Do it, you only live one (or twice?)

'Fuck it,' you think, a little wobbly, as you see Peter peal off and walk to the kitchen. 'I'm already in the weirdest place possible, might as well see what it is actually like to talk to me. I'm sure he'd like to get a good look at this piece after all.'

You walk over and say, "Hi Will."

"Oh hi Molly," he says, seemingly a bit surprised. "What's up?"

"Nothing much, just trying to have some fun tonight. Nice to toast Jack." In the oddness of the conversation, you can't help but smile. You could imagine how you would react to your crush walking up to you, especially after what happened.

He smiles a bit too, but seems nervous. As you exchange small talk, you can't help but think about how you acted towards women. Always so afraid. You had always been timid, never asking for what you really wanted. In many ways, you just wanted to be the nice guy but that still got you into trouble. And it definitely didn't get you laid. But why? 'Why had I -- why had Will been so afraid to assert himself?' you think as you stare into your old face, into the green eyes that had looked back from the mirror for so long.

You laugh at some stupid joke your old self had made and watch him a bit closer. You hadn't been a male model or a bodybuilder, but your old body was relatively fit from running and a little lifting. You notice the hair on your old chest, peaking through the v of his shirt. You notice the line of your shoulder through the fabric.

"How do you think I look tonight?" You suddenly ask. You are wobbly, but your body feels good and warm. 'Oof I might be drunker than I thought.'

You twirl around, making sure to give him a good view of your profile and your ass.

"Uh you look great," said Will, eyes wide.

"Do you like my dress?" You giggle a little bit. You sound so feminine now. You step closer, making sure to stand with your chest out so he gets a nice view of your cleavage.

"It's lovely, umm...you look good in black." He seems more nervous now.

"I'm glad." You say. "When I picked it out I was hoping you would like it."

"Really?" He said.

Suddenly you begin to feel frustrated, at him - at yourself. All of your problems with women came down to that thing - that lack of confidence, that self-loathing. Maybe it was the vodka, but you had enough.

"You know Will, why do you never express yourself? It's not wrong to say how you feel."

"Uh...I don't know," Will responds. "I think I do just fine."

"Ugh!" you grunt. "Just be a man!"