Laurie is left back alone

As we were about to enter the store, a car pulled up on our kerb and its passenger window pulled down. "Rian?"

"Oh, darling," she turned around and exposed me to the car, a Ford Fiesta with her boyfriend Dan in the driver's seat, "thank God you're here!"

"What's the meaning of this?"

"Oh, it's so horrible!" she continued in a mock sob, "My cousin Laurie came over for breakfast and took all her clothes off! Then my mum wanted me to be as loose as her and then took the clothes right off my body! She then made us go to Tesco to get stuff for tea all starkers! I can't be seen like this with my reputation, so I had to use my cousin here to cover me!"

"That's horrid," Dan said in a sympathetic tone, "I've still got some of your stuff at my place."

"Oh love, would you?! You are such a knight in shining armour," as he unlocked the passenger door. Rian put me down, got her phone from the purse, gave the purse to me, slapped my right buttock, kissed me on the forehead, then adopted the classic ENF pose for the full two yards she had to run to Dan's car, getting in. I could see him taking a flannel overshirt off himself and giving it to Rian, who gigglingly took and donned it.

"Bye, love, the list's in the purse and have fun on the way home!" she shouted at me before winking and rolling up the window. As Dan pulled away I could see her swiping my phone and showing things to a laughing Dan.

Sighing, I went inside the shop and began looking for the list in the purse.