Best Buds

A/N: Wanted to try something different so this chapter is mostly dialogue.

“I was thinking of buying a house.”

“You mean renting a house,” Mike said as he spun his pencil around in his fingers.

“No way would my dad rent one.”

“Why would he buy a house when we are only going to be there for a few years?”

“You know my dad,” I said with a shrug. “He’ll see it as an investment. Buy the house, we live in it, then turn it into a rental property when we graduate.”

“Because your family doesn’t have enough money.”

I sighed. “That’s how Dad is.”

“Probably why you’re rich.”

“Pretty sure it’s the government contracts.”

“Those might help a bit too.” Setting the pencil down, he scratched his head. “Why don’t we just live in the dorms?”

“Shocked you would even consider it. I thought you were all in on the house thing.”

“I mean, I was.”

I grinned. “I’m sure it has nothing to do with being the personal plaything of seven hot girls.”

“Whaaa. Who? Me? First off, I am not a plaything.”

“Clearly someone doesn’t sit with them at lunch.”

“They seriously call me that?” he asked, shocked.

“Nah. More, ‘sex machine.’”

He thought for a long moment before shrugging. “I can live with that.”

“Uh-huh. Circling back to the house—”

“Dorms.”

“You seriously going to spend all of college chasing girls?”

“Some of us don’t have girlfriends we can call up for some late-night action.”

“I can share mine.” Mike stared at me. “What?”

“You actually sounded serious there.”

“I was. What? It’s not like you two haven’t done anything before.” I narrowed my eyes. “Or are you saying you already forgot about her?”

“No, I haven’t. Also not sure how I feel about my best friend pawning off his girlfriend on me.”

“I’m not asking you to wine and dine her. That’s my job. Just saying if you and her wanted to have a quick tumble or two…” I shrugged.

“And you’re okay with that.”

“It’s not just me. It’s our thing. And yes, it’s okay with me.”

Mike let out a heavy sigh. “I don’t know what’s more fucked up. You telling me this, or me considering it.”

I chuckled. “I knew it. Once you had a taste—”

“Okay, gross. Now I’m definitely not doing it.”

“Pick her on Friday.”

“Dude, I’m not picking your girlfriend.”

“Eh... Sounds like you’ve already decided.”

“Not happening.”

“Okay, so let me ask you something.” He gestured for me to continue. “Say you had a girlfriend.”

“Low blow, dude.”

“Says the man who wants to fuck my girl.”

“I don’t—! Ugh. Just continue.”

“So, you have a girlfriend. Would you be willing to have a threesome with her?”

“Why not? Wait— What kind of threesome?”

“Two girls.”

“Oh, sure.”

“Okay, so you’re fine with sharing your girlfriend with another girl, but not a guy?”

“It’s not sharing.”

“How is that not sharing?”

“I mean…” He didn’t answer.

“Because you’re the one sticking your dick in another girl? What if your girlfriend wants to eat the other girl out? Finger her? Make out with her? That’s all okay because it’s with another girl? What if she is doing all this and you’re just watching?”

“You are making me question things. I don’t like this.”

“Just asking questions.”

“And I don’t like the answers.”

“Look, I love Emma to ****. Our relationship is solid and I trust her completely. Her having sex with other guys… It’s no different than a threesome. The other person is only there to enhance our sex life. They get to have fun with Emma, Emma and I have our thing. Everyone wins. If I didn’t trust her, or if I felt some guy would steal her away from me, this wouldn’t be happening. I know that isn’t going to happen though.” I grinned. “Not even a legendary ‘sex machine’ is going to make her suddenly want to stop dating me.”

“… Pretty sure I can get her to question it.”

“Fuck you.”

“…”

“…”

“So, dorms,” he said.

“We are not living in the dorms!”

“Okay, okay, hear me out. Dorms have a bunch of horny guys in them, right? Just imagine all of them getting a turn with Emma!”

“I hate you so much.”

“Come on, dude. I got big plans for college!”

“Which are?”

“Find a girlfriend.”

“What else?”

“That’s pretty much everything.”

“Okay, so how are you going to do that?”

“…”

“So you don’t actually have a plan, just a goal.”

“I’m a ‘big picture’ man, not a details man. I leave that to you.” He snapped his fingers. “Captain America.”

“What does that have to do with anything?”

“We ask your brother how he got all… Captain America. He had ladies throwing themselves at him, right?”

“My brother is a manslut.”

“Yeah, but he got a girlfriend out of it, right? I don’t care how many girls I have to sleep with to get one, but it’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make.”

“What happened to the guy who nearly passed out when he saw Emma was the one joining the DnD group?”

“He had sex with her.”

“…Suddenly, this kinda feels like my fault.”

“So we have a plan!”

“We do?”

“Yeah! We find out what secret black magic shit your brother did, copy it, then bang our way through hordes of women until we find a girlfriend!”

“Two problems.”

“Oh?”

“I already have a girlfriend.”

“Sounds like a you problem.”

“Fair. Second problem, pretty sure the ‘black magic shit’ is brutal exercise and diet.”

“That sounds like a pretty big problem.” I nodded, expecting that to be the end of it. “When do we start?”

“You’re kidding.”

“What part of, ‘big plans’ and ‘girlfriend’ was confusing?”

“Where does education come in?”

“Eh. It’s all about who you know rather than what you know.”

“You want to work at my dad’s company.”

“Yay, nepotism!”

“Still, why do I have to join in on this super-soldier stuff?”

“Moral support?”

“Eh.”

“Because just imagine how Emma will look at you when you have your brother’s bod.”

“… Go on.”

He laughed. “There is another reason why you should work out with me.”

“Yeah?”

He nodded, giving me a serious look. “Imagine me with your brother’s bod and unlimited access to your girlfriend. I mean, you two started as friends before you started dating. Maybe I don’t have to look all that far for a girlfriend after all.”

“… On an unrelated note, been thinking about grabbing a gym membership…”

“Great idea! There is one near the dorms.”

“God damn it.”