Dad's issues

There in the middle of the room stood his father. Dressed in only his briefs.

"Uh, Dad... What is going on?" a puzzled Jacob asked.

"Jacob, as you might know that the number of churchgoers in my services are declining. The wealth of our family depends on it, that is why I have invented this device which might help me to make the service more interesting. Do you know of any celebrity who might spice things a bit up if they did the ceremony? Or somebody else who might be universally sexy for attracting interest?" David asked naively.

"Uh..." Jacob pondered hard. And finally said...