faulty Towers. But I digress.” Justin shrugged, “Oh! Maybe-“

“They’re just so perfect together!” Melina suddenly burst through held back tears as she **** a quivering smile, “She’s super nice! And pretty! And tall! And athletic! And kind! And just perfect for hiiiiiiiiim!” She finished before thunking her head back onto the counter.

“…… Does Wayne Brady need to **** a bitch?” Justin asked in a very serious voice.

“She’s not a bi-… That. She’s Sam. And you’d lose. She’s built like an amazon. She’s the Samazon.” Melina said in a muffled whimper.

“Wayne Brady don’t give a fuck! This vile temptress has curled her wicked fingers around your man! She will feel my wrath!” Justin declared, standing up straight with the look of a man about to go to war.

“Don’t.” Melina said, grabbing his arm with her own, “I’ll be fine. I’m just sad right now. Tyler’s a nice guy, he deserves someone like her. He’s out of my league anyway.”

Justin immediately whirled on the defeated girl, pulling her up from the table and embracing her in a tight hug while saying, “That’s quite enough of that my little cinnamon roll!” He forcefully whispered to her as his hug tightened, “You have exceeded your self-deprecation quota for the day, so I will hear no more of it! You are clearly undervaluing your own assets! That overgrown gingerbread woman’s got nothing on you! She ain’t no red velvet cake! She’s nothing but a sugar free twizzler! You’re the salted caramel crème brulee of everyone’s masturbation fantasies!”

“Justin! Gross!” Melina interrupted, which did absolutely nothing to stop him.

“Rich and creamy yet smooth to the point of melting in your mouth, the perfect combination of salty and sweet with the most elegant layer of caramelized sugar on top to give the satisfying crack as you break through it with your spoon. Served with your choice of ras, black, and blue berries. Aaaaahhh… Makes the mouth water just thinking about it.”

“…… Now I’m hungry.” Melina complained after a few moments.”

“Me too now that you mention it. Funny how that happens.” Justin replied.

“Thanks Justin, I feel a little better now.”

“Any time my little angel food cake. Any time. Now! We best return to our posts before we’re accused of absconding of our duties.”

Justin finally ended the hug after giving her head a loving pat which turned into him undoing a few tangles in her hair he found. They both returned to their respective posts, one with thoughts of loss and somber eloquence, the other with thoughts of righteous vengeance full of hilarious flair. Melina blew her nose and straightened out her apron, tucking her "assets" back into place and regaining her composure in the process before she wandered back out to the front of their stall’s little area for welcoming customers. Her emotions back in check, she donned her famed mask of endless happiness, and returned to exuberantly offering her services to anyone that wandered by with all the cheer of a sugar plum fairy. Carefully ignoring the fresh yet healing wound that lay below the surface. She did not notice the slight bit of energy that poked the back of her neck, nor the figure escaping into the shadows. She also failed to notice the mostly naked woman covered in patches of poorly glued on feathers, tied up, hung like a pinata and a phallus shaped object protruding from her posterior with beautiful plumage attached. A beak mask that apparently doubled as a gag muffled the woman's cursing protests as a group of people stood around laughing and whacking her with foam bats. But that’s understandable to miss. Nothing out of the ordinary there.

AUTHORS NOTE:

Hey guys! Sorry for the delay and short update. Really wanted to get something out since it's been a while. Thanks for your patience! This tale will be told to totality in time, trust the tall teller.