Ask Abbie what she was doing

You lie still for a moment, wondering whether you should confront your sister about what she was doing, or just pretend that you never really woke up, now that she’s stopped. You think about how she’s been acting all day. This isn’t just a one-off thing. You need to know what’s going on with her. Deal with it out in the open.

“Abbie…” you say softly in the darkness, “what were you doing?”

You hear her **** back a sob. “Nothing Beanpole. You had a bad dream, go back to sleep.”

You roll over so you’re facing her. You can see there are tears on her face. “I wasn’t dreaming. Something's up with you. I want to help.” You tell her.

She shakes her head. “But… I don’t think you can help, when you’re my problem,” she whispers.

“I am?” you ask, surprised.

She nods, then shakes her head. “I mean… I’m the problem, but it’s about you. I can’t get you out of my mind. I keep having… thoughts about you. Thoughts that a sister shouldn’t have. It started with a dream last night, and since then, every time I see you, or touch you, I tingle. Even when you’re not around, all I can think about is you.”

“I know how wrong it is. You’re probably disgusted by me right now… by what I was doing. I can’t help how I feel though. And I can’t help thinking… who’s business is it but ours. We wouldn’t be hurting anyone. There’s no one in the world I love more than you, Dave. And I know no one will ever love me more than you do. I’ve done so many things with guys I don’t love — that I hardly know sometimes.”

“I… I want to do those things with you. With love.” She says in a small, pleading voice.

You put an arm around her and hug her tight. You can feel that she’s shaking. She buries her face against your chest, and you can feel her tears dampening your shirt.

“I’m not disgusted. I could never be disgusted by you, Abs. You’re my cool big sister, who watches out for me. I’m… surprised. You never said anything like this before. Never gave me any clue. Until today.”

She nods. “I felt different today — after that dream. Things became clear. All those times I told you to be bolder with girls, to take a chance, I think… deep down, I must have meant I wanted you to be bold with me. If you had taken a chance… I think I would have said yes.”

You start to tremble now.

“The answer is still yes. Whatever you want to do about this. I’ll go along with it. If you want to be proper, stay as normal brother and sister… I think I could do it. It would be hard, the way I feel right now. But if you want more. That’s what I want. I don’t care about what we’re supposed to do, or what society says is right or acceptable. All that matters to me is whether you want me, Dave.”

For a while, there’s just the sound of the two of you breathing heavily in the darkness. You are stunned by what she said, but you can’t find any argument to disagree with her. You hear your voice, almost like it’s someone else speaking the words. “I... I want you, too.”