I find her

I walk between the trees, trying to figure out where my sister is. It is a full moon tonight, with no clouds in front of it at the moment. So, I can see pretty clearly. I come across one girl who panics and runs away, but I noticed her hair was blonde and I am searching for a redhead. Sometime later I come across another girl, but her hair was too short to be Gwendolyn. Although this girl was heading in my direction, so I actually had to run away from her.

The third girl I come across has red hair. Long red hair too. There is only one girl with such long red hair and that is my sister. I found her! And she is walking towards me as well. She must remember our promise for making a Samhain child tonight.

I start walking towards her and can’t help but smile as everything is about to turn out the way we planned it. But suddenly, Gwen freezes and turns to run away.

“Gwendolyn! Wait!” I yell at her and start giving chase.

What could have made her run away like that? Was there a guy behind me? I look behind but see nobody. Maybe she got confused and thought I was someone else.

“Gwen! It’s me! Stop!” I yell again, but Gwen is not stopping.

I try my best to catch up to her, but then I notice her quickly crawling over a rope. Shit, is this where the path is? It must be. Only when Gwen is on the other side of the path does she finally stop running. As a guy, I of course can’t risk stepping on the path, so I make it so I stay on my side of the rope.

“Gwen, why did you start running?” I ask her. “Don’t you remember our promise?”

“We promised to look after each other.” Gwen tells me with a very stern voice. Then she looks into my eyes and asks, “So where were you when dad kicked me out?”

It’s true. I should have stood by her. Ever since it happened, I have regretted not doing anything. I look down, unable to face her and then say, “I’m sorry. I was scared.”

“Scared?” Gwen asks. “Dad threw me out of the house! I was naked! Don’t you think I was scared?!”

I look at Gwen again and say, “I didn’t know what to do! I didn’t know what to say! You’ve seen dad angry before. He doesn’t want to listen to other people when he is like that. He is always right, even when he’s wrong. And when he is actually proven wrong, he storms off in anger to his brewery where he can be by himself.”

Gwendolyn takes a breath and says, “I had to ask Riannon’s family if I could spend the night with them. They were kind enough to offer me a place to stay. But after dad told everyone about us having sex, Quinn started worrying about his daughters. It also didn’t help that he went to talk to dad about what happened. I’m sure dad told him a whole bunch of lies. So, then I got kicked out from there as well because Quinn thought I would be a bad influence on his daughters!”

As Gwen tells me about what happened, her eyes get moist and I feel she is about to start crying. As she wipes her tears away is tell her, “I didn’t know.”

“You’re goddamn right you didn’t know!” Gwen suddenly blows up against me. “You never bothered to come talk to me!”

“I couldn’t!” I say. “Mom and dad made certain to keep me away from you. I’ve been wanting so badly to just talk to you, but I never found a chance to do it. It’s also not as if Gavin is the most hospitable guy either, you know.”

“The point is that I couldn’t rely on you, Gawain.” She tells me. “I needed you to be there for me, but you weren’t.”

I wish I could tell her otherwise, but I can’t. Gwen is right. I was not enough of a man to stand up for her back then and so we have been pulled apart. If I am going to get Gwen back, I’m going to have to prove her that from now on, I am going to be there for her.

I take a deep breath, then tell Gwendolyn. “You’re right, sister. About everything. I should have stood by you, and I didn’t. When dad kicked you out of the house, I didn’t do what I was supposed to do. But I have learned from that. Ever since then, I’ve been thinking about that day. About what I could have done differently. I came to the conclusion that I should have gone to the elders. Explain to them that it was not just you, but both of us. That the reason we grew so close to each other is because of Samhain. That we were under the guidance of the souls of our ancestors.”

“And what then, Gawain?” Gwen asks as she places her hands at her sides. “What would have happened then? What would have been different?”

“I would have told the elders that I no longer want to return home. That I would rather sleep in the woods than go back home. Perhaps then you wouldn’t have to live at Gavin’s farm and we could both be homeless together. We could have found some dead branches in the forest and build ourselves a roof. We would have found a way to make it happen. And if the village didn’t want us anymore, than we would simply leave. Travel to another village. To some place where people don’t know us. There we could pretend we weren’t siblings and start a new life. I am still willing to do that for you now, Gwen.”