It's a little complicated...

"What do you mean... complicated?" I asked, incredulously.

"You never did pay attention in history class, did you?" Miss Adams said with a self satisfied smirk. I glared at her hatefully but it didn't seem to dampen her mood at all. She continued. "Well, If you DID pay attention in history class, you'd know that our little town was originally founded by Adamites!"

"Whatamites?" I blurted out in response.

"Adamites." She replied. "You know, like Adam? From the Bible?"

I really didn't know where she was going with this, so I just shook my head and said "What?"

Miss. Adams sighed and said at last. "They were religious nudists, dear."

"No fucking way..." Was all I could think to say.

"Yes way!" Miss. Adams said, happily. "They fled to this remote location to escape religious persecution and set up a small settlement right here where our town now stands. Unfortunately for our ancestors here, a colony of puritans settled down not far from their little safe haven. Both settlements grew and grew until they shared a boarder. Eventually tensions rose, boarders began to blur and eventually both settlements merged into the humble little community you were born and raised in, but here's the interesting bit: our current town charter is the same one established by the Adamites all those years ago! While our puritan ancestors added provisions against "Lewd Behavior" the provisions protecting public nudity in and of itself still stand! So it is actually perfectly legal for you to be as naked as you please! Or in this case, as naked as your mother pleases..."

I shook my head again in disbelief. There was no way any of this was true! There was just no way! The wheels were turning frantically in my mind as I struggled to find some way out of this situation. Grasping at straws, I asked "Okay, but... what about the school dress code? There has to be some kind of dress code, right? I remember Jessica got in trouble once for wearing a pair of sweatpants that said 'Juicy' on the back, but you're telling me I can go to school butt naked and it's fine?!"

"Well..." Miss. Adams began "The dress code does maintain that students are forbidden from wearing clothing with offensive or lewd materials on it, but I don't see how that could apply here. You're not wearing anything at all! Your butt can't SAY juicy on it, but your butt can be as juicy as you like and there's not a thing the school board can do about it!"

"But... isn't being naked... lewd? Aren't those the same thing?" I offered.

"Nope! Nude is not Lewd!" Miss. Adams answered. "These are important distinctions my dear. The human body is a beautiful thing! Nudity is perfectly natural and has absolutely NOTHING to do with sex or lewdness. You really should try keeping a more open mind, Cici..."

Easy for her to say! She's not the one sitting here NAKED! Still not ready to give up, I kept up the fight "So you're telling me there's NOTHING in the school dress code that says we have to wear clothes?"

"Nope!" She answered quickly.

"Nothing that says we have to cover our bodies in any way?"

"Well..." She said, wavering.

"Well, what?" I shot back, hope growing in my bare breast.

"Well, it does say that student apparel should provide adequate coverage of the private parts, specified as the genitals for both sexes, and nipples for girls..."

"Aha!" I shouted in triumph! I nearly jumped right out of the car to do a victory dance before remembering my unfortunate state of undress and thought better of it. "So you CAN'T send me to school like this! I'd be in violation of the dress code the minute I walked through the door!"

"Well..." Miss. Adams said, still clearly not ready to give in.

"You JUST said I need to be able to cover my privates! So either give me something to cover up with, or I'm not getting out of this car!"