The trail of the streaking woman

Annie couldn’t miss her chance, she doubled down to the stairs and went to the alley, but the woman was long gone… although a trace of her remained. A discarded banana peel, a plastic bag, cookie crumbs, the woman left a trace of garbage at her wake. A trail to follow.

“Topless woman?” replied the waitress at the dinner outside the alley. “Yeah, I saw her all right, so did everyone else here. We all had a good laugh when she tripped on a banana peel and crashed onto the window. She shrieked and went down the street, over there. I took a picture of her with her chest squished against the glass if you want to see it.”

“Yes,” said the street cleaner, squinting at the photo on Annie’s phone. “I recognize that woman, even with her breasts mushed against a window like that. She came running like a hen out of a foxhole. When she saw me, she ducked to the bushes and ran into that house over there.”

“That harlot came through here all right, she ruined our weekly family game!” answered the middle-aged soccer mom. “She barged in, streaked across the living room, and then tried to get out the backdoor. Jokes on her, we always keep it locked! While she was running around looking for another door, little Timmy tried to play with her and grabbed that disgusting lid she had.”

“You should have seen my wife!” commented her balding husband. “When that woman demanded that our son give that thing back, she got up and gave her the biggest dressing down I’ve ever seen! Even I was scared!”

“Well, she deserved it! Barging into our house to corrupt our baby boy... Anyway, she got so scared that she opened a window and jumped out before I was done! I think I saw her running into the supermarket next door.”

“That intruder? Affirmative, she came through here, ma’am!” The security guard saluted Annie. “She tried to infiltrate our facility through the backdoor and appropriate our clothing supplies. I gave chase when she refused to stand down.

“I pursued her across all of our aisles and even asked for help aprehending her from our other loyal customers, but the rascals only laughed in response. The intruder ran out the front door and exfiltrated the compound through a small hole at the bottom of the west fence, but she lost her rearguard in the process.”

Rearguard? Annie examined the wall. Oh, he meant her panties. They got stuck on the fence when she tried to escape, that poor woman. There was a house next to the fence, maybe she went there?

“Party girl? Yah, dude, she came thought here.” Answered the slightly drunk boy. The lights inside the house were spinning and the music was blaring, they were having a party.

“Jumped in from the window and landed on the punch fountain in like, the buff. She got completely covered in it, even her happy trail waqs soaked in punch! It was so funny! We all cheered her and screamed “party girl, party girl!” but she like covered her face and ignored us. She pushed past all my dudes and jumped through the window on the back.”

And then the trail went cold. Behind the house was a small forested area with no other witnesses. Annie used her flashlight to look for more clues and …yes! She found some footprints on the dirt.

The sleuth followed them for quite a while. From her tracks, it seemed like the naked woman went around in circles for a bit, fell into a pond (or perhaps dove in to clean herself) came back out, snapped some tree branches for cover, abandoned said branches, and then finally she managed to get out of the woods and into… Huh.