Guilt Ridden

Mindy left the kitchen and almost immediately he brought a hand to her eyes, rubbing them slowly, "Fuck, Mindy...what are you doing?" She whispered under her breath, the reality of seeing her best friend in so much pain for her actions was like a slap to the face. What good could come out of sabotaging Kenny's love life, what victory would it be to not only crush Kenny but undoubtedly crush Anna, a girl who has done nothing wrong, as well? "I don't think I can do this anymore," Mindy almost whimpered as she headed off, a giant lump sitting in her throat.

The Asian girl of course made no attempt to even look for Anna, she knew well enough that if Kenny couldn't find her then Brian was already putting his full plan into action. So her only hope to even try to undo what she did was talk to him again, see if there was maybe, just a drop, of something actually good inside Brian. It was a long shot but at this point, even though she still wanted to be with Kenny, hurting him anymore was out of the question.

Looking from room to room, Mindy eventually found Brian, the blonde was away from the rest of the party, relaxing at the far end of a hallway, seemingly passing the time without a care. Scampering over to him, Brian looked up and let out a long exhale as he saw Mindy approaching, "Oh good, what did I do to you this time?" He muttered out,

"I'm calling this off," Mindy immediately replied causing Brian's brow to immediately narrow,

"What?" He asked with a bemused smirk, "Calling what off?"

"This! Everything, the whole plan with Kenny and Anna, us pretending to be together, all of it! It's over, okay?!" Mindy exclaimed, sounding much more panicked instead of angry,

Brian's whole body suddenly relaxed again and he looked down at Mindy, a mocking look in his eyes, "A little late for that now, girl, afraid your attack of conscious came a little too late," Mindy's eyes filled with distress, "I told you, I was going to handle this so we were both happy, and I did. Now if you want to go sulk in a corner instead of going to scrape up some sloppy seconds that's all you, but you're not fucking with my end. I am getting Anna, and Kenny is getting out of my way, end of discussion,"

"Brian, this isn't right! These are our friends, they are real fucking people, not toys to manipulate to get what you want," Mindy pleaded, "Just stop this, you can have just about anyone else around, just leave Kenny and Anna alone. It's the right thing to do,"

"Cry me a fucking river," Brian sneered, "I've had my eyes on that blonde for over a year now and no way is Kenny fucking Clark going to get what I want. All those fucking weeks of "changing" myself for the better was a waste of time. In the end this is how you get results and I always knew that. I don't give a fuck about the "right" thing to do, all that matters in this life is getting what you want," Brian's voice was sharp, sinister now, "You wanted Kenny and you have the chance to get him now, you'd be a fool not to take it. I am gonna have Anna, and anyone else I want afterwards, besides I already had you too," Brian said with a half snort causing Mindy to hang her head in shame, "This is what's happening, swallow it and remember if you rat me out, everyone is going to know just how much of a help you were," The blonde finished as he causally strode past Mindy with a victorious grin.

Mindy let out huffing breaths as she stood locked in place, his fists were balled up and her body was almost trembling. A venom of spite and hatred was flowing through her whole body and she hadn't a clue what to do with it. It felt like Brian bested her...again, and this was the last time, her last chance to change things. Whatever Brian was doing now was going to ruin Kenny and Anna's relationship and there wasn't anything she could do to stop it.

Mindy suddenly heard a soft, tender voice that she hadn't heard in quite awhile, "Mindy, there you are, I've been looking," Turning her head she saw JJ slowly approaching her with an easy smile, "Please, can I talk to you? Just for a minute, I have something I need to say, and after that I'll go...I swear,"

"JJ, I --" Mindy began to reply only for JJ to hold up his hands,

"Please, just let me," He interrupted as he moved to stand in front of her. Since the teens conversation with his sister he stopped drinking, used to time to sober up as much as he could and thought everything over. Kailyn was right, of course, he needed to talk but he couldn't wait until morning, he needed to talk to Mindy tonight, right now. "Mindy, look, I...I needed to talk to you more time about everything. I needed to be fully honest with you about it too. Earlier this week, I tried to tell you Brian wasn't good enough for you and I honestly meant that. He's not good enough for you, I don't think anyone is good enough for you,"

Mindy's rage faltered and she looked up at JJ with soft eyes, "You're...amazing, Mindy. I've been your friend for years now and I always tried to look out for you and be someone you could trust. Thing is...I didn't know how much you meant to me until I saw you with Brian,"

"JJ..." Mindy whispered,

"I know you always had a thing for Kenny, and I wasn't going to get in the way of that. Hell, even now part of me thinks I could accept that but I can't even be sure. This week, seeing you with Brian, I wanted to drop him to the fucking floor, and not because I thought he'd hurt you but because he...he was with you...and I wasn't," Mindy let out the softest of gasps and kept her eyes locked on JJ's, "Seeing him kiss you...touch you...anything, it made me so angry and jealous because I...I want to be that guy for you. I want to take care of you and make sure you're never hurt,"

"Oh JJ..." Mindy sincerely said while taking a half step forward,

The jock let out a nervous laugh and tossed his hands up briefly, "And I know how you feel for Ken, believe me, I heard every word of that when you told me. I just...if you can look past him, if you can let go of a guy who isn't fit to even be near you...I'll do everything for you. You're the closest friend I have, and I am willing to accept that I want more than that from you. It's funny...all those girlfriends I had in school and we broke off because it wasn't right, I get it now. None of them ever had a chance because the one girl I actually wanted...was always standing right in front of me," Mindy's lower lip trembled and her eyes grew wet, "I don't mean to put you on the spot and I don't want you to feel like you have to say anything but...but I had to tell you, at least once..."

Mindy opened her mouth to speak but only a breaking breath and squeak escaped. JJ grimaced, unsure of what he had just done until Mindy suddenly dove forward, wrapping her arms tightly around him, "I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" Mindy cried out into his chest, "I was so fucking stupid! I'm such a bad person!"

"Whoa, whoa, what are you talking about Mindy, it's alright," JJ soothingly replied while slowly wrapping his arms around Mindy's back, "You have nothing to be sorry about, and no, being with Brian doesn't make you a bad person,"

Mindy pulled out of his embrace and looked up with pitiful, ashamed eyes, "No, JJ, you don't understand I --" She began to say before stopping dead, his words catching in her throat,

"What? What don't I understand?" JJ urged her to continue only for Mindy to fearfully tighten her lips shut, "Mindy, you know you can trust me. Whatever you want to say stays between us, and if something...if something is wrong, I need you to tell me so I can help," The black jock sternly said, his tone turning protective as he immediately thought of Brian and what the blonde might have done to her,

"You'll hate me..." Mindy whispered back,

"Never gonna happen," JJ assured her, "If you can't believe anything else, believe that,"

Mindy trembled hard before a shaky breath left her mouth, "Okay..." Mindy gulped, "Brian and I, we never were really dating. We never even liked each other, it was all an act," JJ's eyes narrowed uncertainly, lost in confusion but he stayed quiet, letting Mindy explain, "K-Kenny got with Anna, and I...I was jealous, and so was Brian. He...he told me that he knew how to get the apart so I could be with Kenny and he could be with Anna. He said it was the right thing to do, and that following our hearts and believing in that love wasn't actually wrong,"

"Fuck..." JJ sighed in disappointment, "He manipulated you,"

"No, he may have told me things I wanted to hear, but this is my fault too! I'm not innocent here, JJ!" Mindy sharply corrected, not daring to let herself off the hook, "He told me us acting like a couple would keep suspicion down and...and I was dumb, impulsive...I gave him my virginity while we pretended to like each other," JJ let out a small sympathetic nod,

"Alright...so what else happened then? What did you two do?" JJ gently asked back,

"Brian came up with this plan for the party and explained that getting Eric here would surely get Anna and Kenny fighting. He was right, and now...God, JJ, Kenny is so upset and I did that to him! And it's only going to get worse, Brian said whatever his plan is was already in motion. I helped destroy Kenny's only relationship out of selfish jealousy and now my best friend is going to be crushed!" Mindy exclaimed in anguish,

"That's not true, we can fix this, we just need to go tell Kenny what's going on. We can stop whatever Brian is --" JJ quickly replied as he took Mindy's hand to lead her off,

"No, no, wait!" Mindy begged, "I can't, JJ. Brian said that if anyone finds out he is going to let everyone know what I did! I know I fucked up, but everyone knowing that I helped break Kenny and Anna up while getting used for sex...he's serious JJ, you don't get it,"

JJ's eyes flared, "Oh is that what he said?" JJ wet his lips and Mindy could see the veins in his neck almost pulse for a moment, "Mindy...trust me, we're going to get this fixed, but one thing that has to happen. You have to go tell Kenny the truth,"

"What about Anna and Eric? I have no clue where they are or what Brian's full plan is," Mindy replied,

"It doesn't matter, we're going to cut this off, and I know exactly who can help," JJ replied before his eyes narrowed, "We're gonna get this sonofabitch,"