Kang the conquer pt 1

How did it come to this. I was just minding my own business now here I am stuck between Deadpool and Kang the Conquer.

Kang is a rather complicated issue regarding prime world. Apparently he wasn't supposed to be multi-dimensional threat. Originally he was just a background character until a prime worlder decided that it would be funny to tell him the truth about his existence. Which is why they go around doing whatever they please hoping world to world. It also explains their **** hatred for prime worlders as everytime a prime worlder encounters them they immediately attack.

This is why I am currently running for my life being chased by Kang the Conquer. As for I didn't just call the Angelus or possibly the Phoenix **** well they were currently off world hunting other girls for my harem. I was planning on taking things slowly but Phoenix **** said that she wanted to just go to prime world soon and told me to just give her a list so she could just grab the girls I wanted. Since I didn't want her to just blow up worlds along the way I had her take Angelus with her.

I figured after recruiting various super powerful women that I was safe enough. So while I was balls deep in Rubanna Quormo aka Caregiver (one of the elders of the universe) playing with her three breast Deadpool decided to pay me a visit courtesy of Reed Richard. If it wasn't for his incessant need to crak jokes I would have immediately been sent to Sheogorath.

Deadpool: Wow you're all the way to the hilt let's see if I can do the same to you!

Honestly I couldn't have been more relieved to find out that he meant his sword and not his... you know what best not to think about it. So fortunately Rubanna and I barely missed getting a sword to our naked bodies. This quickly led to Deadpool chasing me all over New York. Spider-Man tried to stop him and so did the X-men but he was extremely determined. Unfortunately our fight attracted a lot of unwanted attention.

Technically I could have actually beaten Deadpool thanks to my dad's psychotic anti-charater training. Unfortunately I couldn't get into the mindset to do this because I have never really been in a live combat scenario before. There was also the fact I was trying my best to reveal the fact that I could fight. What was worse was every time I tried to get some clothes Deadpool seemed to immediately take aggressive action to prevent me from wearing anything.

It didn't take long for news crews to begin reporting on the famous Dr. Noches running through the city naked chased by Deadpool. Sue eventually caught up to us with the rest of the Fantastic Four and **** Reed to call off the hit against me (which is how I found out about it). Reed was arrested by Shield for targeting me although I doubt that they were really going to do anything really against the smartest man in the world. I finally thought I could relax and that it was over but I was wrong.

Apparently being the center of attention made it easy for Kang to figure out that I was a Prime worlder. Barely a half hour after the incident was over did Kang the fucking conquer show up. He didn't even bother explaining the problem and just started shooting directly at me ignoring everything else. Fortunately my adrenaline was still pumping after my near **** prior.

Dodging plasma bolts fired at my head was definitely terrifying. Seeing Kang literally bitch slap Thor pushed my fear index higher than I thought possible. He barely broke stride as he did that and continued shooting. If I didn't know any better I would believe that Sheogorath was behind this or did I pick up a curse from somewhere? Either way I was **** to continue to run until Angelus and Phoenix **** were back or by some comic book based miracle I was saved some how.